Bells ring in as,
I wake them,
Fate has,
No meaning,
Seething,
Writhing,
Tossing,
Turning,
They will burn and,
Die.
I asked .. "why"?
" Because we can",
Came the reply.
"There must be a way,"
I thought to myself,
.. ..... .. ..... ..
There's nothing,
No,
Not at all.
They came to destroy,
That Is .. .. .. All.
That's .. .. ..
All they know,
What to do,
Decades past,
But I knew.
They .. .. .. wanted to,
That's the answer,
No substitute,
For the disaster,
They didn't my life .. .. ..
After All.
They wanted my death,
So they could applaud.
..
So they could applaud.
..
Everything is gone ..
And I have to accept my fate.
Not a single friend,
The world .. ..
So full,
of hate.
..
..
So full
of hate .. .. Control,
Was their .. .. .
Option,
Control,
The only plan
Great pride,
In knowing.
I had .. no where.
I've never known,
Evil this
tenacious,
Before.
I realised,
That .. .. ..
The pain in my brain,
Came .. .. .. .. .. back.
It came back .. .. .. ..
I don't know why,
Death, Was to be my fate,
But no more tears are left.
.
The strength .. .. .. .. ..
To end my life .. .. .. ...
Is all I need.
I fought my best,
But this .. ..
Is the destiny,
Cast down on me.
..
I asked Pavati,
What did she need ?
For me to die,
Most,
Definitely.
Definitely.
A Definition of war vs peace.
I chose the later,
But the former,
Was the world's need.
From me,
Taken .. ..
Every piece of life.
Just so that they
could say,
"It was us",
"We made him die".
The hard work that went into it,
I never knew it,
There was so much systematic,
*******,
But in the end,
I'll take their souls with me.
..
Turns out,
The cause of evil,
Really simply put,
.
Is Greed

Positioned
in prime position,
I remenice of,
A day when,
I could just ... Get on with it.
Simply a dream.
But I'm inspired
To keep on fighting.
Till I'm
Reminiscent,
of ..... Better thingx.
Like ... ... ... ... ... Anything other then the last nightmares I lived with.
... ... ... ... ...
Crimson Tidex Cross my mind,
But my life is timeless,
One day ... ... ... ... ... far from now,
I'll get my chance to start.
But ... ... ... Before that happenx,
I have to tear some
worldx ... ... ... ... ... ... ... Apart.

I really did care man,
You know,
I have to blow it,
Time and again,
I get hit all at once man.
And itx Frustrating.........
Therex too many stonex that were thrown,
And they all need to be r3turned,
If they haven't already man,
I wish I had a helping hand.
One that wasn't there
To steal and condemn,
A real hand.
Just once man ...........

Chomped Down
Hard man,
Timex change,
And I'm cut to pieces.
Time and again.
Its ******* funny,
How people
With their .......................
Gamex ....... Think that they could control me man.
But I'm cut off and jammed for all time now man.
Thatx it then....
Please God let the time pass quickly,
So I can get up again.
This is the most difficult time I've ever had. .... I was so close too.
To achieving something again.
Never again though man.

Getting ready to end your life,
Ain't an easy task.
Everything has to be finalised.
Therex no room for errorx,
There needx to be finalisationx,
Ticks, dotx, T's crossed.
Importantly,
There is no room for a mistake,
Been there, done that.
Wasted my time away,
Day after day ....
**** the government man,
And **** the cuntx who kept my kidx from me .... Hit me harder please.
You ain't taken enough from me.
I have to be happy,
With nothing man.
So hit me as hard as you can.
Hold up ..... The exz and their possiex did a good enough J.O.B.
I can't even enjoy the simple thingx.
**** man.

Not much to write of anymore,
Doorx keep being slammed ......
One by one man ....... I'm a happy man,
Knowing,
Thix is it for life.
Just a quick ride,
Hospitals,
Cross Roadx,
Crossed,
Hit by a truck .........
I'm hoping ....
Lifex better next round,
This one smacked me down.
Still unsure,
What for.
**** hey.
Not my problem,
What happenx in my kidx lives,
They are gone for life.
I'm not hanging back till 65 to see if they feel like talking to me.
Therex WAY to much history.
None of it good.
All **** relationships,
Where I was the worker and house *****,
******* givex me the shitz,
These mother fuckerz wanted to play ****, think I would pay man.
**** that ..... I already owned that.
I set it FREE, thatx
what they wanted C,
But ...... Itx hard not being a one woman show.
......
......
Meh ........... Thatz how it goex.

Crossed Eyex and I'm
Riding high,
No food for a few dayx,
Why?
I'm tied down hard,
Pushing corridors,
To avoid warx,
And keep my
H.E.A.D.
Down.
Waiting the clock down,
Count down.
Face up my handx dealt,
Townx end,
I'm fortune,
To have NO friendx,
Never Again I say man.
**** ..... With the friendx I've had,
I don't need enemies man.
****.
There must be a place thatx got better committed peoplez,
That are EVIL .... And I think to myself,
**** man .... This is way too hard,
Doing on my OWN . Ain't an easy road,
I slow right down again.
Think ..... this is wonderful man,
I have plenty of time to do nothing,
With so much surveillance.
I STILL .    ...     . have no idea why?
Spiex?      Why?     Why so many???
Therez plenty of thingz people could do other than checking on me and what the **** I be doing .....
..... Therex plenty to do,
Without theivex, ratx and snitchex,
******* up my existence.
Bitchex .. Nothing better to do?????
Whoa.
I ain't never seen this **** in my life man. .... . I still wonder what the **** is wrong with people.
And why me.