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 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
girl diffused
Everything in the home is new
She curls her toes against the wooden grain of the floorboards
Rain pelts against the window pane, her fingers flex
The dog moans somewhere beyond the walls
She feels like a phantom, her feet light on every surface
Untraceable, she finds him reclining on the couch
Curled in on himself, eyes, half-lidded
Heavy with sleep, pearled water on his eyelashes
She kisses his cheek, presses her lips against his wet forehead
His eyelids flutter open, his hands pass over the thick hardcover
A poet's book in his hand, pages dog-eared on 352, he opens it
Drowsily reads a poem, her words that she'd written late at night
Dripping from his lips, not mendacious, but holding a deeper truth in his mouth

-

This is where she would end up, in this soft-white-walled home
Everything is new and bright
The cat, curled up on the windowsill, seemingly peering into a divided world
Separated by the gentle pattering of falling rain
Everything outside is gray and cloudless
The computer is on but its light emitted is muted
She seats herself next to him, folds her legs underneath her
His hand grasps hers gently, turns it over, gleaming on her finger is the ring
The quiet and unselfish promise

*

The quiet and unselfish promise
His hand grasps hers gently, turns it over, gleaming on her finger is the ring
She seats herself next to him, folds her legs underneath her
The computer is on but its light emitted is muted
Everything outside is gray and cloudless
Separated by the gentle pattering of falling rain
The cat, curled up on the windowsill, seemingly peering into a divided world
Everything is new and bright
This is where she would end up, in this soft-white-walled home

-

Dripping from his lips, not mendacious, but holding a deeper truth in his mouth
Drowsily reads a poem, her words that she'd written late at night
A book in his hand, pages dog-eared on 352, he opens it
His eyelids flutter open, his hands pass over the thick hardcover
She kisses his cheek, presses her lips against his wet forehead
Heavy with sleep, pearled water on his eyelashes
Curled in on himself, eyes half-lidded
Untraceable, she finds him reclining on the couch
She feels like a phantom, her feet and fingers light on every surface
The dog moans somewhere beyond the walls
Rain pelts against the windowpane, her fingers flex
She curls her toes against the wooden grain of the floorboards
Everything in the home is new
énouement
n. the bittersweetness of having arrived here in the future, where you can finally get the answers to how things turn out in the real world—who your baby sister would become, what your friends would end up doing, where your choices would lead you, exactly when you’d lose the people you took for granted—which is priceless intel that you instinctively want to share with anybody who hadn’t already made the journey, as if there was some part of you who had volunteered to stay behind, who was still stationed at a forgotten outpost somewhere in the past, still eagerly awaiting news from the front.

About this poem - a girl gazes into her future once, then again, in reverse.
 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
Vale Luna
(read forward, then backward, line by line)

I ran.
Not knowing what else to do
There was so much blood on my hands
It was mine
The kitchen knife
Caught in my chest
Guilt
Consumed by
Fear
I was heightened by
Adrenaline
But running on
Wasn’t enough
While trying to stay calm,
Losing control
It was me that would end up
Dead. Because
He was
In front of me
The whole time
It was too late
Trapped
I found myself
Locked in chains
My fate was
Death.
Forward: from the victims perspective.
Backward: from the murderers perspective.

This TOOK ME FOREVER TO WRITE
 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
sar
no. 11
 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
sar
my hair is still wet
  from when i slept
(in) your arms
the night you let the bath run
 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
laura-jessica
i loved him so much,
that i let him crush

my heart

over and
over and
over again.

until there was only nothing left.

but what do you have he even
crushes your

nothing?
 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
Steve Page
I left time at the door
with my shoes and my plans
and I let go of expectation.
I settled down with my mug
of concentrated calm
and I centred myself
on my mother's withered world,
while she continued to rage within.
An aspiration of mine is to be able to selflessly leave myself outside and inhabit my mother's dementia'd world.
again
I’m crashed
against the wall of solitude
again
the flight of waiting
inexorably went down
again
I'm not even worth a no to you
only silence
absence
[ ]
I’m alone in my lonelyness
 Feb 2018 JA S-Mine
Adria
Dear Someone,

As of this moment, I’m writing you a letter without the slightest idea of who you are. Have we met already? Do we bump each other’s way unknowingly? Or are you someone I already know and just waiting for our story to unfold absentmindedly? Tomorrow, a week, a couple of months, or even years I know I will meet you in an unpredictable way and you will finally stay.

Hope still blossoms within my heart even if it got broken a multiple times. I hope you’re having the time of your life so when we meet in the future, I’ll gladly listen to your unending stories about your adventures. I only want you to keep one promise; please be patient while waiting for me. I know fate gives us tough ordeals but keep in mind that we can both do it even if we’re not in each other’s side yet. For now, I want to apologize for not being there with you through your battles. I’m sorry I missed a lot of important days with you. Don’t get me wrong with this, I hope you experience heartbreaks before I step into your life. I believe that it will make you wiser and stronger so when the day comes that I have you in my arms, I will make you the happiest and show you genuine care for the reason that you deserve to feel what real love is supposed to be. It is a tough journey yet this is worth waiting for. You are worth waiting for.

When that day comes, I will love you wholeheartedly, always. I will push you to become a best version of yourself. I will be there for you through your success and downfalls. As what 1 Corinthians 13:7 said; Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I will not give up on your perfectly good soul. I will always believe in your capability. I promise to give you hope and light through the dark times, and we will endure every reckless path in the journey and make it worth the fight.

One day, your voice will be my favorite song. Your eyes will be my favorite painting. Your words will be my favorite poetry. Your presence will be my sweet tranquility. You are the home I keep coming back to. You are my comfort zone and at the same time, the adventure I am willing to take the risk. You are the daydream that I cannot escape. You are the sunshine that brings happiness in my frowning days. You are the laughter and smiles that I will remember in the back of my mind. You will be my greatest serendipity that destiny has given me. You are the evidence in this universe that God, in his timing, truly blesses a perfect prince to His brave princess.

Go on with your life and commit to your own happiness, I would do the same. Let us both keep going until the day we finally meet. I can’t wait to tell you how fortunate I am to be existing the same time as you. Fill yourself with self love and take care of your heart. When the right time comes, I’ll be the one who will nurture and take care of it.

So to the man I will fall in love in the future, everything will be worth the wait. Fate and gravity will eventually lead us to each other’s arms. I’ll see you very soon.

Tout L'amour,
Your sweetest Adrianne.
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