Looking at myself now,
I am not sure that I recognize
any piece of who
I used to be.
Our cells are constantly
replenishing and replacing,
and technically speaking,
I am not at all
the person I once was.
I understand that I
am a collection of my experiences
and that everything I have
done has led me to this moment.
I do not know what has come of
the choices I
made opposing this.
The patches of my skin
that only said yes
when they meant it have
peeled away and are
replaced by the fresh
tissue of compliance.
If I am
the sum of my experiences
then why are there no
scars on my thighs from
the times I smiled?
If I am
the sum of all of my experiences
then why is there
a fracture in my arm from
anger but not from love?
If I am really
the sum of all of my
experiences then
why does my body
only show my regrets?
The bags under my eyes are starting to seem permanent.