Change is not a bad thing
We must change,
Adapt,
Or die

The thing is, we rarely consider
that we cannot stay the same person forever
That evolving is a part of who we are

Our skin sheds to be replaced by new skin,
Change is within us.

Friends will leave to go on their own
and you will do the same

Everybody’s flame must run out
and life will not be the same without them

You will grow, change, forget and your flame will run out.

But how will you be remembered?

Something started feeling wrong
the anticipation turned into what i dread most
anxiety

He walks in my room
with a lost look on his face
right then I knew

He sat on the couch,
He did not kiss me,
He did not touch me.

My hands were shaking
An elephant sat on my chest,
right then I knew
although I wish I didn’t

In a second, the words came out of his mouth
He didn’t want to be with me anymore
I didn’t know I would feel my heart break the way I did
And in silence,
the tears started to slide down my cheeks
It was the heaviest my heart had felt in years
I could not breathe
I heard him
but I didn’t want to

I suddenly heard myself asking;
Was it my fault?
Why am I not good enough?

I wanted to go for a drive
Something familiar to us
Something we shared for a year and half
Laughter, sing alongs
and all kinds of stories

I though maybe in that moment I could change his mind
show him who we are, or at least a part of us
Something that reminds us of our good days

What was I thinking?
I couldn’t tell you.
We talked. I felt myself agreeing.
Did I really?
Not at all

We left on a hug
I thought I was okay.

Bathroom floors are not only for movie scenes
They’re not only for holding your best friend’s hair while trying not to puke over her

Sad echoing phone calls
Stories to laugh about

Hiding from other people with the shower on

Somehow,
We’ll always remember
on those bathroom floors
the tears we shed
and everything that brought us closer

You can know a lot about how a person is living
or has lived by observing their body

It’s not as crazy as you may think,
It shows, if it is well fed or not
If it holds disease
Any signs from smell to a million other things

You can tell a lot about a body,
just by looking at it
Skin problems,
Bone or muscle problems,

You can tell,
if they carry skin problems
bones or muscle

You can tell,
crimes of passion,
from other crimes.

You can tell age,
You can tell how tired they are
if they are
You can tell what they’re feeling
if they’re nervous or happy

You can tell,
if they’re been loved and cherished
and if they have have been
abused and betrayed

There are things we run from
Nightmares
Danger and death

Things we run to,
People
Dreams and ambition

We’ll get tired along the way,
stop for a minute,
enjoy the view.

We all run for different reasons,
At different speeds.
We make the best of what we have
The best of our abilities

We keep running,
Because we look forward to something
No matter how tiring it gets
We’ll keep running
towards the finish line

Coffee keeps you awake
on your feet
It keeps me on my toes
Wide eyed and tired

I become cranky,
It makes my heart race
I don’t like the rush

It makes feel weak
lacking in control

I like to be in control
To have my thoughts together

I like to be calmer
I already have a tornado brewing in me

the ones i love most, scattered around the world.
London, Paris, Dubai, Montreal etc.

the ones left here go through waves of anger and sadness.
their loved ones are scattered around the world.
and they’re looking to join them.

and everybody asks me when my turn is coming, assuming that i’m joking when i say i’m not leaving.

but there’s a simple answer,
i love it here.
it’s my home.
i can’t be think of myself being anywhere else in the world right now.

My biggest fear,
Is not growing old,
Not looking old

Time would have carved my skin
With reminders of its passing
Reminders of the mistakes I’ve made
The falls I’ve recovered from

My biggest fear is forgetting
(Alongside death)
My biggest fear is not recognizing
The faces that made my days beautiful
The faces that made my life a little harder

My biggest fear is not recognizing any achievements or failures

I keep journals,
Struggles and great loves
I’ll make sure I’d remember it all
Or at least try

It’s not just your story,
It’s also every story around you,
love stories or breakups
friendships and heartaches
Adventures and late night phone calls
You could write about anything.
Not your feelings but maybe
Your best friend’s

But we choose writer’s block
Because in our mind,
The idea sounded much better
than the way it looks on paper

And we could write for days,
pages and pages and pages and pages and pages and pages and pages and pages and pages and pages and pages...
and it would feel like the words are insignificant,
like we worked so hard
to say nothing at all,

But the story is there,
Maybe it needs a twist,
A little color,
A coffee break,
A night out on the town.

Maybe it needs a good night of sleep
Maybe it’s about time to stop stressing
Maybe it needs to be written,
left behind,
Maybe it needs to be forgotten about,
Found,
Out of the blue
To be reread, refined,
rethought with a new perspective


We never run out of ideas,
We just question our ability
To make somebody feel something.

To understand something you must go back to its origin.

The root of the tree, not the branches who’ve grown and dispersed.

To find something you’ve lost, trace back your steps.

Repeat them again in your head.

To live in wiser manner, remember the mistakes you’ve made

Because those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it.

To know where cancer came from
Look up that family tree

Because everything has a grandparent
And a great grandparent

And it’s beautiful to look at what’s past and gone
History and yesterdays
The wrinkles on a skin so old,
That tell so much stories of things we know
Things we do
and thing’s we’ll leave behind

there’s no age for heartbreak,
for the feeling that you won’t feel
the feeling you won’t feel the way you felt when you felt what your felt

And by that I mean that feeling is love

There is no age to feel love
Something I’ve felt
Something I’m feeling

For a while I felt numb to the core
Food didn’t taste the same
but that love
this love,
gave me life back
It reminded my heart to beat
loud
very loud
almost out of my chest
it reminded me of the most beautiful sound
the one
of the person you love
saying
i love you