nevaeh: Poems

Dec 2019 · 234

beat

nevaeh Dec 2019

beat

the beat of my music
reminds my heart of its job
and keeps me alive.

this is almost too cliche for me

#music

Dec 2019 · 328

falling off the edge of the earth

nevaeh Dec 2019

falling off the edge of the earth

the world spins so fast
that i'm afraid to blink
in case i lose my footing
and fall away to the end of the universe
without you.

just a quick write

#lose #earth #universe #edge #love

Dec 2019 · 310

mine

nevaeh Dec 2019

mine

His eyes were thick
with unadulterated love
and His arms were a place
that warmth never left.
He is.
yet i could not
call Him
mine.

to want something you will never have

#love #distant #****

Dec 2019 · 151

i **** you

nevaeh Dec 2019

i **** you

you are the only reason i'm here today.
i smile when i think about you.
you make me feel genuinely happy.
i care about you so ******* much it hurts.
i feel all of these things and more.
i feel things i didn't even know existed.
i think i * * * * you.
but i'll never tell.

is it love? or need?

#love #need #****

Dec 2019 · 102

Cinnamon

nevaeh Dec 2019

Cinnamon

it feels like you came with the cold
like suddenly you fell from the windy sky
and warmed me up inside.
i wanted you for your fiery red
before i found myself like an addict,
craving you at the strangest times
for your comfort
and your smell.
i love you without the sugar on top
even bitter and dry and burning my tongue
and coating my throat until i choke
with tears on my cheeks
but could never live without you.
not at all.

Dec 2019 · 91

time

nevaeh Dec 2019

time

it's all we have,
but it never feels like
it's enough.

chasing the hours i have with you.

#time #sad #death #loss

Dec 2019 · 93

underwater

nevaeh Dec 2019

underwater

"hold your breath, sweetie"

with everything around me
muffled and distorted,
slowed and darkened,
to an intoxicating mush
that leaves me breathless;
how can you expect me
not to want this beauty
inside my lungs?

#water #breathe

Dec 2019 · 196

dear ten-year-old me

nevaeh Dec 2019

dear ten-year-old me

look around you,
enjoy the hair clips and lip gloss
those moon-shoes and silly-bands.
too-long legs and frizzy hair
are the worst of your problems now
but it gets a whole lot darker,
and not a thing will stop
when you can't find a candle.

i wish i had been happier when i was a kid. all i wanted was to grow up and be mature. i definitely thought my life was the worst, but maturity kind of ***** and now i just wanna go back.

#growup #nostalgia #sad

Dec 2019 · 150

rat

nevaeh Dec 2019

rat

oh, you fat little thing
does the smell of pine excite you?
perhaps the fog of apples and spice?
oh, dear little rat
it's all just a dream to you,
isn't it?
that corner sure is lovely
and i am sure you know i'm here.
don't worry
i won't hurt you.
a little company is nice on the holidays, after all.

poem for the little rat hiding in the corner of my room.

#rat #friend #holidays

Dec 2019 · 178

pictures

nevaeh Dec 2019

pictures

this tinsel tickles my chin
and makes my arms itch.
i wonder
how long i have to smile
before i throw a rock at this lady's camera
and say **** it
to my christmas card?

i hate taking photos.

#christmas #picture #bored

Dec 2019 · 130

Fireplace

nevaeh Dec 2019

Fireplace

a place to burn
the things that muddle
and mess with your mind
leave them to mix
with the charred remains
of yesterday.
burn it all
until what's left is pure
warm and solid bone
complete without fleshy stress
then continue forward
from the fireplace.

Dec 2019 · 329

oh dear

nevaeh Dec 2019

oh dear

an epidemic
of ghastly proportions

it is the plague
of this era

my sister
will not
shut
up.

Nov 2019 · 161

vain

nevaeh Nov 2019

vain

vanity is a poison
injected at birth
that festers and grows
until the victim is so weak and alone
and separated from reality
that it can devour her whole
and leave her to rot
as a cold, empty, ghost of a woman

#vanity #poison #death

Nov 2019 · 122

ferry man

nevaeh Nov 2019

ferry man

i don't want to die alone.
i crave the touch of another, the feeling of darkness, warmth, security. weight on every inch of my body. a cocoon of some strong, stable arms holding together the pieces of me that want to escape. to disappear.

Nov 2019 · 700

unknown

nevaeh Nov 2019

unknown

unknown i follow you
quietly in the dark
listen to your every word
the sound of L's and S's
slipping off your tongue
the curve of your chin
the edge of your jaw
the slight dip in your temple
the arc of your brow
every detail
in perfect clarity
unknown i cherish it
relish in it, even
until each finite drop has been lapped up
by my guilty, relentless eyes

#love #lonely #stalker

Oct 2019 · 152

my King

nevaeh Oct 2019

my King

and i vow to you we will be
one together, i give you my heart
i share with you my soul
my kiss, my light, my King.

Oct 2019 · 81

trapped

nevaeh Oct 2019

trapped

how did i fall
into such a splendid trap,
that even when you push me away
i feel myself pulled closer.
even when your words become dry and cold
and your your touch even colder
and when the last thing i want is to see your face
i can't stand to see you leave.

Oct 2019 · 116

?

nevaeh Oct 2019

?

i cannot tell if i love you
or if i love the fact
that you love
me

Oct 2019 · 203

stay

nevaeh Oct 2019

stay

scream with me into the abyss
feel with me, such a feeling of bliss
a deeper feeling than desire
a feeling that feels, to me, like a fire
come with me our hearts as one
stay with me til' my days are done
when all light has waned away
i will sing my breath on my final day

#love #stay #feel #fire #desire

Oct 2019 · 166

~

nevaeh Oct 2019

~

I
never
loved
you

~

Oct 2019 · 1.1k

cerebellum

nevaeh Oct 2019

cerebellum

endorphins flood my mind
bubbling up behind my eyes
in vivid blues, greens, and pinks,
setting every nerve on edge
solid pounding through my veins
pushing lava to the surface
lighting it on fire
heating the soft trails
your fingers leave on my skin.

#love #fire #***

Oct 2019 · 223

the King

nevaeh Oct 2019

the King

i don't know how to love you
or if i shouldn't even try.
i don't know how to pull you through
or watch you fall and cry.
i don't know if the world will end
or if i'll ride your throne.
i don't know how to play pretend
or turn you back from stone.
i don't know if you'll be my King
or if i'll fall away.
i don't know if i'll let you sing
or if you'll choose to stay.

#king #love #dontknow #death

Sep 2019 · 254

sticks and stones

nevaeh Sep 2019

sticks and stones

sharper than steel
your words stab me
like a blade
slicing through the night
through my heart
carving out the deepest parts
driving them into the dirt
and every single word
every syllable
dries out my lungs
and leaves me on the ground
crumpled up
like the letters i wrote
and as you walk away
i feel the last whisper of hope
seep from the darkest parts of my soul

"sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can break your heart"

Sep 2019 · 532

blue

nevaeh Sep 2019

blue

lost is blue
like the ocean
and your eyes
deep is love
yet solitary
beautiful
broken

#love #blue #ocean #beautiful

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