My mom thinks I am depressed.
She thinks I'm sad beyond measure.
But I don't think I am.
Yet, sometimes, I think, I might as well be.

After all, since the moment I was born
I'm like the ground
feeling people's steps and weight on my shoulders
( even when they don't walk directly on me.)

I mean, I'm just like the ground
that can't do anything to lift people's worries out of them
They take care of me but I remain floored,
fixed to the idea that I am just me...

a ground
that don't have feet to walk  a  life of its own.

a ground
that don't have hands to build a world to live peacefully.

but then, I think, "No, I'm not a ground.
I'm a human with feet and hand.
I'm a human with a heart and mind.
I'm a human capable of creating a beautiful life"

But then I remember again that I'm depressed,
And I can't stop thinking that I am like the ground:
depressing as I feel people's steps and weight on my shoulders
( even when they don't walk directly on me),
drowning in this depression as I let people's problems rain on me

And I began to depress a lot more...

Until I realize that this depression, has made me gain depth.

the thoughts are not a box of chocolates to be eaten
the thoughts are like drops of water that one after another
accumulate to form rivers

These rivers run amuck with no particular course...

But at times, the thoughts go in search of an ocean

for the biggest of body of water,
they yearn to be one with the ocean

I feel like I am missing something...

Is it you?
or is it poetry?


The strange ache in my chest is coming back again,
and I cannot explain it
but it aches, it burns, as if I had drank alcohol
but ******,
I haven't drink, not even a drop.

I just want to curl up into a ball, turn off the lights of my room, and sleep it off.
I want to hybernate the entire month of December,
I don't want to go out, I want to stay in, I just want to stay in.


There's so much ache, I do not like alcohol.
It intensifies the ache, and I just want to sleep it off.
I want to hold my pillow, I want to sit in one corner, curl up into a ball. I want to go to and fro, to and fro, leaning front and back,
front and back, as if I was listening to waves, going
to and fro, to and fro, calm, tranquil, retreating backwards,
ebbing back into the sun...


But life doesn't let me sleep. It continues awakening me.
It continues calling me. And I just want to sleep the ache,
I want to dream that I live in peace, but my dreams are vast, too vast that even when life calls me, its voice echoes, twice, thrice,
"wake up"


I open my eyes, there's the light...
Life doens't want me to sleep in darkness, it wants me to awake... to open my eyes, to no longer be blinded by it's brightness...

I dreamt I was a bench
where people sat to see:
the sun afar the road
the trees that grew so tall
the sprinkles turning on
the grasses going green
and overall,
dear nature moving them
as I remained unmoved
just standing there
with all their weight
rested only on me.

Someday, I'll be like a volcano
underneath the sea-
immersed in depth
awaiting to erupt with wisdom
And create an island
where people can step on and rest

Like rain that clouds cry
we came to fall from the sky
to be a multitude of drops
that form a tiny little pond

but then as time went by
and as we stood there calm
there came a force
that with a jump
scattered us, splish - splash,
some drops in here,
some drops in there,

just for us to form
two tiny little ponds.

But then as time went by
and as the heat of the day
began to increment
we started to evaporate

to once again be
like rain that clouds cry
to be a multitude of drops
that form a tiny little pond

to then as time goes by
become scattered by a force
to form many tiny little ponds

that then as the heat of the day
begins to increment
we start to evaporate

to once again be
like rain that clouds cry....

If I ever feel the earth tremble,
It would be because love came
to move my world for me

It would feel as if the gates of heaven opened
As the earth quakes and shakes
And as people stop their madness
To see the brightest of the lights meet their eyes

Imagine all gathered up in circles, hand in hand,
Like a human chain, standing around heavens gates.
All prepared to meet the judgement day
Together, supporting each other, helping one another,
Not letting a single one end up in Hell.