It was easier for him
to refer to me as 'she'
To avoid the streets I walk in
and to never drink tea
To avoid eye contact
and throw away his key
To make new friends
who are not friends with me
To convince himself
that I'm erased from his memory
To throw away the plants
and cut down the tree
To drop everything
and - just like that - flee
He doesn't know it yet,
but that doesn't help
He thinks he is forgetting me
but he is remembering-
he is remembering to forget me
and memory doesn't work this way
As much as it pains me to say,
- make new memories in the streets we walked in
- and associate tea with food, not me
- water the plants so they would grow, as can we
- look me in the eye and remind yourself, I am not the me I used to be, that you used to see
- repeat my name over and over, until you feel nothing
- keep your key because I changed the locks
- meet up with our friends, and hear my news- and wish the best for me
I wish the tear on my cheek was because I am cutting onions,
as I am preparing your favorite meal,
but it isn't
I hope you'll associate me with goodness,
and smile when you're 80 as you remember me