your hair,
i love running my hands through it
while you hold me.
your skin,
so soft to the touch.
your eyes,
i get lost in them everytime you look my way.
your smile,
i could see everyday for hours.
your laugh,
it's my favorite song.
you,
the one i love.

You're like a shadow,
you stayed during our brightest times
and left during the darkest ones.
You didn't leave with a warning,
whoosh!
and you were gone.
You acted like we never happened.
Like you didn't even know who I was.
You threw me away
and stomped on the heart I gave you.
You were my world,
but I was just a cover up for her..
the girl across the room.
You laughed at my tears.
What happened to the person
I fell in love with?

have you ever considered
how your words make me feel?
often times,
i have late night cries.
and your words feel so real.
dry eyes
after bad times.
don't ever even take a moment to consider
that your words hurt me so bad.
you're killing someone's sister.
don't you dare tell me,
"my words were just a joke."
when your words make certain people
want to cry and choke.
so don't tell me I'm crying for no reason.

i have no sanity anymore.
none.
instead, I'm fighting a civil war.
it can't be won.
i can't seem to vent to you.
why should i come to anyone?
why would i come to anyone..
if instead i can just take out my knife..
i hope and pray that maybe someday
my name will no longer mean life.
staying alive is harder than ever now.
oh, i would definitely go to you..
if i knew how.
so instead i just sit here,
waiting on the day..
the day that i'll come to you
with knowledge of the right words to say.

it's 2:36 a.m.
and falling asleep is no longer an option for me.
how am i supposed to fall asleep when everytime i close my eyes,
you're all i can see?
i'm okay with this, though.
this way, my thoughts are full of you.
but every second of the way,
missing you is all i can do.
i hate that you're asleep now.
because it means i can't hear your voice,
only the replay of yesterday in my head.
but i'd prefer for you to be in my bed right now,
i'll be ontop of you instead.
promise me that you'll never forget me,
nor dare to let me go.
for holding you and kissing you
is all that i'll ever know.

"get over it," they say.
"you're full of it," they say.
"being happy is a choice."
we can only wish it were that way.
we cry each and everyday,
you're just never there to see.
you said you'd always be here,
that's just how it used to be.
you made her biggest nightmare come true,
and it was losing you.

at night i am the side of me
the side of me that they don't see.
the side of me that's broken as can be.
at night, i see the shadow
the shadow of a scary tree.
now all that scares me are my thoughts
thoughts **** worse than humans do.
depression is caused by just a few.
just a few
thoughts
fights
people
nights
knifes.
look in her eyes.
she's dying inside.