I'm as important as necessary
as important as I let myself be
but necessary isn't necessarily
the right way to go about wanting

cool noon breeze, sweet scent that stings
a cushioned step for hardened feet
whereas the place heart & mind meet
i've long loitered that corner on the streets

senses that sting and a mind that sings
in madness, sadness, delusions and things
adhering to horrid truth in meaning
abstaining from animalistic need

though greed feeds on what it needs
in between the solid blurred lines it reads
that time is a vision pain is a choice
there's grace in sorrow & reason yet to rejoice

i sit now in stillness and wanting and need
love as a shadow to mask my greed
tormented by want, of things far away
still I long for virtue and truth in the day

don't bother, just break down
make it easy on yourself

flow into nothing
become nothing
identify with none
long for no one

it won't do you any good

in no immense amount of time
i've reappeared at the farthest
point from the finish line

the sky is cloudier than before

the wind that was once at my back
now stings my face without pity

the universe is without remorse
there is no room for that in what
is, what truly is and all that isn't

you will love just to lose
you're either doing one or the other
your friends are there to remind
you of what you can't do
of who you're doomed to become
or more realistically, fall
short of even remotely becoming

you learn to see it as a sadistic blessing
but it becomes complicated when
you crave that pain, when you need it

you attach to what
you know you must denounce

& the sting of exposed humanity
when realized it's all for naught

is a wonderful thing

embrace insignificance, for it's where you really stand
embrace solitude, you're doomed to it by sun and moon
embrace loss, it is more natural than the need to breathe

they are all wonderful things

and like all wonderful things

they do not exist

& i long to feel so wonderful

overcast skies, things
get cloudy sometime
as you wiped counter & dish
and the disdain from my eye

womanly, inviting
incredibly exciting to see
you do what comes
naturally as you be

I'm a dog on a leash
without a bone or
a home, all that I've known
has long been outgrown

by those who have lived
by those who have died
to those who have given
& all of us who have lied

the sun and the moon
nature and worldly things
the supernatural, even
the pleasure that stings

but it all comes together
in sickened passing glance
it is brushes of body
in mirrored stance

I am losing will
with considerable force
but I'm feeling so many
different things

this is to be human
this is to be three dimensional
this is to be
this is to be nothing at all

next time I am wanting
to be long gone and forgotten
stick around &
do your haunting
I will not bother you

happiness has never stopped me
from still suffering so slowly
it's pain, I guess,
I'm wanting
but it will not follow you

it's only mine to keep
within my own arm's reach
yet still while
you sleep, you
they will be wrapped around

my innards now are burning
with past and future yearning
but my body
now is floating
my feet are off the ground

my senses are tingling
my spirit is vibrating
and my smile,
that's the main thing,
it's not ironic at all

horrors may still follow
all those promising tomorrows
wrapped up in
comfortable sorrow
I have embraced the fall

in the morning
when i told you
that i want you
and needed you

i'm not sure what i meant by that

something
takes over
in the wake of
past lovers

i just want you here

meanings
and feelings
sure signs
and readings

lead my mind along the way

arms wide
heart closed off
your crooked smile
my smoker's cough

we are sure set to tragedy

i'll press on
and fret not
with blind eye
& muted thought

it's what soothes the mind, at times

there's no shame
in wanting
what's so pure
and haunting

flooding now the world around

in rose tinted
perfumed
oceans of the
blood spewed

from the people you became

when you got in your own way