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you are too young
to hear such things
yet they spew from my mouth
as i spit poisoned blood
snatched from my lungs and ripped from others' throats

i reek of acid
it breaks me to know it tears through you
slicing deeper than the silver blade i use
to carve myself to a shape i think might be better
though you would never admit the pain
at least, not to me

i say you should abandon me
you say i have no right to claim order or jade
and i'm not
i just know the truthful why
are you blind or do you refuse to see?

i am the nightmare
the fear that flares in the back of minds
the shadow haunting every eye
when it retreats to safety from the misery and torture of the world

i am
the pain that blinds
the blood that chokes
and
the breath that was never exhaled

i need you to understand
to see the horror i embody
so you know to run
so i can't hurt you
so i can't hurt me

clawing at shards of shattered knives
i desperately try to force your sight

yet i cannot keep pushing all this at you
all of me as myself
this ******* monster
i know i am
 Jul 2014 stacey renei
Cristina
there are different types of crying
each of us has at least one or two
and from my point of view
the most used is the one without tears,
when the soul cries loud and everything in the body hurts.
and there is another one that goes hand in hand with rain
you're between droplets, crying and nobody can see the tears.
 Jul 2014 stacey renei
JT
4:28
 Jul 2014 stacey renei
JT
4 years
2 months
28 minutes
and 39 seconds

Its 4:28 am
and I know
that I don't love you
anymore

-j.t.
 Jul 2014 stacey renei
firexscape
You flooded me with false hope
And left me drowning in feelings
Thinking about how you and I
Could've been a we
With your lingering touches
You sparked lightning in my heart
And now it dances in my veins
Refusing to stop.
But you dont care that you are in my bloodstream
Because baby, I could light up the skies for you
And you wouldn't care to look.
Never trust a white man,
Never **** a Jew,
Never sign a contract,
Never rent a pew.
Don't enlist in armies;
Nor marry many wives;
Never write for magazines;
Never scratch your hives.
Always put paper on the seat,
Don't believe in wars,
Keep yourself both clean and neat,
Never marry ******.
Never pay a blackmailer,
Never go to law,
Never trust a publisher,
Or you'll sleep on straw.
All your friends will leave you
All your friends will die
So lead a clean and wholesome life
And join them in the sky.
 Jun 2014 stacey renei
Diana
Tell Me
 Jun 2014 stacey renei
Diana
Tell me:

When did blowing bubbles
Turn into blowing smoke?

When did soda
Turn into *****?

When did pool parties
Turn into late-night skinny dipping?

When did Smarties
Turn into hydros?

When did sneakers
Turn into high heals?

When did cheek kisses
Turn into ***?

When did juice boxes
Turn into cheap beer?

When did bikes
Turn into cars?

Tell me:

When did growing up
Turn into this?
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