Poetry is found in the incoherent thoughts.
like a needle jumping across boundaries (grooves)
a wave pattern, synonymous with the beat of my heart.

in a mud pit.
around my ankles, saddled,
slowly advancing.
Moving is a lot of effort.
tired, I just want to lie yet
and let me sink.
low,
low,
low.
more into this swamp.
my body becomes numb.
extreme pressures,
now around my ribs
suppress breathing attempts.
this mist fills my brain and,
I cannot even whisper...

She, her,
Triggering a cascade
Of suicidal thoughts.
I am not enough.

Her tongue rolls                                    
    tipped with paint                              
the strokes she speaks                
forming living colors      
    
                                hot lava

         melts me to my core            
                
                            dripping                            ­  

                       from the corners of her mouth                    

                                    watered with her kisses                    
           The seeds she whispers          
                                 bloom inside my chest                                                  
           vines wrapped around my heart

A door stood closed to me.
I knocked; no answer.
You gave me the key
Then forbid my entrance.

–          –          –

I was dying of thirst
You poured me a glass
But forbid me to drink
    
–          –          –

How can you act surprised, that I persisted?
How can you claim betrayal?
Why would you lead me on-
only to take away my hope?
What you are is cruel.

Infinity is contained in a decimal.
Time speeds by,
and yet a moment can last forever.
The infinite within the finite.
There are a billion possibilities within you.

You read cheeper by the dozen once
and fell in love with a red head.
Now there are twelve of us.
Are you happy?
Is this what you really wanted?

I can't say childhood has been great,
knowing all you are is a number...
"hello I'm number 7"
lucky me.

They weren't ready for us.
I think dad hated me.
The neighbor next door seems nice.
He was the old grandfatherly type,

At least until he had you groomed...
Once he revealed his taste for children
it seemed too convenient for a little pig
to live next door to the big bad wolf.

Dad said I should have known better.
He told me that the wolf was
"too kind to a kid like you"
and that he
"gave out too much candy."
I should have known.
No one is ever that kind or sweet...

We moved,
and just kept moving.
Only ever a year in one spot.
I never made friends.
I had too many secrets,
and I was scared
they'd find out.

At 17 I got away.
And the secrets started slipping.
I was too tired to carry them anymore.
There wasn't anything to lose at this point anyway...


L
G
B
T
and a dash of
s
u
i
c
i
d
e
They say I'm hell bound...
Sounds like fun.
At least I'll get to live before I die.

baby yellow rays of sun
fresh from sleep they wake
and shine softly upon
the crusted snow
crystals crunch beneath my boots
like a crème brûlée

the little odds that i hold dear
keep me hanging on.
the piece of hair tucked behind your ear,
and dancing to our favorite song.
the tenderness in the corner of your lips,
when a smile creeps onto your face.
the feeling of our touching hips,
when locked in tight embrace.
those nights with you under the stars,
or in the early morning air.
the things that keep me going are
the times with you my dear.

wee spinning spider
her webbing the line of time
laced with dew like pearls
the world magnified in spheres
I am caught in the beauty

Rock, tall, edged,
and slightly warn by the sun,
forms it's curve around the bank like a gentle hug.
This layer of privacy from the rest of the ocean.
This our own escape from the rest of the world.
I would watch you from the shore,
as you'd jump with the waves,
feeling the sand hot between my toes.
And you beckoning me to join.
You'd claim to be a king,
asserting your dominance over the sea.
I couldn't help but laugh when the waters overthrew you.
The hours we spent there, seem so distant now...
I miss laughing on the beach with you,
and all the sunsets we watched.
What became of our little swimming cove?

Two faced,
You have no side.
Look in my eyes and tell me you care.
But that's just words...
Words, the tools of deception.
Use one to my face,
And another to my back.
Which of your words are sincere?