I felt for the first time
when she left
by then way too late
alone in a motel room  at twelve  midnight
with the neon bar sign outside glowing
the traffic of the bypass
almost singing  a woeful tune a full
ashtray an ember burning my careless
fingertips
tomorrow
and hope so *******  long past
my beard growing  every second grayer
an inch
itching it's way through
like despair
on an express train
to nowhere
again

We are but scorched women
Giving away pieces of our worn,
Paper hearts
Only to watch them burn with daydreams never lived
Crying tears of soot
Leaving trails of black
on once rosey cheeks
Our kisses, but ash
Painted red smiles
our masks
Souls of ebony,
traced with scarlet
We sing unheard songs
of glowing embers
Falling on deaf ears
Hearts not to be held
or touched
Ash falls apart with the softest breath

Scorched Women

.
How I wish I could lay my head
down gently on your thighs,
to make you moan and sigh aloud
and slowly close your eyes.

How I wish I could use my tongue
and give you more than rhyme,
to bring a flush up to your cheek,
of feelings beyond space and time.

How I wish that I could speak
in words of feathered certainty
and so entice your curious mind
to lay down with me for eternity.
.
.
© Pagan Paul (2017)

I am in a prison
Prison of my mind
Somebody , help me
Rescue me from myself
My mind love playing games
Have various ways to torture me
It takes me to the depths of emotions
Play with each and every vulnerability
And I do not know how to protect my self

Stella said," Momma, I want a jump castle for my friends at my birthday, and daddy."
But daddy won't be there
"Momma, I hate court. That judger is a meanie weanie."
I know baby, shhh
"Can I have a jump castle?"
You'll have your castle, now hush
Stella sais," Momma, why don't daddy like me?"
He does baby
"Why won't he look at me?"
I don't know, princess, daddy is sick
"He needs a doctor and a sucker and a shot."
Yes baby, shush
She said,"Momma, why did daddy hurt you, like the tangles hurt my hairs?"
I don't know baby