Sat there, while it was pouring
Was drenched, but he was grinning
For he was able to provide shelter to the abandoned "pets"
While he himself was homeless.

Writing is the drug,
anxiety is the withdrawal,
talking is the rehab,
and being told I'm wrong is the relapse.

New decade is coming along,
but it feels all wrong.
I feel all my memories pass by,
remembering the nights all I did was cry.
Knowing what it took to get to this,
looking through and being able to reminisce.
2020 is said to be mine,
redefine and realign.
Endings are sad,
beginning are scary,
there's no rhyme,
because sometimes life is confusing.

You asked
What is the scariest part?

I answer
The scariest part
is not the feeling of loneliness
or the darkness that fills you
despite the looming pain
of emptiness

The scariest part
is the realization  
that you have lost yourself
completely
sinking in as you lay awake
at 2 AM
because you lost the ability to sleep
and you can't even cry
because you don't even care

Now were friends with history,
the worst type,
friends that were meant to be so much more.