standing in the
exit
that leads to my rooftop
door slightly ajar
there is a tornado
of wind and snow and
smoke from little
chimneys
twisting in the skies

one brave *******
of a bird
flies
through it

i am drinking chai tea
smoking a cigarette
wearing
fluffy tiger-printed
slippers
sirens wail
tires screech
off the highway
this early morning
and i am warm

this life is but a loan
what remains
is to care for it
as our own
until time calls back
its due date

there are days the melodies
rise from opening
earth
and wrap themselves
around the branches
of trees
blossoming
wet lavender
petals
they drip down
note by note
fall into and
return
to the earth
again

looking down a city
street
you tumble
into the memories
of cradling sunsets
cradling arms and bodies
of past romances

those are the days i know
i couldn't help loving you

i loved you like the champion
the beggar
the defender
the gambler
the martyr
i loved you
with the sun-stricken craze
of a woman
who knew not
what else to do

but give it all
like she was meant to

the night air humming
and the warm wind
grazing my
skin
the streetlights buzz
like fireflies
whirling around me
the moon hangs
superbly
at the end of a downhill
boulevard-
orange, fired
giant
and aliened

the day never died
the moon robbed
the sun
and my love
waits for me
in silence
on a park bench
tonight

I am he that aches with amorous love;
Does the earth gravitate? Does not all matter, aching, attract all matter?
So the Body of me, to all I meet, or know.

that’s you
pointing to the stereo playing Bruce Springsteen
then pointing to me
you’re going to
explode one day

i cried and shook
my insides contracted
and released
sitting in a corner
of the kitchen
i asked you to turn
the music
off, but you had
something to prove

you’re going to explode
one day*
you said again
and finally i stopped the
crying and looked up to
you and my face
let you know

i will explode one day
and you will not be
there
to see it
you’re going to miss the show
and there will never be
anything else like it
something that was once yours
will no longer be
but it will continue
going, building strength
and power
till it erupts
and the sight of
the smog sky, the ******
sun
will not be yours
but another man’s

you understood and
left me in the corner,
alone and longing for
that day

some days it gets so restless inside me,
i cannot breathe new air
i am vacuum sealed
there is only tossing and turning in tight space
you gnaw in me, demon man.

the sorrows of lost love always serve as the muse.
i want to
write about something good, something fresh
and beautiful
but some days it gets so restless i could pull my thick hair out
and drink myself sick and burn my skin and parade
the streets in fierce strides as a torn thing
what is this pain?
i imagined it as a kid and materialized it to reality.
why does it hurt so much, i asked, to fall in love?

this has been a deep slice
the answer bleeds warmer
you are getting there
closer
the knife pierces
the truth rushes  free
yes,
here it comes

friday nights no longer
have their after-glow
the buzzing silver light
guiding me to you
to the beers
to a place like home
warm, naked
entangled in your
bed

friday nights end
flat-lined, alone
the work shift over
at midnight
my muscles quake
my spirit rumbles for
something more
than this.
the streets
holler and i ignore and
sit in the cold
smoking a cigarette
with the smelly, crazy-eyed
bums
in the shelter
waiting for the bus
which will bring me
to the place i sleep

but i have no home