And though my face,
be it smiling,
presents an air of control,
I fear that I have lost it all.

And I brace myself,
for I predict that I will be buried
beneath the rubble,
beneath this teetering construct
that I have haphazardly built in my short,
short,
life.

And I have tried,
I have tried to forget that I built
this homeless house of mine.

And I have thrived,
I have thrived in my ignorance
once upon too many times,

and I shudder at the thought
that the "all" which I am destined to lose,
is really nothing.

Nothing at all.

Have I woken to find
myself surrounded by
such stars?

Plans have gone and changed, I'm
off and away regardless, couldn't
care more about this vagabond desire, I'll
burn the laughter down and run right out
of town, not stopping ahead for a yellow like
an eight-sided rule anymore, you've lifted
the unknowing latch and I'm out, I'm
out out
out.

That little heart shaped from green?
                         as I am.
         love formed with time and care, growing
     stronger and more vibrant every second,
            
               immortalized
                    there with you.

I wish we could be genuine.
Touch our hearts with our fingers and hold them up to the light.
Paint murals where the shadows once dreamt.

I wish we could be bold again.
Scream with the intensity we did when we were born.
Find what we desire, and pursue at all cost.

I wish I could be broken.
Set fire to this barrier wrapping my limbs and chisel into the bone.
Mine what I know lies deep within.

I wish we could be genuine.
Flush our faces with insecurities and hold more than each other's skin.
Let our tears and our laughter mean what they meant.

Is it safe to assume I'm forgotten?

Is it safe to
assume this feeling will pass if I
only go to sleep and dream it
away?

It is safe, now
close your eyes.

Courage
                    born free like a summer breeze, free
                    to twist about and meddle with all
                       sorts of inspiration

that warning light isn't right (been
      meaning to have it fixed), but
              if you insist (your
          tank's quite full)

       here,

             take some of mine.

“I don’t believe in love”
She says

As I speed through a yellow light
She presses her first ******* to her lips
Then touches the roof of my car with them
She shuts her eyes

I don’t ask her why
I just trust her intentions

In the same way I don’t believe in anything myself
Save for the passion that takes hold of others
When they believe

I like what that looks like

The word believe when broken down
First means to live
“Be” means to exist as
Or to live

And “Lieve” means love
And I think about the bravery it takes
To believe in anything
And the bravery it takes to love
And how that same bravery is made by love

How many stupid things have we done
Just by loving someone?

How many arguments are there against a belief
In anything?

I don’t believe in god
But I believe in you

When I watch you do things
Like superstitious knee **** reactions
To keep the light yellow a little longer

So on the ride home I do the same thing
As the sun bends it’s yellow into red over a horizon
That is kissing our sunburnt necks

Because I want this car ride to last a little longer

Even though we say nothing
And you don’t ask why for the last fifteen minutes
I’ve had my fingers pressed to the roof of my car
A satisfied smile pressing back my cheeks

You just trust that I feel this means something

So maybe you don’t believe in love
But you believe in something
And by doing so
You are partaking in love on some weird level
Subconsciously
Like breathing

But I want this car ride to last a little longer
So I say nothing
Let the wind **** the silence like white-noise
It’s as close to prayer
As either of us
Will ever get