and here i am again
at the intersection
of pedestrian language
& old wives tales
swallowing gum
like 7 year memories
opening umbrellas inside
cause i can't seem get away
from all of this rain
i ******* with my left hand
cause i was told
back in highschool that
"it feels like someone else is doing it"
it gets me wondering
about the difference between
losing you and finding out
that some one else found you
or my sleep
or lack thereof
its starting to tear me apart
i keep having this dream
where you are in
an unfamiliar body of water
trying to wash my poetry
off of your hands
or the one where
something happens in my chest
every time you sit
on someone else's bed
i'm tired of feeling like something you've misplaced
but don't have the heart
to look for anymore
tired of you saying my name
like you're trying to bury it
i'm tired of wondering
if you can tell the difference
between the absence
of my voice & silence
the other day
i almost started sobbing
at work when a woman
asked me about
our equipment
i was explaining how
things come apart
and almost mentioned your name
it made me think
of how you used to say
things like "what would you do
if i showed up on your doorstep
one day?" now, i haunt
the windows in my house
i don't leave for weeks at a time
i sit on the porch like the dog
you didn't shoot behind the shed
the one that refuses to die
until you come home again
i told somebody once, that
you didn't even know
what my voicemail sounded like
i wonder if they thought
it was because you
are so important that i never
let it ring that many times
before picking up
or if you dont know
what it sounds like
because you've never called
you can't be the ****** weapon
and the search party
i'm tired of all the seats
to the ferris wheel in my chest
being empty
tired of your voice
being the one i look for
in abandoned places
that one sound i beg
to bounce back
down vacant hallways
i just seem to stand there
in all of that quiet
like someone looking for a mistake
on an eviction notice
so i guess the hardest part
isn't letting go
it's forgetting
you ever had a grip
in the first place
and since you've been gone
i wonder if when
you pushed yourself away from me
you used your left hand
so it felt like someone else did it

They tell me

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
but I hate you.
Walking under a ladder is bad for the soul
but I like to.
Don't break a mirror you'll have bad luck
I broke them all so I could no longer see.
Don't do drugs
Why?
I was hoping it would **** this monster
in my bloodstream.
Don't inject
I'm dependent on everything else.

Don't cry
but I don't paint my face.

there are stars in the sky
and i can choose tell you about them
or i can choose to tell them all about you

If love can be withdrawn
It never was

My love for you is not a gift
    To you
      It is a gift
        To me

I spent the month of November living in the spine of a whale that washed up on shore
The only thing that kept me sane was the sound of the waves rolling across the beach
And only because it sounded like my fingers trailing across your bare skin or your lips against mine
I kept a fire burning just to stay warm
It laughed at me the whole time I sat across from it shivering
And it reminded me of how you would always laugh at me when I couldn’t keep myself from shaking
I hope your muscles are thinning out and the tremors haunt you now
There was an old lighthouse a few miles up the shore where I spent most of my time
I think the light at the top had a faulty connection somewhere
Because it flickered off and on at what seemed like irregular intervals
Truth is it reminded me of the way you used to smile at me
There must be a faulty connection somewhere among your synapses too
*~W.C.

he has
eyes like the ocean
hair like the sand
and a smile like the view
(which takes my breath away)

Common *** for common man
Leave passion for the poet

I ought to make things right before I leave;
Says it's not right leaving without a goodbye;
Yet I find he's always been the one leaving;
And his absence becomes more excruciating each time;
So, where's the right in that?