Serpahim heart
Stitched by glass;
Broken so easily.

©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry

since you have left, i've been doing some sorrowing;
quite a lot of sorrowing, it seems.
morning sorrowing, evening sorrowing,
all in tune with the sound of the rain.
you brought me pain- even
when you were here, you did.
but it's such a shame
i can't have that old pain anymore,
this new pain being such a bore.

(n.)*: the length of silence elapsed after quietly saying, *"Please don't leave"

This one's for the rebels and outcasts,
The Kubricks and Kerouacs.
This one's for the lovers,
And the poets undercover.
We'll run, run away
To a brand new day,
With no rules to obey,
Far from all those shades of grey.
So come dear,
Abandon all your fear,
Our future will be so clear,
When we live as cavaliers.
We'll lead a mutiny,
Until we're living free,
Away from all the scrutiny,
We'll run dear, just you and me.
So come dear,
Abandon all your fear,
Our future will be so clear,
When we live as cavaliers.
So all hail the outlaws,
Come on and join their cause.
All hail the cavaliers,
Living free as fear.

If I wrote it in blood,
would it mean more?

The picture of you is getting worn out,
I bring it everywhere,
My back right pocket is where you are,
always.
It’s the only way I can think of
To have you be a constant part of my life.

It’s not supposed to be this way,
You’re supposed to be there for me,
always.
You shouldn’t have been ripped away from me like this,
All it’s done is bring me pain.
Mommy, the one thing I can never call you to your face.
Calling you by your name,
is what brings me the most pain.

I wish you knew that I loved you,
I wish you knew that if I could be with you,
I would.
I would do anything for you,
anything at all.
I wish you knew that everyday I cry over you,
and every night in my dreams,
I do to.
There is not a second of the day I’m not thinking of you,
no matter how hard I try, you always creep back into my mind.

I do what I do to make you proud,
I do what I do hoping you will approve.
I do what I do because I love you,
and don’t want you to think anything less of me.

I sit here all day,
And wonder,
what my life would be,
if you had stayed.
How it would be different,
How it would be the same.
I go through everyday,
Wondering what it would be like,
Imagining what it could be like,
Imagining the person I could have been.
I wonder how you would be different,
How Daddy would be different.
I wonder everything.

I wonder if you had a time machine,
and you could go back to the start,
and erase what you had done,
if you would.
Erase me from your mind,
erase me from your soul.

Those other kids don’t know what it’s like,
to be ripped away at such a young age,
to be taken from the only thing you know,
to be taken from the only thing you love,
And placed in the hands of someone else,
who doesn’t move the same,
sound the same,
feel the same.
The pain doesn’t end,
and I can’t stop the wondering.

The tears stream down my face,
I’ve lost something I can never replace.
The tears drip on the picture of you,
smearing the ink.

Momma I miss you,
Momma I love you,
Momma I need you,
Momma why don’t I get to have you?

He's on the shore
I'm beneath the sand
He has my heart
Beat in his hand.


-- Eleanor

I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone.
But if you must go,
If you want to go, I want you to know
That it's okay.
It's okay.


-- Eleanor

People fall in love
To feel alive.

But you,
You were my early death.


-- Eleanor