The masked man would come to my window
but never crossed the grill to be inside
he seemed to fly while talking of tomorrow
what he spoke took me on a dark ride!

I see you child progressing to be a man
moving places running races knowing need
reaching farthest far and beyond till the span
feels too long and you’re weary of the speed!

I see you child going on a long trek
falling down getting up roaming wild
find a heart make a home and then break
in that wilderness sob like a child!

I see you child wide awake in the night
burning for pride hollow vain
while flickers out the last candlelight
darkness drowns the gathered gain!

As my fever weighs heavy on eyes sleepless
the dawn seems mercilessly slow
I know what he meant by a child’s progress
the masked man that came to my window!

"It's gonna be OK"
How do you know?
Have you ever felt this way?

"Stay Strong"
For much longer?
It's already been so long...

"You'll survive"
But I'm losing motivation
I don't have the will or drive...

"It will pass"
Possibly... But..
How long is it gonna last?

"There's always tomorrow"
You don't know that
Tonight could be the night I decide to go...

"You'll find someone to love you"
But I'm lonely now,
I need help to make it through

"You're resilient"
Maybe...
But I could still use a friend...

"I understand"
No, you don't
Please don't ever say that
You really have no clue
About all the things I'm going through

"I know you're sad, just try to think positive"
I positively think my mind's destructive

"You can handle it"
What if I don't want to?
What if I don't want hurt again?
What if this is the end?

"You'll figure it all out"
And if I don't...
Will you be there when I go down?
Help me up from off the ground?

"I'm here for you"*
Yea...  
Thanks...  
Me too...

In the wispy glow of dusk
he came

mazing through years of husk
memory groped his name.

Then I remembered.

Though drew us apart fate
once we were very close

inseparable classmate!

Seemed so empty
even an hour without him
more together more the happy
we bonded too in dream.

Shared we two
same liking and taste
loved to do
living without the rest.

I have come to close a deal
in his eyes was sadness spread
hope you remember still
the promise we made.

I remembered.

when we last met
he said

*let’s seal this with trust
must come to meet his heart’s pal
the one departing first.

I cannot say
     I did not know...
It was absolute,
     fall,
into the letters
     call....
me when it
     all gets better.
It was  
   no illusion....
or, what
     was felt
is better....
      then,
               fall
again,
            into
my arms,
            tonight.

The clock's ticking
ticking, ticking
a reminder that
we all must die

It's subtle tocking
subconsciously telling its tale;
live for today, for tomorrow
may be a hollow dream

I choose to live rather than to hasten death
feeling comfort in knowing that I do so to the fullest,
not storing empty promises, or
stacking lie upon lie

We live in moments, only fractions at a time
these moments come and go
teaching us that all things are temporal
and all things come with a shelf life

*even gods

Is this what I've become?
This twisted thing in prison,
shackled to a leather chair and a computer
typing out god knows what
at 2:44 in the morning?

Is this really what I am?
This child weeping in a corner
pretending to be a man
screaming at shadows
and bleeding nothing but sand?

No.

I am not an animal in a cage,
and I am not an empty shell
scouring the world in search
of other souls to fill some hell.

I dreamed I fought Buddah
Again. The fat ******* was a
Slippery one, but not as
Heavy as you'd think.

He laughed with every punch
I landed. So disarming, it
Bordered on cheating.
When he finally tapped out,

I lost. I crossed swords with
Christ some nights ago.
A testament to surrender.
Flat slaps against a thousand

Cheeks, I guess crosses and books
Of poetry -alike- are made from
Wood. I'm the son of a carpenter
Too, I yelled. But it was Mary who

Had a little lamb. I formed a spear
With my hand and drank the
Water it revealed; thirsty as sand.
Like fighting a holy ghost. Air.

I punched at unbreakable mirrors.
I gave up faiths I never had.
Then Odin came up from behind.
Took out my left eye and prepared

To render Blood Eagle, dagger in
Hand, coil of Man; as mortal as any.
We whispered in unison: Finally
A fight worth ending.

Nothing is
Holier
Than
Flesh.

So many times, she had fallen down
as each blow sent her to the ground
She swallowed the blood from her lips
while mentally tallying her chips

As each verbal knife serrated her heart
she managed to save just a small part
and tucked it away beneath her soul
knowing it was needed to make her whole

She kissed lips that poisoned her mind
digging fingernails into hips not so kind
Alternating between Heaven and Hell
the music changed, and she could tell

By the slow cadance of a sultry beat
and the true meaning of passions heat
she took steps that were just a chance
She finally learnt she knew how to dance

I'm not really who I pretend to be
I'm not really angry at other people
I'm more angry at me.
It's just easier to reflect on them
as they are defenceless,
though it seems senseless
for them to be the object of my ire
while they sit patiently, waiting
to be object of my desire
It's simply easier for me to paint them
in water colours
that drip upon a canvas
that can't absorb it
than it is to mar the canvas of my life
with Oils, that appear more solid.