Every day has a victor.
whether or not the victor of days past has been you is irrelevant now
because i have seen it.
today is yours.

nobody else knows it yet,
because you have to show them.
you must fight for your victories, as with everything else
and you have a reason to
because today is yours.

they will try to take it from you
you will be oppressed with the mundane
but look to the horizon and see your crest
flying atop the banner of the sunset.

forget your undoing. you are invincible.
fight for it. thirst for it.
i can see it in you.
this day is yours.

Here I sit
Head in hand
Feeling so alone

I hate that day
The anniversary
Of the terror I felt

Please make it go away
Just take away the past
Because I want to forget

Those ******* caused this
They did this thing to me
They don't suffer like I do

The 24th of July is coming
And I want to hide away
To break down and cry

Then, when I come here
When I write my words
I know I am among friends

Digression from stars, digression from home
Once near and now far
Rain has impregnated soil with smell of distance
Once I drowned in your eyes
Nevermore…

Children on the road, game rings through the sky
Once love, now not even hate
Sun warmed asphalt of desert cities
Once I was beginner, now I’m loser
Nevermore…

Love in dog’s eye, divine unconditionality
Once existence and now nothing
Wind carried in waves of sorrow
Once I believed in dreams
Nevermore…

I

i am so much smaller than you
and i can ever
                            believe...
and you are so much smaller
than you and
i know.

i sit within the winds,
those summer breezes,
some gusty gales, perhaps,
feeling
'the tug
               and toss
of its fabulous force
     rippling
     churning
combing the thinning grey hair on my tired head,
my clothing,
                          so indistinct,
flapping,
                  furling,
floating, --filled with this seen-un-seen presence,
     and i know

a am so small,
and my life so
ludicrous,
like the air
that comes
                      and goes
out of its own control,
but,
                                               i am too small,
and unable
to stop this, its invisible assault.

II


when i am a-float upon
the great lakes, the oceans
the
      rolling
                    rivers
i live
like a tiny slab of flotsam or
     driftwood
sailing
             slowly,
circularly,
(oh-so!) quietly
                                running,
reeling the peeling painted oars of my boat
against
the grainy flashing surface of the waters
                                 rumbling,
                                                                                  rolling
                                                                                       away
this insatiable yearning
to go wherever it takes me to go, but
i know
              i am very small,
and cannot control the eddy's creeping currents-
constant-currents
thus
          submitting
my wayfaring self
to the
unfathomable.

III
__

these trees towering
                                         above me
around me,
the sapling,
the blanketing
                              (in my lifetime)
                                blooming branches
creating
an emotional, outer, physical, inner, spiritual
                              dwindling
like the leaves left shivering beneath the cold winter's frost,
once casually
                falling,
                              dropping,
drying up around my soul
slipping
into silent winter slumber,
to awaken
                     again...
                                    --and then!
(to the dismay of my self-enlightened discovery)
i see
how small
                                            i am
only to return again
from that brownish-moist
soil-bed
                like a seed
beneath
                  the ground
                                        never sprouting,
only fogetting,
the once and always forvever
and ever
the natural
insignificance
                                                                 of being.

I am,
however, no hero,
just a lowly poet
in the always
and forever
quest for the pursuit of
truth...