When lamination slowly starts to creep
We weep
We seek
To release
We're meek
Helpless
Sleep sleeplessly
Terrible dreams
We seek what they mean
Froze
Stuck
In our lamination
Paralyzed in our dreams
Rainbows and unicorns were not in them
And if they were they were what led me to these nightmares
Nightmares when I try to run
Try to scream
Try not to stare at the rising sun
My lips blue
lying on the beach
Skin pale and sand smeared lips
Eyes unblinking
almost vacant, but not quite

There's still life!
My body rarely barely breathing
So still that it's eerie
My brown eyes almost vacant and unmoving
I know I'm there
I can hear the ocean
I can feel the morning breeze brushing my sand covered face and the strands of my hair
The problem is that it isn't me
There's no way I'm this beautiful or pale
Yes, I'm almost dying
But she's not me
Her skin is a white porcelain
Her eyes are the only thing of mine that's hers
Her hair brown
Her figure slim yet curvy
I'm in her body
I remembered
My body changed
But not my soul
This is me
The opposite of me
In a parallel universe who almost succeeded in what I did
*My soul was showing me what my other me did too

She's absolutely gorgeous,
a broken-mold girl.
She breaks necks,
infects the hearts of men
with her pretty eyes.

Wise men know
she's the loveliest woman on Earth.
There's something nicely
mysterious about her,
tells me she's of great worth.

There are no written words
to describe her beauty,
she's so fleeting,
very charming.

I would cross
a thousand oceans
just to kiss her.
I would scale
a million dunes
to gaze upon her,
to watch her shimmer.

I would never harm her,
not a single hair
on her head
& if there was
a glimmer of hope,
I'd die for her.

We search once more for the crystal stream
Where poets wrote and young lovers dreamt
Of the beautiful years to come

But no more now is the crystal stream
Where poets wrote and lovers dreamt
Of the beautiful years to   come

The crystal stream now a fetid place
Of sewage and industrial waste
The hedgerows long ripped out and gone
The once green fields now barren ground
What legacy do we leave to our unborn sons
Now that the beautiful years have gone

But we poets still can sit and dream
And write of things that might have been
In our minds we still see the crystal stream
And dream of the beautiful years to come

I dream of going far away.
Plunging into the grandeur
And the vastness
Of the world.
I am ready to leave this place;
I am ready, I say,
To be away.

I will write and draw,
And take drugs with strangers.
I will sleep on the beach,
Bathe in rivers,
And plunge into nature,
Away from four walls,
From screens and cars,
And toward greenery and stars;
Splendid laughter and epiphanies
Spilling from the ether,
Behind trees and over mountains,
In the silent water of calm lakes,
And in the crimson sky
Of some northwestern twilight.

I will wander abandoned roads
And drink coffee in midnight diners
Thousands of miles from home,
For the road beckons,
And the moon never waits.

The wanderlust of youth
Is nothing to waste.

What I've Got,
I've got a lot
I got a third chance
to Resurrect my Life
Around Two People
Who Love Me, Love Me a Lot
In the Norhwest Heaven,
Heaven sent
A Chance to Reunite
with my Mother, she and I are just now getting a Chance
to get to Know each other.
My Mother's Husband is a Trip
An air of Fresh Breath,
a Mint Condiment
A House of Loving Animals,
Quite a Variety, I might add
A Place to Open my Spirit to Nature's Wonder,
To Let Her In, Hear Her Plea
Walk along within Her Comfort
And get to know the Inner Me
God bless, I've Got A lot.

{ My Poetry Home is not forgotten, I have been transformed by my online Family, I really Appreciate all the comfort and wisdom}

Just because I'm old and it takes
me an hour to get from A to B,
never judge me as you don't
know who I was the things in
life I have seen.

Age brings knowledge, its brings
arthritis in my left knee, you think
you have seen things son, Ive been
in wars seen **** you never want
to see.

I may look useless but thats the
secret you see, for the old were
young once we fought with knuckles
not like you ******* with guns
and knifes, thats the way of *******.

You may lift a finger to me, but ill just
grab it snap it back, lets see you give the
finger now ya little punk, ill break the
other two if you disrespect me.

I may be old but that doesn't make me
weak, I have knowledge and experience,
kid you just came out your *****, so
think when you speak to your elders.
for we may seem weak and frail but
we can teach you youngsters a thing or three

i don't think anyone will understand
the pain
of being completely abandoned
by the people who are supposed to love you the most.

Things won't stop falling
won't stop breaking or slowly cracking
everything shattering into a million pieces
flying everywhere and never found again to put back together
or fixed to be new again
I won't stop falling
I won't stop crashing into this bottomless pit of depression and sorrow that nips deep down into my bones
I'm falling
I'm crashing
I'm way too deep to stop falling or crashing down into what feels forever
I have to stop it
stop it the only way I know how to

I can barely move
I can barely talk
I can't breathe when I'm this way
It's gotten worse
And it happens more often
I'm paralyzed in a nightmarish dream and I come out gasping
I smile in the beginnings
because it tries to pull me under and can't
But after a while it wins and pulls me under
I fight
I try to move, but all I get is a bit of shaking
And I try to talk or scream, but all I get is a short puffed out breath
I try to breathe more, but I hyperventilate
I half wake up from it to try to get free, but it pulls me under and smiles at me

The river of lies
They're filled with tears
The tears of hearts lied to
If only mankind hadn't have existed, or were just honest
This river wouldn't be there
*And it wouldn't be the most hated or used