I used to like a lot of things
But now the magic’s gone,
So here’s a list of things I hate
Sorry if I ramble on…

I hate the way my voice sounds
When I’m talking to my "friends"

I hate the long and lonely nights
They never seem to end

I hate the sunlight in my eyes
The tears steadily fall

I hate the people in this house
My Mom, my Dad, I hate them all

I hate the way my body looks
I hate the fat and curves

I hate the way my brain functions
I’m always on my own nerves

I hate that I’m forced to write
Just to keep my memory

I hate the people I cry over
When they were happy leaving me

I hate that I rely on drugs
To keep me in a decent mood

I hate that my body physically rejects
all attempts at eating food

I hate that I'm always sorry
For things that aren’t my fault

I hate the thoughts my brain creates
I can’t deal with the assault

I hate all of the little things
Hanging on my shelf

But the one thing that I hate the most
Is how much I hate myself

my heart betrays me
knowing, witnessing a definite pitfall
I've run through these toxic hills
have heaved for breath
and quenched the consuming fire
with slow, deliberate pails of water
as flames scorched my everglades, my morning dew
and golden grass fields,
I have tasted these winds
and ash already collect on my tongue
I betray my own
for I hope