she knows she has to let go
but she's not ready just yet
you were playing with fire
but she didn't see it as a threat
she likes pretending she doesn't miss you
pretending she doesn't care
but you set her on fire from the first moment you were there
and her biggest mistake wasn't falling in love with you
it was thinking you would love her back
now no one can make up for what she thinks she lacks
and as the nights grow longer
she's become increasingly afraid to admit
you don't just constantly cross her mind
you still live in it

You set are me up for failure
You made me cry in bed;
Loved me with your anger
Torn my heart to shreds.

Hiding away my broken pieces
They fell for the lies I said;
As I learnt of comfort in syringes
And illegal prescription pads.

I became a complete stranger
A vile monstrous object;
Lost in this strange creature
My mind no longer intact.

You've hurt me way deeper
Than I've ever slept;
Still struggling to trust people
Losing count of secrets I kept.

I'll crawl under the covers
When alone and scared.
Now I've seen the monster
Living inside my head.

The rain is pouring hard today, and I am not with you. My thoughts linger and find you still, though. It is the time of the day when the sun has just finished setting, but a little light still hangs on to the sky ready to sleep. I imagine the world being wrapped in a humid coldness, with you and me living in it. I can see you and me in your single bed, with our skin cold from the weather, with the evening chill clinging onto your bed sheets. I'm laying on your chest and you're brushing my hair with your fingers. We both have heavy eyelids, remaining quiet so as not to break the white noise engulfing us. I picture you planting a kiss on my forehead. I can see you sleepily smiling from the corner of my eye, with my eyelash brushing against your chin with every tired blink. We stay quiet, but our bodies converse. Your index finger traces patterns on my right shoulder down to my arms. My breath creates warm patches on the dip of your neck. It's dark now. We both have the same thought in mind: this is perfect. But we don't have to say it to let each other know.

The rain is pouring hard today, and I am not with you.

Should I stay,
Knowing that you are not what I need,
But what I want?

Should I leave,
Knowing that a life with you might be chaining,
But feeling free when you kiss my skin?

Should I cry,
Knowing that things are not the way they used to be,
But try to accept anything you offer me?

Should I give up,
Knowing that we are far too different,
But knowing that we both want to be in love?

Should I?

Should I not?

For the times that seemed so dark and hollow

You have been a beacon of light

You've  tripped me up

You've helped  me up

Your heated touch has stung as well as thrilled

Your eyes have held disspointment

And unrivaled love

You've ripped my heart from my soul

And put it back just as easily

I guess what I know is that

The beauty of us

is in the restoration of tragedy

The righting of wrongs

The life of lovers

Tormented souls

Finding meaning and solace

In each others arms

Wrapped by the thighs

In passionate pleas

For Love to last

Forever and all the versions

In all dimensions

Of existence to last for infinity

Is after all our aeons together

The depth of our challenges

Nothing much compared to

Our infinite forever love.