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 Nov 2020
Medusa
Pride, like a ****
Swelled with dawn
I sing to the world

This World gives
To me great gifts
A fire to my breath

Sunset will break me
I wrote this to go with a painting I found online. It was a Japanese print of a rooster but it seemed glorious.
I was a bird
پرنده ای بودم
In the sky
From your eyes...
...در آسمانی از چَشمانِ تو
When you didn't see me flying
در آن هنگام
که پروازم را حس نمی کردی

Why are your eyes so beautiful?!
چرا چَشمانِ تو آنقدر زیباست!؟
That I released the lock of hair
To your wide blue sky...
که من موهایم را
...در آسمانِ پهنِ آبیِ تو رها کردم
 Nov 2020
nivek
open doors and unscalable walls
one lets you enter the other embodies formidable
experience, discernment, and acceptance
two give you an edge, the other a road to freedom
 Nov 2020
nivek
goodbye will outstay hello
and memory will make up what cannot be remembered
where there are no blanks, only darkened rooms.
 Nov 2020
r
When I think of those days, I only
remember gathering wood in the cold
in my black coat so I could get a fire going
in the cast iron of a gray early morning;
I dream what it is to be a man lying
beside a delicate woman, sad and quiet,
playing the mandolin, looking at her as
if she were a couple of plums together like
a cluster within reaching distance on the branch;
thinking of the lunar dust of her face, and how
her fingers were like feathers; I heard
the silence of the mill wheel not turning
in the stream and the wild turkeys not drinking;
I knew they had hypnotized themselves wide-
eyed and staring into the steel ax of the creek.
 Nov 2020
Chelsea Rae
I've been playing tug-o-war
For so long.
Going back and forth.
Between pros and cons.
Between loves and fears.

And it's finally exhausted me.
It's brought me down to my hands and knees.
Burnt palms and aching feet.

I drop the rope of trying.
I drop the rope of pleasing.

I stop the yelling,
I stop the pleading.

I can see no amount of words
No actions or revenge,
No love and patience,
Could ever bring me anywhere
Except back to The End.

I don't think I have it in me
To let go of all I resent.

It poisoned me long ago
And I waited to find content.

I worked for it day and night
And saw nothing in return.
No change permanent enough to ever make it work.
Now I'm drained completely
But I didn't go out without a fight.

I hope doing everything exactly
The way you wanted
Without even trying to change
Was worth it all.

Worth it all.
 Nov 2020
Chelsea Rae
It fell slowly,
By each finger letting go,
One by one.

I had such tightly clasped hands
Holding up my mask
But I realized
It gets you nowhere
Fast.

We'll see how much longer we teeter
On the fake pretences I was upholding.

Will you finally pick up your weight and bring back balance?
Or will we fall together and collapse?

I can't smile at you anymore.
I can't kiss you without my heart cringing.
I can't hug you without flinching.
I don't want you to touch me
Unless you've learned how meet me in all the places you left me behind.
You've been just as selfish as I have
Except the difference is,
You've always known what you were doing.

You lie behind my back,
You cry behind my back,
You become empty
Instead of reach for me
And now I am empty too.

No more accommodation.
No more self sacrifice.
And if that's not enough for you
Well this whole thing never sufficed.

I am completely disatisfied
And yet I've cried behind the smiling mask
Mostly for the fact
That our hands are tied.

I never wanted to raise our little stars seperately,
But they might be better off
Spread out across distances,
Like stars in the night sky.

If you ever cared about me
More than you cared about yourself
If you ever cared more about them,
Then we'd have burned forever
Instead of becoming candle melt.

I won't play a part any longer,
No more masks.
With all that being said,
Let's see how long we last.
So done pretending.
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