Alone, though I've caused myself to be
Bitter, weak, & fragile. It's just hollow inside of me
Confused by how I got here, or who I am today
Determined to do better in every single way
Although it feels over I have a long way left to run
Eventually I hope I'll understand what it's all been for
Fresh & ready to face whatever comes my way
Glints of me keep poking through
Hiding
It's overwhelming just how overbearing I've become
Just a little further, I'm sure my day is done

from the deep depths of hell.
she didn't belong here;
she said she accidentally fell.

She attempted to leave
but that's the decision of fate.
she continued to wade in the fire
daydreaming of the big pearly white gate.

I woke up prepared for an interview I knew would occur
I passed the interview,
Got a good response,
The incentive of good pay,
And a promise of emails to further the process along

I told my brother
He wasn't happy for me

I'm going to tell my dad
He'll be happy for me

I'm going to tell my friend
They'll be happy for me

I wish I could tell my mom
But she's dead

But if she were alive
I know she'd be happy for me

She wakes me up deep in the night.

I understand you, she smiles
snuggling into me, her nose,
pressed cotton soft on my cheek

I have no strength, I cry
not one, for you

I love your weakness
love you for your weakness
her breath wafts into mine

and the boy stuck in his age
floats in the web
of the girl forever
forgiving.

You can
Hug me,
Kiss me,
And snuggle close to me.
18/11/2020.