Can you tell me why
It is
That I love him
Even after that
He has
Deeply hurt me
Over and over again
Broken me down
To the core
Left me bleeding
On the floor?...

Why is it
That I just can't forget
All the memories
Which now only are a pain?
Maybe I should just go
**** a random guy
So I can delete
The specific memory
Which I want to forget
The most...

Be happy
At least it was with someone
Whom you love
My mom says
Trying to cheer me up
But I'm not
So sure about that
Anymore...

'Cause she don't know
About all the mess
Which happened
Afterwards
She's not the one
Who becomes sad
When she sees him
Passing by...

So tell me why
This boy still is on my thoughts
Together with all the things
Which have been said and done?
My "Age of Depression"
Have now become real
I'm not really eating
And I feel really sick
But I'm trying to look fine
Hiding...
That on the inside
I cry...

Tell me why
I didn't listen
To my friends' warnings
Telling me to stay far away
From this one guy?
But I couldn't
Even when I
Actually tried...

Tell me why
Everything went
As wrong as it did ?
Why everything is a mess
And why is there
All this stress
In my life
At the moment?...

Why can't I eat
Even though I'm hurting
From starving
Through the most of the day
And then only eat a little
At dinner
With my family
To cover up
That I'm in pain...

Why can't I make myself hate
The person
Who hurt me?
Why can't I honestly
Join
My friends
When they make innocent jokes
About him
Just to cheer me up?...

Tell me why
There isn't a remedy
Which can delete
All the bad things
Which have happened
lately...

Or maybe a time-machine?
Then I could change
My choice
Of going straight to
The university
'Cause then I would
Never had meet him
And there wouldn't be
All these problems...

Tell my why
I don't feel happy
and why my nights
Are sleepless
Tell my why
The only person
Who knows how
To handle me
When I'm feeling like this
Is out traveling
And won't be back
Before June...

Tell me why
My mind
Is humming
A sad tune...

It's holiday
Now I can heal the wounds
Which you gave me
Not so long ago

I won't have any tears
Hiding behind my eyes
Just because of the reason
That I saw you pass by

I won't have this awful feeling
Of something heavy
Stepping on my chest
Who knows
Maybe I'll finally be able
To get some rest

The fact that I
Don't have to see you
Means that I can start to forget
And reset myself
Back to before we even meet

But don't begin to think
That I hate you
I'm just hurt
And hurt feelings
Are hard to show in a positive way

But the fact that I am
Angry, bitter and sad
Is only a confirmation
Of how much
You actually means
To me
Or else
I wouldn't even care
To waste all this energy
On those feelings...

Everything would be easier
If I hated you
'Cause then I wouldn't always have
To defend
You
When they talk about you...

I wouldn't have to make it clear
That I'm just as bad as you
When it comes to creating this mess
Afterall,
I could have rejected you...

Therefore I get ******
When people call me a victim
'Cause I had a choice
So there's no ******* way
That I am a victim...

But if I hated you
Then I would have spared
All the energy
Which I'm using on defending you
And that's a task
Which is really ******* me...

'Cause if I hated you
Then I would only approve
Of the awful things
Which has been said about you...

If I hated you
Then I wouldn't care about
That you're just as troubled
As I have gotten
As a consequense of this mess...

I keep telling people
That you're having a hard time
And that it won't help on it
If we keep speaking ill about the guy
Who only has as much of the responsibility
For this mess
As I...

Love doesn't like me
It never have
And it never will...

Love doesn't like me
'Cause it likes
To see me suffer...

Love doesn't like me
It doesn't matter what I do
I always mess it up...

Love doesn't like me
It hurts
And I've had enough...

Love doesn't like me
It has always been like this
You'll find me walking alone...

Love doesn't like me
Neither do I like
Love...

Do I regret
That I let you in?
No,
I don't regret
That it was you
Who I let in.
But I regret everything
Which we have now become...

I don't regret the act done
While being afected by feelings.
Feelings which I never knew,
Before I meet you.
But I do regret actions,
Which I have done
Because you hurt me...

Because just as much
As I care about you
Just as much does it hurt me now
To see you.
I would prefer
Not to be near you
Because it hurts
When I am...

I regret the words I said in anger,
While I was being
In a hurt state of mind
Where I only knew one way
To let it all out...

I deeply regret
So many things
To write about them all
Would take forever.
But the only thing,
Which I don't regret
Is
That I let you in...