sometimes love leaves you
aching;
longing, for something
your fingers can’t touch,
and your mind can’t identify.

sometimes love leaves you
hungover;
blackout nights/headache in the a.m,
can’t move, your body’s heavy and
last night’s a blur.

sometimes love leaves you
poetry;
lines and lines of whispers,
words that you can only
give to 11:11 wishes, and midnight.

sometimes love(rs) leave;
going like a vagabond,
wanting none of your time,
the ache in your chest
throbbing.

i could never ever  forget the night i met nari. it was like magic, like the powers that be wanted our destinies to collide, to crash, to blend.

it was the night a meteor shower was to come to my small town. people came from neighbouring cities just to see them, these bright lights, these shooting stars. everyone was camping out, the high school's football field covered with trucks and blankets and tents. There were even people cuddling with blankets wrapped around them in the bleachers, their words filling the air as they prepared to stare at the sky, prepared to see something more beautiful than anything they'd ever seen.

i was doing the same, sitting in the back of my dad's truck with a blanket over my shoulders, but i was beginning to doze off. i was feeling a sensation much like falling, when i heard a someone speaking in my direction.

"need help staying awake?"

it turns out, i didn't need to stare at the sky and see a meteor shower to see something more beautiful than anything i'd ever seen. i just needed to open my eyes and look at her. she was smiling, and god, she had a smile that grow flowers, birth stars, and mend butterfly wings. and she was smiling. at. me.

I want to inspire people
I want someone to look at me and say
"because of you i didn't give up"

We took a drive. I had things to say.
My heart was aching, shattered.
I rehearsed the words throughout the day,
Believing that it mattered.

I met you then but I only saw,
The mask you chose to show.
If you were suffering underneath,
Then how was I to know?

I said,
" Your grey facade hides worlds so vast,
Naked flesh of fruit, beneath the rind.
Your future's informed by its turbulent past,
Full understanding; when you look behind."

You said,
" You try too hard, you think too much.
You never live for now.
Wrapping words around the wrong ideas,
You miss the point somehow."
"Stuck in place, because it's safe,
You're too afraid to grow.
If you had begun to change your fate,
Then how was I to know?"

You saw me within a grey facade.
I saw you within a grey facade.

We could not say more, it seemed sufficient,
That love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love is ignoring all that came before,
Loving only the moment.
That coin of the realm: elusive, bright.
Your grey facade hides
Such a beautiful light.
Love has many names.
Call any one aloud and I will answer.
I will come.
You will see.
You'll see me clearly, even behind this grey facade.

all of a sudden I felt
really tired.

Like the world had drained me
for everything that
I had.

IT’S 2:38 AM BUT I NEVER SLEEP
ANYMORE BECAUSE
OVER TIME I CLOSE MY EYES
YOUR PICTURE BURNS IN MY
EYELIDS AND THE THOUGHT
OF YOU SITS IN THE BACK
OF MY BRAIN

ocean and the sky
will join their hands
trying to wear me down
as the sand
runs through my mouth
everything goes darker
as the sky wears black
and lack
of sleep has gone so further now
my mother and my father
they will try to persuade me
to **** my dreams and follow
the ones they've already seen
as the streams carry me down
I would only scream
not for you or another
but only for my dreams