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 Jan 2021
Sheila Haskins
I dreamt of you last night
You were laughing in the light
I was laughing with you too
We had nothing else to do
We never looked ahead or behind us
I’d forgotten how life could be
Sparkling easy and free
Now I don’t do very much
Routine chains me, keeps me in touch
With reality such as it is
I do miss you and the fizz
You were my bottle of champagne
In my dreams you will remain
I dreamt of you
Yes I dreamt of you.......

Last night
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
I have frequently had a
cold functional detachment
from the mindless moronic masses,

Those self-damaging idiots
walking around with
no introspection,
hurting other people while
trying to acquire status,
love, and material success.

I have been fuming
with a legitimate sense of high self-regard
and disdain for the so-called plain folks
with no desire to expand their understanding
or just be decent in general;

But what if I become the *****
who has to be fake nice all the time
just to manage my minor interactions with people?
Will I witness a slow disintegration of my ideal self,
that kind and attentive helpful healing artist,
that deep empathic intellectual, master of compassion?

How superior could I be if I subtract empathy
from my tired and frustrated being,
if I became the cog replacer in this
multinational machine, while sacrificing
my own inner honest decency?
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
Once she wore
soft velvet skin,
made for touching
and all-night loving.

Hard work to make a living.
Tender affections giving,
suckling children,
and taking care of them;
She did it with love,

but time took
her once
supple yet soft skin,
and in aging
weathered it
till it was leathered
though still tethered
to her gentle heart.

Youthful vigor,
changed to
aged wisdom,
and anyone around
was greatly gifted
with the words
she gave them.

Till, the wheel eternal
took her energy,
and every cell and molecule
was given back to
nature’s majesty.
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
Life is multicolored leaves,
growing and leaving
season after season,
colors changing
falling in a breeze
then disintegrating,
before their siblings
start growing in their place.

It is a single child’s
growing smile
as laughter forms,
happiness before
she has learned
of the horrors of war.

It is nature’s dance,
as time makes us move,
as the wind plays through
vibrating, and moving,
taking light leaves
and turning these
tree things into
tiny ballerinas.

Life is self-reflected
to be inspected
and see all things
changing.
It is the mirror of ages
blank white pages
slowly writing themselves,
to be eventually forgotten.

It is deliciously beautiful
and frankly quite rotten,
a matter of perspective
and all humans got one.

I think its great fun
to try and define
what life is,
but I know it is
beyond this poem.
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
He saw the parade of pain,
rough edges worn down
as he moved across town.

The mirror of boy not yet a man,
transitioning between
not understanding anything
and finally learning
that there is a universe full of
thing that he might love,
but will never learn enough
to fully understand.

Neck perpetually bent,
eyes always lowering,
partly from walking
and reading
at the same time,
and being worn down
by the bullies all around,
especially the tyrant at home.

Self-esteem was a strange fantasy,
and anger became
his self-inflicted pain,
but books and tv shows
were a nice way to let go
if just for a short bit.

Racing thoughts that kept him awake,
unless he played a cd to keep those
thoughts quietly tucked away.

Twenty years later with knowledge well earned,
the world still turns, but now it burns.
The boy is a man, so to speak,
and with everything he has read, and listen to,
to help adjust his world view
with the constantly changing times,
he still hasn’t mastered enough to explain
what makes people hurt
and how to ease the world’s ever-expanding pain.
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
It’s hard to breath
but easy to bleed
with this hole
in her breast,
a gaping wound
in her chest.

She tries to keep
the weeping
suppressed,
to not let her
children
see her depressed,
but it is beyond
obvious.

One body missing
from the chair,
and child’s bed.
She still feels
a quiet dread.

No sleep,
but a little drink
to fill the void;
They say
time will take
the pain away,
but another loss
is what she is
trying to avoid.

She goes on,
while her family
tries to bear
the same agony
with stoic despair.
There is only
air and tension
to fill their
emptiness.

No shared connection
or conversation
to help them all
deal with this.

So, day by day
the nothingness
burrows deeper
and eats away.

The space between,
human beings
expands beyond
reckoning.

Strangers,
keep expecting them
to come back together again,
but the crack between
these human beings
becomes too far to leap.
Till, one day they are
too far gone from each other
to even speak.

The reaper’s victory
is totally complete,
because for one,
he got four souls to keep.
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
As I say goodnight
to my former life,
let go of those
previous blinking lights
that once defined
my divine
yester self.

I fall asleep
and all that was me
is washed about,
swirled around,
reorganized,
and restored.

I awake refreshed,
form regenerated,
mind invigorated,
and ready for me,
the essence of my being
to be reintegrated.

Almost new,
similar to
but not exactly
the same,
as my previous
version.
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
Tension pinching
my chest
while I am clenching
my teeth
trying to catch
my bad breath.

Red eyes strained,
and pained
from coughing so hard
that my neck veins
bulges out so far.

So, tired
but I can’t sleep,
haven’t eaten
much all week
and I am feeling
really weak.

Nauseous,
and afraid
so many things
I have yet to say.
If I die today
who will know
or care anyways?

I’m scared
and confused.
After all
that I have done,
this is how I lose.

No one here
to talk to me
and I don’t
want to believe
this might be
how I leave
the world.

Is there anyone there?
 Jan 2021
Graff1980
One withering look
and I am an unbound book,
pages fluttering away, broken,
smitten with tiny kisses,
or temporary ink tokens.

She can reignite a dying sun,
set solarized skies ablaze
and make them burn
for days and days.

She can shift the seas,
then trade places with
strange faces that
echo older generations
which will never come back.

Five fingers folding in
touching my mind,
burying brilliance in my skin,
she is the door to
Oz, Wonderland,
and Neverland,
making me wonder if I can
fly like superman.

She supersedes the entirety of my being,
enveloping, in all shades of dreams,
making my reality her plaything.

Not a person, more like a metaphor,
or a hint of a thought I’m searching for.
There’s eternity and an ocean’s more
waiting for this dreamer outside her door.
 Dec 2020
Graff1980
She promised revolutions
with the slow movement
of her dancing form;

Of new evolutionary
revelations,
that may be scary
testaments
to the new environment
we would exist in.

Artisan of living,
lips giving
sweet passion’s nectar,
she was a specter
of life and death’s
imaginary perfectness.

A thousand point of
poetic reactions to love,
more than enough
to dream eternity
written within
the cold skin
of infinity.

She promised me
a grand reality,
and I wept,
so ready to succumb.
Then she left
and I was struck numb
and dumb.

Now, I wonder
who taught her
how to lie so
beautifully?
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