My sleep abandoned me
when being Awake greeted me tightly
into the needs of my babies

Now my sleep wanders alone
like a hungry dog searching for food

So at nights I chase my sleep
with whatever I can find in the fridge
but my sleep runs away
as soon as my babies awake

The universe is pulsing,
beating and growing,
a heartbeat quickening
to vast to be understood
but still sickly constricting
as if time and space is convicting
me of crimes I have yet to commit
and some sins man has not yet
gotten around to inventing.

So, I am venting pulsars of pain
that rotate out and around then
back in again.
My black hole dilations
greedily absorb all of the light,
and space flotsam,
never returning anything.

Unending, beyond comprehending,
still I keep bending my mind
in strange contortions
to understand humanity’s
and spacetime’s weird distortions.

the crowd is relentless,
they blame her for their suffering,
yet you know better,
you know she is merely a child at heart
with the weight of a whole kingdom on her shoulders,
her 'council' are to blame.

their greed almost doomed the kingdom she rules over,
"she does not deserve this" you utter,
you almost don't feel yourself doing it,
running at her,
               raising your shield against the rotten vegetables and stones,

like it was dictated by the gods that you were to be her shield,
her bastion of hope,
she looks up at you
her eyes watered from the shame she endures

yet she manages to force a smile,
a smile of gratitude,
    as if she was begging for someone to save her
and it appears,

              she saw your smile through your visor,
making her even less distraught

to me,
you are
an art

                              to you,
                              I was
                              a tragedy

it was quiet here yesterday
the rain came and dripped
with noises outside the back
i looked out to see the gutter
slipped and listened to the
sounds

looked at the wet glistening
on the ivy

wedged the cloth to soak
the water up then lit the fire

done some drawings
&
cookings. a pleasant
day for me

comparing large dresses

hoping that all will be
well

with morse

Today is death.
I was promise it would only be
minor increments of damage killing me.
Disintegration in degrees,
a slow erosion of my identity.

Whilst flakes of skin
break from my thin
frame and fly away.
My mind does the same,
but unlike my flesh
does not regenerate.

Thoughts once clear
get foggy then farther away.
Till there is only an inkling
of the shrinking remembrance.
Then it finally blinks out
before I realize that
it was leaving for good.

The person I was
becomes confused
with the man I was
in my youth,
two beings merging
and separating
as important aspects
begin evaporating.

Memories become harder
to retain,
and impossible to regain.
So, I lose my name
on the very same
day I lose the faces
of those I’ve loved.

My mobility goes from limited
to non-existent.
All functions autonomic
loose cohesion
and I go from resting
to wheezing
trying to capture
a breath that doesn’t
want me.

Mind gone,
body follows
making my cold form hollow.

Then the memory of me,
becomes distorted.
My family and friends
lose tiny bits,
and bigger parts
of our shared past.

Till, all who knew me pass.
Then at last
the words I left
are swallowed up
in cosmic chaos,
lost with all that human
flotsam.

your curious gaze,
teasing smile, laughter. languid
like straight tequila.

ever flowing and
missing the rim of my cup
an intentful flow.

alikened to shame and
reddened on my dark cheeks like
ripened tomatoes.

you are a pleasant
sharp tasting fruit. bitter yet
ready to be plucked.

vineless. ever free.
forbidden. incandescent
and reflective shine.

To be lost adrift
in a life of pointlessness,
to sink not swim
giving in
to the darkness,

knowing
that no amount of growing
will guarantee
one ounce of eternity,

that all which was lost
cannot be recovered,
only shimmering
reflections in our
collective memory
connect us to the deceased.

Brother, friend,
sister, father, mother
all figures trend
toward hopeless ends.

We are subject to
and subjugated by
a fear and certainty
that all things die.

This why tears
leak from my eyes.

Hello embittered fighter,
nighttime neck biter
who inspired
more monstrous stories
then all these gory
modern allegories.

How do you do,
you shaggy dude,
who howls at the moon
racing with all that
ravishing wolf prowess
as you go prowling
for your next victim
or late night
kibble nibble.

Hey there my yummy mummy,
how does life hang around
that shriveled form
time has bound
as you try to bandage
your immortal wounds,
while stumbling
and bumbling
with incoherent moans.

Hey fish face
lets race
to the bottomless black lagoon
where dumb surfer dudes
go to party
but end up sleeping with
the fishes,

and to my friend Frankie
I thank thee,
for lately
I have lost that old
monster loving feeling,
but you got the spark
that I needed to bolt back to
that old monster movie,
matinee madness I missed.