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 3h
Kalliope
I knew that I’d feel silly
After I had some sleep,
Because honestly, you haven’t cared for awhile-
You’ve got a new woman to keep.

I can see your game now,
You just wanted to feel tall,
And the easiest way to do that
Was to make me feel real small.

It’s fine now, it’s whatever,
I’ve wasted tears for over a month.
You could’ve just ******* blocked me
The moment you knew I wasn’t enough.

But that wouldn’t fit your narrative
Of crazy exes to collect,
Still, I hope you’ve done some healing
So you don’t peak her anxiety next.

Isn’t it so funny,
The way these things go?
Life is just a simulation-
Trust, I’m not in your loop anymore
I went against my intuition but I knew it weeks ago when I saw her name, you guys will laugh when you read this and I will never doubt my gut again
Sometimes I tear
not from the pain
but from a dream unheld
a cat curled warm
in the cradle of my hands
a sanctuary..
maybe safety...is just a castle
in a far away land
and I have to close my eyes
to be there.
safe and sound
but somehow, I see myself turning all the way around
a warrior will always run back into a burning house

If I should die today
I'll know my heart
tried to settle it's affairs
and understand the dark

but, Please
no more burning
Take it easy on the woman who sings
let the night hold me soft

Love,
from a past life
maybe I was a nightmare
and I deserved the tragedy
or could I have been
a sigh in the trees
My heart is
its very own stone on the altar
I think it's moonstone like
June lives inside its shelter
and sometimes amethyst
a calming prayer
a song.
my hope.
was used on the wrong people.
yes I know my mistakes.

but please
no more burning
take it easy on the woman who sings
let the sunlight hold me easy
Too good to be true
Too true to be good
That second one requiers an unfortunate life to be understood

Say what you mean
Mean what you say
I don't see the difference between these statements to this day

Love and loss
No love at all
One being better than the other is not anyone's place to call

Keep your chin up
With a glass jaw
Even advice with the best intentions can leave you broken and raw

©2025
How can I tell you
Just what you mean?
How can I say the things
I can't even say to me?

It will all be over
We will be left to want
What neither can have
An eternal taunt

But we will remember
The words we have written
They are etched into hearts
Left bereft yet smitten

Some things are easier
Said than undone
We try to fight it
But it cannot be won
Something good happened today
I thought something bad was gonna happen
Naturally
It's my ******* brain..
It's always the ******* same..

Something good happened today
For the first time, since I don't know when..
I was happy and excited for a change
To be honest, it felt kind of strange..

We decided to go out to celebrate
Couple of drinks
Couple of shots
Pool and bowling

Bowling was fine
Someone was at the pool table next to us
They strike up a conversation
"How long have you been together?"
Are you engaged? Married?
This guy has clearly had a few too many, but I answer, just making conversation, being friendly..

"We have been together on & off"
"Never engaged or married"
This answer puts you in a bad mood

I think to myself
"Why should I lie to this dude?"
Now you've got an attitude
It's ruining the mood

Feeling like a ******* ventriloquist doll once again
Never know what I can and can't say
Everything always comes out the wrong way
And it's the price that I have to pay
My one, genuinely good day taken away
Too good to be true, that I could be happy for just one ******* measly day

Why is it always this ******* way?!
 5d
Kalliope
Sleep evades
A restless soul
Mind replays
What once felt whole
Heart thumping
Out my chest
Shaky hands
Doing my best
Visions blur
You never touched-
So how the ****
Do I miss you this much?
0400
 6d
abyss
Stuck in a crossroad
always in the middle of these **** roads
Where do I go?
Which road do I choose?
Does it even lead anywhere?
Do either have a dead end?
Stuck in a crossroad —
or multiple crossroads
Identity, morality, existence
Love, pain, hope
I pick my path —
Another crossroad
A little depressed, a little existential dread, a little hopeful, a lot of everything.
When you loved me,
the world paused its rotation,
like even time
knew not to interrupt.
Everything else faded,
noise, doubt,
the version of me
before there was you.

You looked at me
like I was an oasis
in your endless desert.
Like your whole life
had led you here,
and now that you’d found me,
you could finally rest.

You didn’t love me gently.
You loved me like revelation.
Like touching me
meant risking everything,
but you’d already decided
I was worth the scars.

You saw in me
something untouched,
unguarded, and fragile.
A truth not curated,
not shaped by the world.
But the part of me
still soft,
still pure.

And instead of rushing toward it
to claim or change it,
you stood there,
stunned.
Like you didn’t know
whether to protect it
or fall to your knees in hunger.

You held me like I was made
of breath and glass,
something holy and fleeting.
You wanted to wrap your whole being around mine,
not just with desire,
but with devotion.

And still,
there was craving.
There was hunger.

The kind that doesn’t want to consume
to destroy,
but to understand.
To merge.
To belong.
To be lost in another.

And I…
I had never felt more real
than when I was against you.
Never more known
than in the way
you almost trembled
just to be near me.

That kind of love
needs forever
just to make sense of.
It arrives wild,
sets fire to everything you were,
and leaves you standing
in the ruins of unanswered questions.

And now,
no one says my name
with the weight
your voice gave it.
No one looks at me
like I’m both salvation
and temptation.

And maybe that’s a mercy.
Because what if…
I don’t miss you.
I miss being
unforgettable.
Just more musings from someone processing the loss of great and unfinished love. The kind that never gets an ending.
 7d
Kalliope
Never did I not love you,
I want to make that clear.
It’s what you were doing to my mind that made me run in fear.
And I know you’re probably laughing at these feelings I feel,
you did that to the last one but maybe her feelings were real.
It doesn’t matter, really, because it doesn’t change
the way that we are-
our whole dynamic, I rearranged.
I just can’t help thinking if I’d learned to shut up,
felt my feelings in silence and not easily gave up,
would things be different?
Had I not said what I said,
and then instead of apologizing, I laid stubborn in my bed,
I don’t know why I led with shame, and I don’t know why
you didn’t let me take blame, because I did ruin it, that’s a pure fact.
Unless you actually wanted to run too, and you just never mentioned that.
But no, I never didn’t love you;
in fact, I loved you so much.
But that doesn’t matter anymore, and I wish these thoughts would hush.
With a mouth full of peanutbutter could I finally shut the **** up?
If it's stuck to the roof of my mouth could I think before I speak-
Taking the time to read the room before I destroy it all?
 7d
Kalliope
I want to scream, get you off of my chest,
As if I could yell away my love for you-
like it’d cure my unrest.
As if the night air would accept my pain,
releasing it to the clouds,
turning you into rain.
But then you’d just be all around me,
soaking the ground-
yet I still haven’t mastered
moving on without sound.
Alright Cloudy I won't promise this is the last one, but I'll make a real effort to write about something different- this one was just already in the works 🤣
There's nowhere to hide
When dark clouds are threatening
Can't rain proof your heart.
 7d
Kalliope
Healing isn’t linear,
but I really wish it was.
Some days I’m just fine and don’t even look, and others, I check up on you a million times just because.

I hate when I feel the shift,
like dropping my phone in the ocean.
My heart races and can barely defend
against all the high-adrenaline mental commotion.

I handled the quiet so well yesterday;
you never even crossed my mind.
But here I am, mid-afternoon- turning my head,
no longer running, but you’re not behind.

Like a midnight hike gone horribly wrong-
it started to rain, we got lost in the fog,
and wound up on different trails.
Alone under stars clutching half a map
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