amazingly scurrilous
that little rascal made me jump
on the bathtub
I was barefoot early one morning
woke up at three-thirty a ******* full of beer
half opened eyes I saw him dive
behind the toilet
******
I was trying to do my business
without fully waking up
so one by one i took each cat
to set them about to slay to at least maim
the intruder
and each one yawned said meow is it breakfast time yet
I don't work for you as  they each one did the same
all three licked a paw and yawned like
hey
you woke me up for this?
not afraid of teacup  sized rodents, usually
just a wharf rat and possum ****** them
I got on shoes and grabbed a broom and went
still  needing to ****
to shoo his little fast *** away
and couldn't find him
until a month after I wanted to shower
and when
I walked in the bathroom he was using my toothbrush
and deoderant all up on the cabinet kinda posing in the mirror
so we have reconciled somewhat
I bought a new toothbrush and told
him he is welcome  in this menagerie
just don't ever use my toothbrush again

Hello Poetry likes me
Hello Poetry loves me

Sometimes Hello Poetry
likes me and loves me

Because Hello Poetry
isn't sure which is best

Woke up at sun up
as the night burned
in Bacup.

Lancashire bred
no use for t'bed
'cept for occasional slumber
and if she calls my number
the less occasional
fumble.

It looks a nice day
for *******
on a boat out
from t' bay
or just for laying and
for lazing on sand.

It would be grand
if thee'd come and join me
for a dip in t'pool,
then lunch from the chippie
and afterwards a walk down
the prom' with
a Mr Whippy along
for company.

I'm off now
wi' nets,
no answer from thee
I guess I'll be
******* today.