A mid May Day
Summer light
You turn
your violet eyes flash mine
And your hair dances with the wind
Causing anticipation
Setting love in

And I see you
With twinkling eyes in the moonlight
Lavender fireflies buzzing in the dusk
And you smile at me
Setting me so free
Of anguish and misery

And I see you
Floating in the mist
Of Rosie pink blossom
Carrying you away
Promising to see me the next day

And Then i see you
With him
And your eyes are black
And your teeth are rotten
And your hair is thin
The air is dense
And filled with sin

And I see you
With your Bleeding heart
Through your chest
Rib cage of moths
Witheringly thin
In your hellish nest
You will die in

And I see you
Where Dandelions grow from you
And bouquets I never bought you lay over your head
In this garden of death
Sing for me a hymn
To save my soul
From my deadly violet sin

you little shattered thing, have
you lost your pieces again?
are you still
seeking comfort
from someone's
apathetic hands?
allowing yourself to cave in
to their abysmal demands?

you stupid little thing you
disappear more every day
even your reflection dissipates
cause it can't bare to see your face

you human-turned-monster
have you forgotten how to live?
didn't anyone teach you how to give
parts of yourself to the others?

you ******* idiot
why can't you remember the past?
do you just choose to forget?
and why do you lie
about your quiet laments?
are you blissfully ignorant  
or are you consumed by regret?

     your sweet shy soul
     where did it go?

Some things don't end smoothly.
It's not the slow braking of a car,
A seamless transition from driving to a standstill.
Sometimes you need to slam on.
And it never happens silently,
There's always a screech or a thud or a gasp,
It takes you by surprise and it lurches you forward.
You have to hold on for dear life.
The unexpected nature of it wreaks havoc on your insides;
Butterflies are woken up from your stomach and become nausea.
You check to see if all your limbs are intact, or in fragments.
Then you do the same for your heart,
Searching to see if it went through the windshield
Or if it managed to stay held inside by your unyielding ribs,
Only ever collapsing under the strain of breaths,
Hyperventilating into an airbag.
Some things don't end smoothly.
It's not the steady sigh of relief,
It's the jagged, shaky breaths that never fully extend
In or out, and there's no calming halt afterwards,
Just a process of continuously hitting the brakes.

Everyday the tide
And what flows in I cannot
Control,
Everyday awash and I
Know that my love is real,
Because the pain is real.
Amazing the hope is the rain
And sun has become the hurt,
Fate has given twist,
Everyday I see the lost
And when I find them
Only a little of what once was,
Remains.
Everyday like the wind on my face,
The perfect imbalance tips
Under empty,
And once I was full of hope,
Only now it has become audacity.

Everyday the tide,
And the waters rage
Beyond anyones control,
Everyday the poem
Takes a few words away
From my tired soul,

Everyday
I
Still
Have
hope........

I shred you as cedar
to eat your smell—
a crick of words to ultra face-off
between bone-splitter and bliss
I

am your writer
and my heart’s cavalry
pounds your lips
with sweetness
the

submission of sugar
the

taste of honey
the

number of times
I’ve

had you in comb
buzzing your fuzz-ectomy
into a new mind of flower
to be pollinated
with the lilac breeze
of my going