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179 · Jun 2018
Loom
Ciel Noir Jun 2018
Life does not create the threads
It weaves them like a loom
Lightning strikes the fertile Earth
And causes her to bloom
One raindrop falls into the sea
Swells into a monsoon
We rise and ride upon the tide
Still howling at the Moon
179 · Jun 2023
Horizon
Ciel Noir Jun 2023
behold
the Sun is ours again
here where the stars that never set
light up the way back from the West
horizon---with---no---end---in---sight
here where the twilight lasts all night
we stand and watch that eerie light
wander across the northern sky
into the East to rise again
Ciel Noir Mar 2019
life    is     like    a    tall      tree                    we    see       other     trees
     growing         high                                   above      the      water  
              in a          rising          river           and     we    wonder
                    so            deep        that       our    questions            
                            no           one       has dared   to ask              
                               found the roots below the water
                               now we know it is the same tree
                              changing growing new branches
                              as others are lost within the river
when the great storm           from the sky                                 rise
                                comes down              and makes the river
179 · Aug 2021
Real
Ciel Noir Aug 2021
the real me:
am I what I cannot change?
who I choose to be?
178 · Jan 2019
Judge
Ciel Noir Jan 2019
Why do we take the time to judge?
The real sociopaths won't budge
And anyone redeemable
Will look at us and hold a grudge

I'm not sure where we got the nerve
To tell them what they don't deserve
Does it make us think we are better
As if God grades on a curve?

Who says who deserves to live?
Who condemns and who forgives?
Who dares to judge on their behalf
If such a Judge even exists?

Why do we dish out scarlet letters?
Shame is such a cheap vendetta
Let's be honest, we do it
Because we don't know any better.
178 · Apr 2018
______
Ciel Noir Apr 2018
I drew a line in the sand

a storm came
and blew the line away

the sand remains
Ciel Noir Aug 2018
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,,,,,.,,ᴧ
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,­,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,<way
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,,,,,.,,,,,,<another way
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,always another way--------------=-------------------=-------------->
,,.,,,.,,,<is always another way--------------=-------------------=-------------->
<there is always another way--------------=-------------------=-------------->
,,.,,,.,,,<is always another way--------------=-------------------=-------------->
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,always another way--------------=-------------------=-------------->
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,,,,,.,,,,,,<another way
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,<way
,,.,,,.,,,,,.,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,,,.,,,,,,,,,,,,,.,,v
.....................................................way
178 · Apr 2019
revenant
Ciel Noir Apr 2019
death is the shadow of life
the silent darkness
of the sky

falling
into emptiness
life is the revenant of death
177 · Jun 2019
machines
Ciel Noir Jun 2019
today
my head is full
of the sound
of machines
they are everywhere I go
in the world
my home
and my   dreams
177 · May 2019
void
Ciel Noir May 2019
deepest night
where the sky is a color
that we cannot see
177 · Mar 2022
Your Light
Ciel Noir Mar 2022
I want to be the sign
at the center of your sky

I want to be your lullaby
I want to be your night

I want to give you what you want
Tonight and every night
I want to shine

I want to be a diamond in your light
176 · Apr 2019
Cherry Tree
Ciel Noir Apr 2019
Like the Moon
Blooming soft and delicate
Earth kissing the sky
176 · Jul 2019
the abyss gazes
Ciel Noir Jul 2019
shadow keep
the eye of the hurricane
in a storm of stars

drawing deep
waves into the darkest sea
also into you
176 · Jan 2019
Go
Ciel Noir Jan 2019
Go
On a ledge
Wings outstretched
At the edge
Of the nest

Will I fall
Will I go
In a moment
I will know
175 · Jun 2021
Feelings
Ciel Noir Jun 2021
I have all these scary feelings
I wish I could understand
I wish I could control
but without them
I would have
no soul


175 · Sep 2018
Lily
Ciel Noir Sep 2018
Lily bright
Sparkle with exotic spice
Sweeten the twilight
175 · Mar 2024
Love Me
Ciel Noir Mar 2024
do not love me for my face
love me for my ways
my grace

do not love me for my looks
love me for my art
my books

do not love me because I'm young
love me for what I've said and done

love me for something deep
love me
love me for something I can keep
175 · Jun 2018
Country
Ciel Noir Jun 2018
You love your country
I'm sure that you do
I'm sure they all loved
Their countries too

You love your country
That's how you explain it
You love your country
And I love my planet
175 · Sep 2018
More
Ciel Noir Sep 2018
Some people are happy just to have dinner
Others eat cake and wish they were thinner
Some people are happy with just one love
Others need everyone to lift them up above
Some people are happy just to sleep inside
Others mad at their mansions because of their pride
Some people are so grateful for what they've got
That it makes even a little seem like a lot
Others may seem to have the most
But they always need MORE
Like a hungry ghost
175 · Dec 2021
.
Ciel Noir Dec 2021
.
.



                          I will not speak my mind again
                          I will not speak my mind again        
                          I will not speak my mind again    
                          I will                                            



           ­                                            .
175 · May 2018
After the Rain
Ciel Noir May 2018
I am calm
The storm that tore at my soul
Rains itself to sleep

Deep sorrow
Poured out on the dusty ground
I am full of peace
174 · Mar 2019
Mind
Ciel Noir Mar 2019
A rush of electricity
Which moves me like an avatar
A whirl of wound up energy
Ricochets round the reservoir

Staccato static symphony
Sound of the soul sparkles like stars
Voltage vibrates inside of me
The lightning in the leyden jar
174 · Dec 2021
Gold
Ciel Noir Dec 2021
There is a land of industry
Of wealth and peace and harmony
A confluence of new and old
Where the streets are paved with gold

Work and work day in, day out
Work to build your little house
Hurry, for the night is cold
Where the streets are paved with gold

The government is on your side
Nothing and nowhere to hide
So do and say what you are told
Where the streets are paved with gold

Swallow your national pride
Do not fly the flag too high
The consequences are well known
Where the streets are paved with gold

The echoes of what happened here
Frozen in memory of fear
Are waiting everywhere you go
Where the streets are paved with gold

Do not question, do not grumble
Look to the ground and stay humble
Lest you stumble on a stone
Where the streets are paved with gold
174 · May 2018
Party
Ciel Noir May 2018
When you're a centrist
Everyone agrees
Cause everybody thinks you're wrong

When you're a centrist
Everyone agrees
Cause they all say you don't belong

But if you talk to one person at a time
And bring them just a little toward the middle
One step at a time
Before they know it they're on your side

Take your left hand
Reach as far as you can
But don't give up your ground

Take your right hand
Reach out to the right side
Don't let them pull you around

And then connect two hands at a time
Make a chain that snakes its way across the middle
One link at a time
Before they know it they're all entwined

There is so much
Space here in the middle
All of you can stand with me

There is so much
We can do together
Without this dichotomy

It happens one day at a time
Shifting just a little toward the middle
After enough time
There aren't that many sitting on the sides

Why not get up and move around
And mingle just a little in the middle?
One big fabulous party, we'll be
Dancing in the aisle
173 · Aug 2018
All
Ciel Noir Aug 2018
All
All the Universe is wonderful
All the Universe is like a dream
All the Universe is beautiful
All the Universe including me
173 · Feb 5
I Need Help
Ciel Noir Feb 5
sometimes I can
will my fury away
I can
push down my tears
ignore pain
vivisect my shame

I don't know what to do with fear

I feel it
how it clenches at my guts
how it speeds up my heart

it t t twitches in my face
I feel it pulling me apart

I know it is counterproductive
only hurts my chances
I tell myself to calm down

I can't

that only makes me feel more anxious

only makes my breath more shallow
only makes my heart beat faster
only I can help me
but

I can't

this is a disaster

I am too afraid
I am too afraid to trust myself
too afraid to trust the process
too afraid to ask for help

too afraid to ask
but
I need help
is a statement of fact

I need help

I am here
to find out what to do with fear
173 · May 2018
War Knell
Ciel Noir May 2018
War bells
Clanging hollow
Over the horizon
Low like a gong
Swelling like madness
My tears are silent
They do not drown the sound
They only blur the hurried words
That make my faint heart shiver
And my blood run cold
173 · Dec 2021
Angel
Ciel Noir Dec 2021
I wish I believed
that there was more
to sacrifice for
eternal reward

I wish I believed
that if I believe
the angel of death
pass over my door
173 · Jun 2018
Probability
Ciel Noir Jun 2018
somewhere between
0 and 1
probability
172 · Feb 2023
Letting Go
Ciel Noir Feb 2023
I'm not so good
at letting go
and when I care
I let it show

it takes so much more
mental effort
just to say
"OK whatever"

than to plan and scheme and work
and dream of ways
to make you smile

I promise I'll let go of you
but it will take me
quite some while
172 · Oct 2023
Conditional
Ciel Noir Oct 2023
I judge myself
more harshly than
I would judge anybody else

I made an innocent mistake
so I must not deserve success

I try and try and still I fail
so I am just not good enough

it's hard to build relationships
so I am too broken to love

I try so hard to learn and grow
to do better
to do my best

if I were someone else
it would be easy to forgive myself

and I should love myself
even if I do not seem 'good enough'

to love no matter what
that is the most important kind of love
172 · Aug 2023
How Far
Ciel Noir Aug 2023
I know where you came from
and I'm not here to judge
I know sometimes the road was hard
sometimes there was no road at all

when you kept walking through that storm
I know how much that took
just take a breath
lay down your head
I see how far you've come
171 · Feb 2023
I thought
Ciel Noir Feb 2023
I thought I could be with someone
But I was wrong
I thought that I could accept love
But I was so wrong
How could I believe
After so long?
How could I feel so much hope?
How could I have been so wrong?
171 · Jun 2019
Life
Ciel Noir Jun 2019
I hope for
thousands of living planets
life is beautiful
170 · Jan 2023
Over the Land of Night
Ciel Noir Jan 2023
Cassiopeia seems to melt
from the sky
to the ink black sea

radiant luminescent beams
a fiery crown for a dark Queen

but that pale fire is strange and green
and nothing like what I have seen

all the way from the horizon
to above my airplane window
this unearthly apparition
shows the shape of one dark wing

glowing
hovering and growing
moving like a living thing

in my mind and to my eye

alien
aware
alive

a strange and bright and haunting sight
a hundred miles
above the sea
170 · Feb 2022
Again
Ciel Noir Feb 2022
we've read this story
we know how it ends

we learn this lesson
again and again

time after time
after time till the end

till no one learns anything
ever again
170 · Jun 2019
Spiraling
Ciel Noir Jun 2019
there is nothing I have done
that nobody else has done
we all look at the same Moon
we all look at the same Sun

there is nothing in this place
that really is all my own
spiraling through time and space
nobody is all alone
170 · Sep 2020
Pendulum
Ciel Noir Sep 2020
those whom we did not defend
today are the ones who attack
no matter how much we pretend
the pendulum always swings back
170 · Dec 2023
One Small Step
Ciel Noir Dec 2023
I know you do not like it
when your friends become assertive

And start to set more boundaries
and to say what we mean

You really didn't like it
when the pawn became the knight

Best turn your head away
before I turn into a queen
169 · May 2020
>>
Ciel Noir May 2020
>>
I never say your name
I am afraid
my voice will break

trip on a trill
stammer and still

skip

a beat and spill
repeated syllables
from trembling lips
I know that if I

slip

I'll show the whole world
how I feel
169 · Sep 2019
Underworld
Ciel Noir Sep 2019
a dark place
how long do I want to stay
twelve seeds in my hand
169 · Nov 2024
Empty
Ciel Noir Nov 2024
argue with myself
because I want more
and I got more
and still want it

what's the point of that?
control myself
until I run out of logic

look outside myself
my vices line up to tempt me

in my mind I know I've had enough
but I'm hungry
not hungry

empty

I am made of nothing
and the nothing I am made of is
empty

empty as the sky
empty as the light

I am empty

god has no mind
god rolls dice
no one knows me
no one sent me

and the light shines right through me
and it shows me
I am empty
169 · Apr 2019
Four Dimensions
Ciel Noir Apr 2019
If someone saw in four dimensions
I wonder what they would see
And if they looked at us
Would they see not one person
But a tree

With all our lives laid out together
Branching back mother to mother
Back to when we became humans
Where our branch joins with the others

Would they see not just our timeline
But those of the molecules
Which branching back away from us
Return to plants and animals

And if they looked far back enough
Would they see us all join as one
Woven upon the helix Earth
Which wraps around the spiral Sun
169 · May 2024
Only Me
Ciel Noir May 2024
It's scary
I already have my doubts
that I could ever really be enough

I am afraid of losing what I am
of never again being what I was

afraid to face you without this armor
I freeze within my fear like a coward

how can I come to you as only me
what would I be to you without my power
168 · Jun 2018
Reflections
Ciel Noir Jun 2018
We are the Universe and so

When we look at the Universe

The Universe looks at the Universe

When you look into two mirrors that face one another

You see an infinite number of reflections

How many reflections

Does the Universe see?

Infinity to the power of infinity
168 · Aug 2020
Before
Ciel Noir Aug 2020
I was already someone
before I knew you

I didn't always remember

when I read my old poems
I understand her

I know

I love her and
I want to meet her once again
168 · Jul 2018
Default
Ciel Noir Jul 2018
If evil is
The default state
Then good is only
A byproduct
Of evil
Which life
Works
To create
168 · Sep 2019
Equinox
Ciel Noir Sep 2019
in the Sun
I do not know who I am
who I have become

in the dark
I can feel its tangled roots
deep within my heart
168 · Jun 2018
Winding Road
Ciel Noir Jun 2018
Life is incredibly confusing and complicated and scary
We are able to go on living because we are
Clever and courageous and strong
It's OK to admit sometimes that life is difficult
Sometimes we don't know what it means
Or if it's worth it to find out
But still we keep trying
Not because life is easy or straightforward or clean
But because there is no sense in not trying
If you are already falling
You might as well try to fly
And sing your own song all the way to the ground
168 · Jul 2018
Alone
Ciel Noir Jul 2018
If I could reach out
Connect to all of you alike
Weave the world into one web
Then I could never run away again

If I could mould you
Into one whole
Where could I go
To be alone
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