In the flood canoe rescue,
Great Britain take the lead,
In the pilfering of houses,
We get gold for the greed,

In the skeleton were top,
As the food runs out to quick,
For children and the aged,
The poor and the sick,

Sandbag filling quickness,
We have that one to,
The army lads champion that,
The royals helped with a few,

Evacuation sprint,
Won by counties, five,
Death toll medal to follow,
When we see who's left alive,

Loss of homes and business,
Unmentionable amount,
Mental scars and sadness,
Impossible to count,

Top gold medal for Cameron,
For deserting the British clan,
And top gold for foreign aid,
Given by this man,

No takers for foreign help gold,
But the world can see our plight,
And yet we are the first to aid,
When other countries are in the *****,

So well done rich safe government,
Your truly an all gold winner,
For the country that was fought for,
You watch as your land becomes thinner.

He promised me an everlasting love,
And a life full of dreams and wishes,
Instead I've got a load of washing,
And a sink full of ***** dishes,

He promised me a romantic dinner,
New dress and my hair in wisps,
Instead I've got me jarmie's on,
With a can and cheese and onion crisps,

He promised me a dozen roses,
And choccie's in a box,
Instead it's a bunch of daffodils,
And a pair of Simpsons socks,

He promised me a lovely house,
With sweeping gardens serene,
Instead I've got a council flat,
But my wheelie bins are green,

He promised me a spa weekend,
His time in me invested,
We ended up in the local pub,
At the end of the night, arrested,

But after all is said and done,
Were stuck together like glue,
We haven't got material things,
But the love we have is true.

Neknomination its a sensation of the younger generation,
But how foolish and ghoulish trying to act coolish,
They drink sin after sin after sin from a bin, chin chin,
So wrong, along with the urging and surging from people emerging,
From the gutter, they stutter, he's a total ******........
DRINK,
Don't think,
Of the consequence, or comeuppance, don't repent,
It's meant to be fun, watch this son, I'll have another one,
Don't do it, but they do it,
Please,
He's on his knees, beginning to wheeze,
It's not good, he's spewing up blood, I knew he would,
But then the devils been chased from his den, he's not after men,
He wants the young, they'll get stung by his poisonous tongue,
Then it's done,
To late,
That wasn't great was it mate,
Neknomination it's an abomination for the younger generation.

I want to hurt you, desert you, socially disgrace you,
Shame you, break you, and publically deface you,
Simply and quite easily displace you,
But I can’t,

I want to beat you, delete you, silently defeat you,
Spite you, fight you, locally expedite you,
Gently and easily overwrite you,
But I can’t,

I want to kick you, flick you, psychotically brick you,
Nab you, grab you, franticly jab you,
Smiling as I lovingly stab you,
But I can’t,

I want to grin, watch blood soak in, laughing within,
Delighting in my sin, comfortably rock...in,
As, I picture you in your coffin,
But I can’t,

But I can wait; I’m at the gate, of fate,
Don’t be late……………

Your not only tarred by the clothes you wear,
It's colour if skin and style of hair,
It's your walk your talk or accent you speak,
It's your ****** gender, your strength or your weak....ness,
If your a hoody a goody or an old fuddy duddy, you are judged,

Your not only judged by the way you live life,
It's the size of your house, your car or your wife,
It's your stance your glance or posture indeed,
It's your choice of career, obligation or greed....yness,
If your a banker a tanker or just the local ******, you are labelled,

Your not only labelled by what I have said,
It's by where you have shopped or where you dropped dead,
It's the illness, the sickness, the disease that you had,
It's your funeral, communal, whether good or bad....ness,
If you have drive, are contrive, want to survive, get out of the beehive.

Tina Ford

Nothing could explain this sight,
Overspills of different light,
Reaching out for miles around,
Transmitting light without a sound,
Heavy thoughts fill my mind,
Explanations I cannot find,
Rolling over the clear night sky,
Northern lights pass me by,
Languishing in this beauty alone,
Isolated and away from home,
Green and silent creeping by,
Hovering so lonely, I sit and sigh,
Thinking to myself what beautiful sights,
Sights I remember, oh northern lights.

We could go the flicks the local dance,
Walk someone home if we got the chance,
Bus trip there then back home again,
Chips in newspaper, sheltering from rain,
All this for two bob,

We could have a night at the pub, a good sing song,
Drink ***** beer, all night long,
Have a cuddle and kiss in the back room snug,
If we were lucky enough, get more than a hug,
All this for two bob,

We could take a trip into Liverpool on the eighty six,
Go into woollies for a pic and mix,
Take the ferry to Seaforth and back to shore,
What a great life, could ask for no more,
All this for two bob,

We could go the iron door and jive to the beat,
That sixties sound cannot be beat,
Get a glimpse of the Beatles now and then,
But they weren’t that famous back then.
And all this for two bob,

Not many people know what two bob is,
I will tell you now remember this,
Don’t go shouting it over the fence,
But two bob is only nowadays ten pence.

Tina Ford