Scattered points and sharp edges,
A body never lies.
The spaces in between soft and
Warm and
Welcoming
It’s also in your eyes.
Crevices hold darkness and
Secrets hide within
Luckily you don’t have many
For some reason or another
You chose to let me in.
Every mole and whisper of a freckle
Discovered in the dark
Is another story, yet untold,
Finding them now
Is an art.
The hairs across your body
Took time for you to love
Sometimes shaving
Sometimes leaving
What once you were embarrassed of.
As comfort levels increase
And masks keep coming off,
Details ever smaller show,
More for me to love.
Little “flaws” and blemishes
A body never lies
Every mark, a part of you
Perfection in my eyes.

I made it so far
But then I got to the beach and craved
Insanity.
From there to the end
My natural getting-home-from-work reaction was to
Crack open a beer
I think I felt like at that point
The fumes knew me better than you did,
And for them at least I didn’t have to
Explain myself.
I ****** up enough meals that I gave the cooking duties
To you.
Maybe if you pay attention to the stove you won’t look at my face not looking at you
Not knowing what to do,
How many times I avoided eye contact
Always trying to find something to point out
So it looked like I at least had some sort of reason
Just covering up the treason
That I probably should’ve felt bad for.
Feeling bad and feeling paranoid
Are not the same thing
And I only felt one of the two.
Flat beer
Old wine
Lukewarm liquor
I never knew a sink full of ***** dishes could spark such a fire
Scars left from burns can still feel phantom warmth.
The smell of burning butter
Not even a diet change could fix what was going wrong
A suggestion made for “health reasons”
You’ll never know what I was patching up.
I never knew how much hope could be contained
In eight ounces of soybean mush.
Now I’m back to where I was before
Only sometimes self-medicating to the point of remembering what it’s like
To not remember
But never sad to remember
What it’s like to wake up next to her.

I want to kiss you when you're smiling.
It seems like you hold the happiness of the universe
In the lines at the corners of your lips
And if I kiss you maybe I'll get a taste.
So far it seems
That it's been working

You pick your lips.
From worry or anxiousness
Or just plain boredom
I may never know
But
If I were with you I would glue your lips to mine
With love that tastes like honey
With care that smells like a bud before it blooms
With hope that this thing will work out
Until you forget
Why your lips are chapped in the first place

Time apart creeps
Like a candle slowly burning
But the thought of next year coming
Makes my chest ache with an emptiness
That knows not even cobwebs

There are so many things about us
To be afraid of
But when I look at you
All I notice
Is that our eyes
Make love.

Our eyes make love when they meet
And you never look away

When did I become so fond
of the blush and the delay
That comes as the result of a few
Good
Strong
Drinks.

When did I start to like having
An excuse
For the
Stupid
Things I do.

The burn of the drink
The blur of the drink
Blurs the lines
Blurs the memories
Blurs the feelings.

Was it when I started questioning
You?
Was it when I realized that I'd shut off
The feeling of missing you for so long
That it just stopped existing at all?
Was it when I promised myself to you
In a hurry?
The same way you gave me the ring?
Was it when I didn't acknowledge that I wasn't ready yet.

Or was it a long long time ago
Was it before I was even born
We all know it's in my blood
But I did so well ignoring 'my destiny'
For so long
For so long that I didn't care.

Did I not care?
Or was I just too worried about you and her to care
Was I just putting off caring
For the day that
I didn't care
Anymore

When did I become so fond of this haze