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 Mar 2013 Cera Wood
indelible ink
Sometimes when I look back I realize that those heartbreaks I got were because of the way I was..
Too straightforward
Too clingy
Too caring
Too loving
I can remember the discomfort in those eyes when I announced the relation
Was I too much to handle?
Was it shameful? To have me? I could nt wonder more I can't ..
Bringing me back to the present .. The past haunting me .. Telling me my mistakes .. Telling me what I should not do .. Telling me to place my heart in a safe box.. And the one willing to open it will find the key ...
But who has ever learned ? Heartbreak after Heartbreak ... Tears after Tears .. What you do learn is how to become more vulnerable .. How someone shows you one act of love and you are yet again on your knees begging for attention... Begging for more ...
its been
moments since I thought about you
in any capacity
minutes since
I remembered some portion of our story
hours since I felt anger
days since I tried to pick up my phone
weeks since I last contacted you
months since we last touched.

its been

months since you crushed me
weeks since I put on the brave face
days since I longed for you
hours since I spoke of you
minutes of starring into a blank screen
silently pleading
moments before all this is behind me again.

It’ll be

Moments of weakness
when I think about “us”
Minutes of silent cursing
while you run through my mind
Hours of rationalizing
before I let it go
Days of depression

I know

Weeks of emotions crammed into a few minutes
Months of self doubt and insanity

Soon it’ll be

years

But I’ll always have


the



tears.
The day is cold
In this my hour of need
I want to curl up in my heart
And let the pain wash over me

I got no sleep last night
Feeling the bleeding of my heart
Let the darkness fill my sight
Let me fall apart

Maybe now the pain will stop
Maybe that is what I need.
If the cold knife is all it takes,
Then I don't know what's stopping me.

Just let me sleep forever
And let the darkness win.
No one would miss me anyway
They'd be happy once again.
You would think
I'd feel unloved
Because I'm always against the ground
But in fact
I prefer this view
It's quite nice if you know where to look

Most would see
The filth
The grime
The chaos
But I see
The textures
The colors
The secret passageways
The places leading nowhere
And everywhere

You never know
Where we'll go
Or what we'll see
But I manage to see things
Differently
Maybe it's because
My speed is faster
Than yours
Everything passes
In a flash

The world seems different
When you're right
On
The
Ground
 Mar 2013 Cera Wood
Brittani
Always
 Mar 2013 Cera Wood
Brittani
I think I might have made a mistake
A painfully ugly mistake.
I understand if you are angry
I understand if you are upset
I know my words were hurtful
I hope, in time, you will be able to forget

So, I am offering you an apology
A weak, sad, sorry excuse for one.
I am apologizing for wasting your time
I am apologizing for leading you on
These were never my intentions
But, I do realize that I was wrong

If you remember nothing else:
Remember that I will always be here for you.
I will always be willing to listen
I will always be willing to exhort
Even if we go ten years without speaking
You will always have my support.
I knew a simple soldier boy
Who grinned at life in empty joy,
Slept soundly through the lonesome dark,
And whistled early with the lark.

In winter trenches, cowed and glum,
With crumps and lice and lack of ***,
He put a bullet through his brain.
No one spoke of him again.

You smug-faced crowds with kindling eye
Who cheer when soldier lads march by,
Sneak home and pray you'll never know
The hell where youth and laughter go.
 Mar 2013 Cera Wood
DM Pierce
He sees the world as her backdrop,
And loves her wholly.
She knows that and wants to love him back, but
All she can feel is lonely.

As he sleeps she cries in
Tight, silent heaves in rhythm
With his chest as he breathes.
His face is lit from neon light,
Slipping through a slit on the strung-up sheet--
An eye to the street,
And to everything that's beyond this life that she leads.
But she needs him and
Please, she begs, Have him
Hate me, at least.  I'm weak--
I'll linger until he throws me away,
Because at least then I can say
That it wasn't my choice, but
Everything must fade.


She goes on a walk every night now,
Riddled with complexes and smoking,
Eyes roving with 2AM mascara,
Wearing a spring dress in dead winter.
Head down in a crowd, aware
Of herself existing only when men stare.
They crave for her, she craves for him,
Her sadness, a narcotic magnetism.

She drowned off the coast
Of the island in her kitchen.
She weighed herself down with
Her faults like mountains and
Yellowed ambition.
 Mar 2013 Cera Wood
Kyla
Incomplete
 Mar 2013 Cera Wood
Kyla
Incomplete is my love for you,
always longing for more to hold onto.

Incomplete is the way I see the world
so many corners , doors and windows not explored.

Incomplete is the way you smile,
lies told dancing across your lips.

Incomplete is the cold wind,
stalling the snow stealing the leaves.

Incomplete are my hands,
gaping holes between my fingers.

Incomplete is the night,
sleep lost on its journey.

Incomplete is this poem,
for your eyes may see it, but your heart will never know it.
Because of you
I understand what a broken heart feels like.  
Mine
Shattered
The moment you walked out of my door,
My life,
My arms,
But not my heart.  

I still love you.
I love your smile,
The way your eyes used to light up
When I walked into a room,
And how you held me
When I cried.

And I miss you.
I miss the feeling
Of your hand in mine,
Those perfect goodnight kisses,
And the sound of your voice
When you said my name.

But you,
You love her.

And so I try
To hold together
The pieces of my broken heart,
And I try to stop the flow
Of a million tears down my cheeks,
But I can't keep it together anymore.  
I can't keep this plastic smile on my face
While my world crashes down around me.

I love you
With the kind of crazy love
That I used to believe
Only existed in fairy tales,
But you left me here,
Wasting away in a tower room
Without even the hope
That a prince will ride by
And rescue me,
Because the only one
With the key
That unlocks these walls around my heart
Is you.

So I lie on the floor,
Wishing
That I was enough for you,
But I guess I'm not.
Not anymore.  

There was a time
When you swore
That you would never leave me,
But that day is long gone.  

The final notes of our spinning,
Ballroom dance
Have played out,
And I'm standing here,
In an empty room,
Alone.
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