I'm afraid to ask for more
Just in case you might leave
I find myself often unattached
So I wouldn't lose more pieces of me
I anticipated you would leave
More than you would stay
It's a belief instilled in me
That sadly won't go away
It's hard to trust people
When I trust them to leave
It is hard to depend on them
When I expect to be deceived
The love that I am used to
Doesn't seem like love at all
It feels like something you lose to
Something encased within my walls

Sometimes I feel hollow and empty
The beating sensation of my heart
Is but a rattling noise in my chest
Nothing to keep it still
Nothing to keep it in place
Strings of the heart
Torn and severed
Tangled within its own
My heart lies in a pile
Of strings untied

The first time I fell for you
All the love songs made sense
My feelings expressed in the lyrics
My love expressed with someone else's words
Your image comes to mind every time
Strengthened by its soundtrack
My illusion grows stronger
As it latches on to a song
That song has become yours
I sing to it
Hoping you would listen
So you could sing along
We would make perfect harmony
But it wasn't your genre
Now I listen to them
Again, they are just songs
Someone else's words
No longer hold my feelings

Why am I called a funny girl?
When my humour is as dry
As the pages of a book
Or Gaston's flirtatious lies
Is it because people laugh
Before words even escape my mouth
That reading is ridiculous
How could such a woman be allowed?
To the characters in the stories
They do not laugh or judge me
They share my thirst for adventure
How I wish my life would be more lively
Every morning is a routine
That requires no risk to take
If I settle and rot in this tiny town
It would be my biggest mistake
My books are like tiny windows
In lives I wish to live
I just wanted something new for a change
Something more than this town can give

I like to explore books untouched
Every page is like taking another step
Every chapter is like completing a mile stone
Building a world I don't know yet
The author is my tour guide
Their words build my map
I create distinct images
New locations and people overlap
I meet new characters
I become someone different
Immersing myself in paper adventures
Makes reading much more intimate

Childlike innocence
Childlike wonder
I want to travel back to that time
A simpler time
Simple yet imaginative, so creative
A world solely mine
That is my wanderlust

Sometimes I want to be lost and forgotten
To be free to roam and wander
No responsibility attached
No obligation left behind
To be erased from all the memories I reside in
From all the hearts I took refuge in
I have this innate, uncompromising selfish desire
To be free, from everything