Tucked in quiet corners,
I'll keep you locked in spaces
My mind makes up
To convince me to go to sleep.

I showed you the dream box
My brother gave me for Christmas
I cried talking about the note he had written
I cried telling you about the maps he had hand glued inside
To remind me wherever I go,
My family would be with me
I thought about the rivers and roads
The valleys and mountain tops
The blue papers described
I pointed with my finger where my sisters belonged,
Where my mother lived,
Where I could find my brother
I realized there were no actual pinpoints,
That my father could move anywhere on the map,
And that there were things on the map I hadn't given a name to quite yet
I want to put you there,
Pin you down,
Give you a name the same way I'd given one to the rest of my family
I guess I'm writing this to ask you a question
I'm asking you to stay

You were always my favourite
I knew how you wanted to kiss me
And be with me
I felt each flare you sent ablaze into the night sky
I felt it sting me and I felt the burn
As tears crept from my eyes
There's so much about you
That I never wanted to lose;
So much so that I nearly let you
Break my knees so I'd never be free
Even tangled in your snare I asked to stay
I just wanted to stay
I only wanted to stay

Sorry you grew up feeling lonely
Sorry you had to cover up the fact that
You're so desperate for love,
You'll find it in any blonde
That treats you like you're worth nothing

You were worth something to me

I'm going to get married you know,
I'm going to see the world like you told me to
(But not for you)
And I'm going to get married,
But not to you

I knew it was going to hurt
And I let it.

I also know
Pain
Makes us grow

I am strong when I am sad.
But this is not how I feel.
If my dust-speckled, sunflower eyes
Are your heaven,
Then you know the things I see
When I'm alone
Like grainy black and white films

You see, when I was with you
And we were alone
And the lights were dim
And everything had settled,
There was no time for dust to
Sparkle across my doubts
It was only us

Now I have only time,
Time to think about your cornflower eyes
Time to think about the way it felt to be kissed
Time to wonder if I'm wasting all my time
And I swore I needed this,
I swore I needed time