It hurts it hurts
It hurts to know its over
What we were
What we are
Nothing last forever
I wanted us to last forever
Tug pull tug pull
I can't take it

She's a beautiful disaster
Pale skin blue eyes
Dark messy hair
She wants to be someone else
You can see it in her sad eyes
The way her smile curves a little at the edges
The way she talks
Not what she says
But the tone she uses
She wants to be someone else
Someone prettier
Someone calmer
Someone someone other than me
    
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I can never tell when you're staying or leaving
Slowing or going
You got my mind going crazy
Heart not knowing where you're going
Just knowing one thing
What my heart wants
Staying going never leaving
Green light red light with my emotions
Never know where to go
But I know how I feel
But where do I go with it all
Go fast Slow down
I never know

I have this same recurring dream
And you are always in it
Mostly its us cuddled together
Legs over legs
Fingers laced together
You holding me
Sometimes Im crying
Sometimes were laughing
But all the time Im happy with you
I talk about my life
My childhood memories
I want you to know every part of me
Sometimes I want to give up
Because loving you this much hurts
But I can't imagine life without you
Because without you
I couldn't imagine
And that's why it hurts so much

I feel this way
You feel this way
Im scared to feel this way
Just to let it all go
And be with you with no worries
It scares me
It scares me that I need you
That you are the only thing that makes sense
That you're the one
I feel like I'm diving in ice water blind folded
Not knowing what will happen
Trying to find something wrong
Where everything is right
Driving us both crazy

I'm sorry you fell for such a selfish girl
I wish I knew how to show you that I care
Because I care I do
I think I love you
I wish I weren't so selfish
So I could show it
Because my heart beats for you
I want to be that girl for you the one you need
The one that knows how to show she cares
I wish I could be that girl for you
Because your that guy for me
You give me everything and more
Even when I dont deserve it

I treat you badly because I'm thinking about myself
Im trying to keep you and thats all I think about
Instead of you and your feelings
Its not that I don't care because I do
And I do think about you
But I let my obsessiveness over take that
I guess Im saying I care in a different  way
I worry and obsess that's how I show I care
Through the same questions over and over
The more I ask the more I care
I obsess more when I care more
Its something I need to work on I know
I worry that I worry to much
And its killing me and its killing you
And I'm sorry for that I am