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Dec 2018 · 460
2019 - New Year
Ruheen Dec 2018
It's a new year,
So new beginnings.
I'm still here,
But things will be different.

In with the new,
Out with the old.
My only resolution:
Stay warm when cold.

Who knows?
Maybe this year'll be fun?
Happy new year,
To everyone!
Happy New Year! Things don't feel different, but I'm gonna make sure they will be. Enjoy your year!
Also, I have a question. See if you can answer it. What did I mean when I said: Stay warm when cold???
Dec 2018 · 1.2k
Rest In Pieces
Ruheen Dec 2018
Goodbye, everyone.
The girl I used to be is gone.
All that's left is her pieces.
Too many left to miss.
Now a dark abyss,
Her mind still exists.
I would say she's better off dead
But she's still stuck in my head.
Now my fears are constantly fed.
There's so much I regret.
She's broken,
Too broken to fix.
She won't come back,
So you're stuck with this.
Rest in peace, old me.
While I rest in pieces.
The pieces you left behind.
The pieces you never needed.
The old me is gone, but she's still here. In the back of my mind feeding my fear of not being good enough because she was good enough. I changed a lot and I can't go back even if I wanted to. I can't be that person again...I don't how.
Dec 2018 · 321
What's Worse Than Death?
Ruheen Dec 2018
Being dead is better than being forgotten.
What's worse is being remembered by all your flaws.
I thought life was hard and death was easy.
Maybe I was wrong.
Maybe death isn't so easy after all.
Just a thought.
Dec 2018 · 1.3k
I'm Not Yours
Ruheen Dec 2018
I'm visibly invisible,
Innocently uninnocent,
Bitterly bittersweet,
Scarily beautiful.
I'm misunderstood, yet understood.

I'm a lot of things, but I'm not yours.
So many people think that they know me enough to label me, to tell me what to do, to tell me what's wrong or right. They don't know anything. I don't belong to anybody.
Dec 2018 · 123
CONFUSED
Ruheen Dec 2018
Millions of thoughts, fighting in my head.
Which will I pick, to move ahead.
Words spilling, through my mouth.
Neither soft, nor loud.
No order, just my feelings,
Which, through my fingers, are leaking.
Yet I am still stuck, in the depths of my soul.
I'm writing, but I'm losing control.
Digging my nails into my palm,
I'm trying to breath and stay calm.
I open my hand and see the scars,
There's blood trickling down my arm.
Now I have an idea, at least I think I do,
But then again, maybe it's better I stay confused.
I don't know. Been saying that a lot lately. Make what you want of this.
Dec 2018 · 169
Heartbreak
Ruheen Dec 2018
Love is a blissful thing.
But when heartbreak comes around,
It becomes the most painful.

Although, sometimes, maybe the pain's worth it.
Just something I said to someone. Sounded poetic.
Dec 2018 · 90
Time Travel
Ruheen Dec 2018
Too bad we can't time travel,
There are a lot of mistakes I need to fix.
There's a lot I would want to say to the girl I used to be.

I wish she knew that her life was going to be hell.
But,
She didn't.

And the past is the past.
It's what made me who I am now,
And do I really want that to change?
Do I?
Dec 2018 · 435
Christmas (10W)
Ruheen Dec 2018
It's Christmas.
I should be happy today.
Just this once.
Merry Christmas! Enjoy your day! And....I'll try to enjoy mine. This is going to be hard.
Dec 2018 · 143
Human
Ruheen Dec 2018
Human nature is what makes us human -

Human nature is a bunch of characteristics.
Characteristics that include ways of thinking, feeling and acting,
Which humans have naturally.
It can lead to many things, both good and bad.

Is this what being a human is?

Fear, anger, love.
They aren’t weaknesses.
Without emotion,
We would just be empty shells of things that look like people.
Our thoughts,
Even the silliest ones,
Can lead to something big.
Every thought is important.
Our mistakes
Form us into who we’re meant to be.
Without mistakes,
We would never learn.

What does it really mean to be human?

To be human means having and showing emotion.
To be human means having the freedom of being whomever.
To be human means to accept all that you are.
To be human means to love and live freely.

Human nature. Being human. It makes us who we are.
Couldn't find the right inspiration. That's why I haven't been posting much. Didn't know what to write. I guess now I do. I think.
Dec 2018 · 159
Lost and Found
Ruheen Dec 2018
Some things stay lost
Because they don't want to be found.
Other things stay lost
Because there's no one's looking for them
I'm lost,
And I want to be found.
But no one knows,
So no one's looking.
.
Dec 2018 · 345
Broken Ice
Ruheen Dec 2018
I'm as whole as my heart,
Even if it's frozen.
But I've got cracks on my surface.
That show you I'm broken.

But broken ice is still cold,
So broken people can be too.
Broken ice is still ice.............
Dec 2018 · 322
Life and Death
Ruheen Dec 2018
You are the sun and I am the moon.
Life is the sun and death is the moon.

You are a lie and I am the truth.
Life is a lie and death is the truth.

You are a plague and I am the cure.
Life is a plague and death is the cure.

You are the light and I am the dark,
But death is easy and life is hard.
My take on life and death. Find your own meaning to my words.
Dec 2018 · 1.4k
I'm a Writer
Ruheen Dec 2018
Someone asked me if I was an artist.
If I liked to draw,
Because I had a sketchbook.
I shook my head and said, "No."
Then I said, "I'm a writer,"
"I like to imagine."
I have a sketchbook and I draw only because I imagine my words turning into images. It's a form of inspiration for me.
Nov 2018 · 3.8k
Pisces in Pieces
Ruheen Nov 2018
I'm a Pisces, so, here's me:

1. My heart is as cold as ice.
2. I fool people into thinking that they know so much about me, when in reality, they only know a fraction.
3. I'm afraid they'll devour me, so I devour myself.
4. I'm the saddest person, but I smile the brightest.
5. I'll never accept being second best for someone.
6. I'll either tell you exactly what I think, or stay silent.
7. I'll forgive, but never forget.
8. I want to escape reality, it's a gift and a curse.
9. Never underestimate me. I'm more than you think.
10. I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim.

I'm not who everyone thinks I am.
There's more to me than meets the eye.
Here's a Pisces in pieces.
I'm a Proud Pisces. Don't know if this is true for every other Pisces, but it is for me.
By the way, Pinterest helped a lot with the creation of this poem.
Nov 2018 · 320
I'm Sorry
Ruheen Nov 2018
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean what I said.
My life is just a mess,
So I'm living in my head.

I'm sorry.
For everything.
.
Nov 2018 · 934
Void
Ruheen Nov 2018
Nos autem non in vacuum cucurri caeca.
Perdidit in tenebris sumus.
Ex visus, ex animo.
Nos iam esset desperato.
This is a poem in my favorite language: Latin.
Things just sound better in different languages, don't you think?

Translation:
We didn't run in blind
We were lost in darkness
Out of sight, out of mind
We were already hopeless.
Nov 2018 · 141
I'm Counting Down
Ruheen Nov 2018
I'm counting down.
Only 10 seconds left.

10

Here he comes,

9

Holding a gun.

8

He tells me to choose.

7

I choose.

6

I feel the gun against my head,

5

And the knife against my neck.

4

I wait.

3

2

1

He doesn't shoot.
But I cut.
Based on a dream I had. Don't know what goes on in my head. Wish I did.
Nov 2018 · 285
'Bad' Weather
Ruheen Nov 2018
Darkened skies.
Grey clouds.

Waiting for the weather's cry.
It's going to be loud.

Rain falls.
Sun's far away.

That's not all,
Because the rainbow escaped.

Cold moon.
Dim stars.

It's about to end soon.
The ending's not too far.
It's raining right now, heavily, might I add. I got inspired.
I love the rain, but it also makes me sad sometimes. Especially when I'm in the mood for happy time (RARE) and I want a bright, sunny day.
It really does sound like the sky's angry. Zeus' got his ******* in a twist - again.
I love the darkness of it. But a bright day isn't too bad either.
Nov 2018 · 95
Say Something
Ruheen Nov 2018
Say something.
Anything.
I just need you to,

Say something.
Anything.
There's nothing I won't do,

To hear your voice,
Just one more time.
You need to realize,
A word will be just fine.
Just please,

Say something.
Anything.
So that I can let you go.
I don't know what compelled me to write this. I just sat down and it came out. As a song.
Nov 2018 · 309
They Did This.
Ruheen Nov 2018
When he first opened his eyes,
He knew nothing.
He didn't know that his choices
Would leave him dead.
He didn't know that he couldn't live his life.
He  didn't know he would be shunned.
Rather than being accepted.
He didn't know anything.

He didn't **** himself.
They did.
Blaming him for who he was.
Shutting him out.
It was all their doing.
The last time he closed his eyes
Was the last time he said goodbye.

The funny thing is,
That now, after he's gone
Is when they start feeling guilty.
When they start regretting what they did.
But it's too late.
Now, there's no one to hear their apologies,
But them.

It was their fault.
They did this.
Not him.
So many people say it's wrong or disgusting. They don't realize that they have no right to judge people based on what choices they make. It's their life. Their decision. Nothing can change that.
Nov 2018 · 595
Friendship
Ruheen Nov 2018
There is a time you realize
That you only called someone your friend
Because you saw them five days a week.

Friendship shouldn't be based on frequency.
It should be based on understanding.
Just a thought I had when someone I thought was my friend left me for the "popular crowd". She wasn't really a friend. I barely knew her and she didn't know me. She knew what everyone else knew.
Nov 2018 · 452
Suffocating
Ruheen Nov 2018
I'm so tired
Of the pressure and stress.
I don't want to do more.
I need to do less.

I'm suffocating,
In my own head.
School's just getting to me.
Nov 2018 · 12.0k
Underrated
Ruheen Nov 2018
Demons are just FALLEN ANGELS.
They fell
From HEAVEN to HELL,
And unlike angels,
DEMONS have a STORY to tell.
Good and evil.
It's just two sides of the same coin.
Nov 2018 · 1.9k
This Is Normal, Right?
Ruheen Nov 2018
I

Hear

Voices

In

My

Head.

Am

I

Losing

My

Mind?

Save me.
Not actually going crazy, but sometimes I feel like I already am.
Nov 2018 · 609
Locked In
Ruheen Nov 2018
No one can get in.
Nothing can get out.
My mind is a closed door.
It's all locked in.
The more people I let in, the more people can just walk out.
I'm a sociable person, but I don't trust easy.
Nov 2018 · 258
Today I Wrote Song
Ruheen Nov 2018
Today I wrote a song.
I hummed it to the birds.
They sang it back to me,
As sweet as they could.
I don't know. It just popped into my head and I wrote it down. Someone tell me what I meant.
Nov 2018 · 358
In Too Deep
Ruheen Nov 2018
I'm in too deep.
I can't touch the bottom with my feet.
But I'm not drowning,
I'm sinking in peace.

I'm in too deep.
I can't see what's around me.
I'm hidden in the folds
Of a deep blue sea.

I'm in too deep.
I can't hear the thrashing sea.
I'm just lost,
In the darkness around me.
Two words: My mind.
It's a metaphor.
Someone make sense of it.
Oct 2018 · 2.3k
Deconstruction
Ruheen Oct 2018
Poetry is universal.
Everyone speaks it, even if by accident.
Yet, hardly anyone understands it.
No one notices
The hidden meanings in every sentence,
And every word.
Sometimes, not even the poet.
There is more to every poem than meets the eye.
But deconstruction can only go so far.
Everyone has something to hide. Some, in my opinion, just choose to hide whatever it is, in their poems.
Oct 2018 · 1.2k
Hidden
Ruheen Oct 2018
I say that I'm happy.
I say that I'm fine.
But shouldn't it be obvious that I'm not?

Of course not.
I've been hiding my pain for years.

I think I'm a pro.
Because I'm dying inside,
And no one knows.

Pain is hidden behind a smile.
Everything else, behind a wall.
...
Oct 2018 · 1.2k
Perfection
Ruheen Oct 2018
If we always wanted perfection
We would never be satisfied.

PerfEctiOn doEsn'T MeAn sAtisFactIon.
Nothing is perfect and no one really ever wants perfect.
Oct 2018 · 121
Who Am I?
Ruheen Oct 2018
Who am I?
Am I the person everyone thinks I am?
Or am I the person I write about?
It's at times like these
When I am truly lost.
This speaks for itself.


.
Oct 2018 · 565
We All Bleed Red
Ruheen Oct 2018
We all make our own choices.
We all want different things.
But inside,
We are all the same.

We all hurt.
We all cry.
We all make mistakes.
We all forget.

We've all gotten hurt before
And we've all hurt someone.
We may seem different,
But we all bleed red.
We are all people. Even outcasts are human. I would know.
Sep 2018 · 282
Darkness
Ruheen Sep 2018
Shrouded in darkness.
My wall, my clothes and my thoughts.
I’m lost in darkness.
The girl they knew is gone.
Sep 2018 · 969
In The Mirror
Ruheen Sep 2018
What do I see when I look in the mirror?
I see a broken girl
Who's suffered lies.
I see a crying girl
Who's dead inside.
I see a bleeding girl
Who blames herself
And is blamed by everyone else.

What do I see when I look in the mirror?
I see a girl
Who may have lost hope.
I see a girl
Who's just afraid.
I see a girl
Who doesn't want to hide.
I see a girl
Who's been through too much
And is still alive.

In the mirror
I see myself,
Darkness and pain combined.
I don't actually know if I wrote about myself.
Maybe I did.
Sep 2018 · 186
I Can't
Ruheen Sep 2018
I can't think
I don't what to think

I can't speak
I don't know what to say

I can't write
I don't know the words

I can't listen
I don't know what to hear

I can't be normal
I don't know how
Sep 2018 · 878
Where Do I Belong?
Ruheen Sep 2018
I am a lost cause.
A human without purpose.
Where do I belong?
Even wanderers have a category.
Sep 2018 · 281
Memories
Ruheen Sep 2018
Lost in memories
Happy, sad and bittersweet
I'm losing my mind.
When memories become too much.
Sep 2018 · 95
When We Die
Ruheen Sep 2018
When we die, our secrets die with us.
As do our sweet lies and bitter truths.
Somehow, to me this makes sense.
Sep 2018 · 107
The Pain Is Gone.
Ruheen Sep 2018
Closed eyes,
Lost mind,
Bleeding heart,
Empty soul,
Open wounds,
Dark rooms,
Locked doors,

The pain is gone.
Sep 2018 · 134
Under the Water
Ruheen Sep 2018
Under the water
No one is watching.
Under the water
I'm not afraid.

Everything is so much quieter
When I'm under the water.
A thought I had while I was swimming in the water. It was so peaceful. I wish it was like that all the time. But I guess not.
Sep 2018 · 672
Fragile
Ruheen Sep 2018
"I'm a tough nut to crack.
Nothing can break me."
Is what I used to say.
Before they got into my head
And led me astray.

I'm as fragile as glass
                And I've already shattered.
                                           I'm as fragile as grass
                                                           ­ And as bruised and battered.

                    You can't break me because I'm already broken.
I was going to write more, but I just...didn't.
Sep 2018 · 346
What Am I Doing?
Ruheen Sep 2018
Sometimes, I'm just lost in my head
Don't know what's real and what's not
I just might be living a fantasy
Or drowning, oh so slowly

I don't know what I'm writing
I don't know what I'm saying
I might be dreaming
But what am I doing?

Sometimes, I'm just afraid
Of what I have to face
It may be a hallucination
A result of my frustration

I don't know what I'm feeling
I don't know what I'm seeing
It's too confusing
What am I doing?
I've got a lot going on and I'm just really tired. I feel like I don't know what I'm doing half the time. I feel so lost
Sep 2018 · 126
Remember
Ruheen Sep 2018
Remember those times
I had cried on your shoulders.
Do you remember?
Sep 2018 · 269
Hope (10W)
Ruheen Sep 2018
Hope keeps us waiting,
and it leaves us like that
Hope this makes sense.
Sep 2018 · 103
Never - Ending Words
Ruheen Sep 2018
I have lived many lives
I have escaped many times
Through the power of words

I have shed many tears
I have shared many fears
With the tales I've held in my hand

I have laughed many days
I have rejoiced many ways
Because of the emotions I've felt

I have waited many hours
I have wasted many thoughts
Just to let the ending sink in

But a real book never truly ends
The people never really leave
As for that to happen
Readers would have to not believe
This kinda explains how sometimes books are all we have. They're fantasies. They're an escape. Sometimes living someone else's life is better than living your own. Sometimes we need it.
Aug 2018 · 206
Beyond Us
Ruheen Aug 2018
Who knows?
Who knows what's beyond us?
Beyond the simple minds
Of average humans.

We can only do so much.
Aug 2018 · 423
Escape
Ruheen Aug 2018
I want to get out.
Out of this place.
But I can't right now.
I have too much to face.
I want to run.
Run far away.
But there's so much I've done.
So much in the way.
I want to escape.
Escape reality.
Escape everything
That's chasing after me.
Aug 2018 · 170
(Over)Thinking
Ruheen Aug 2018
I wish I could say
Whatever I wanted to.
So I could tell people
What I was going through.
I wish I could hit send
Without hitting delete
Over and over again,
But it never feels complete.
I wish I wouldn't think
I would just rhyme.
Then I wouldn't have to write the same words
A hundred times.
I just need to press enter sometimes.
Aug 2018 · 192
Because I'm Human
Ruheen Aug 2018
Even after everything you've done.
I'm still ready to forgive you.
Still ready to help you.
Why?
Because I'm human.
Forgive others. Not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace. - Unknown.
Aug 2018 · 1.2k
They're Not Just Nightmares
Ruheen Aug 2018
They're not just nightmares.
They won't let me sleep
And I'm not making an excuse,
But you don't get that.
I can't even close my eyes
Because I'm scared.

I'm scared
But I don't wake up screaming.
I just lie there
Like a corpse.
I feel like one too.
Because I'm cold.

Sometimes I feel
Hands clawing at my throat.
I feel like I'm breathing dirt.
Like I'm six feet under,
But I'm still breathing.
That's how I feel.

I'm not scared, I'm petrified.
Don't you see?
They're not just nightmares.
Part of the reason I don't get nine hours of sleep.
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