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i compliment the girls in the hallway
some wave
and some smile
and some don´t even say thanks
it doesn´t matter to me
because i know the words that i say
will stay inside the brains
of the girls who need to know
that they will be ok
just a few kind words might make someones day.
i take it to myself to compliment at least 3 people a day
thank you for reading this, i hope you can take it into your life to say just a few nice things to anyone, even if you don´t know them it might turn around their day
but don´t let the people who just turn away ruin your day. compliment yourself just as often. you are beautiful, you are brave, make everyday hold just a little more positivity
  Oct 2018 Carterrae aunders
Bo Burnham
Mid-October,
with leaves spilled
like colored pencil shavings ---

the streets dicing our town
into neat, unfair portions ---
and me, eatin' that *****.
i would rather write than speak
but i wish through these words you could hear me
i do not like to be
open, or vulnerable
and if you are reading my writing
please do not look at me
imagining these words rolling and flowing off the tip of my tongue
makes me
small, shrinking endlessly
into possibilities of you
and me
          and me
                    and you
you reading these words
makes me insecure, scared, and alone
i wish i had the voice to be heard
i am not scared of you
but of what you will think of me
the story goes
that van gogh would eat yellow paint
in hopes that it would
put happiness inside of him –
probably the same reason
he drank absinthe.

i never understood that level of desperation –
except i painted my fingernails yellow today
in hopes that sunshine
would flow from my fingertips
instead of the torrential downpour
that i’ve made a home out of.

but it only reminds me of van gogh
and new york city
and you –
lots of starry nights

who knew you had the power
to make everything feel so grey in your wake?

if you think about it,
all of us have our own yellow paint –
something we cling to for refuge
even though we know it’s killing us, slowly,
the temporary solace feels worth it
if only for a moment

and you were mine.

- courtney l. p.
the words i never thought
i would have the courage to write
https://courtneylpposts.tumblr.com/
  Jun 2018 Carterrae aunders
Triste
I fell in love with you
My ocean blue
Silent and deep
I will forever weep
For your heart I cannot keep
I need to talk to You.
it's been so long, why won't You text me?
why do You never text me first?
I feel like I'm losing You.
do You still love me?
I think I still love You.
it's hard to tell when You won't talk to me.

what have You been up to?
done anything fun?
all I've been doing is crying... I can pretend it's not over You.
if that makes You feel better.
I mean... it nothing, really.
anything for You.
We used to have fun, didn't We?
We couldn't stop laughing.
all the time, even at 2 in the morning.
it's been a while.

haha check out this video, and please please text me back this time.
I hate that I need this much validation.
I hate how much I need from You.
and how much You never give.
am I too needy? cause that's fair.

I'm sorry.
what did I do?
was it even anything?

can You just humor me and tell me every tiny detail of your day.
I want to know everything, don't leave a single thing out.
no matter how insignificant it may seem.

do You still love me?
You said You thought We would last a long time.
please
please
please
I love You
I love that freckle on your cheek and even your 4 day stubble.
I miss You
i miss seeing your face and feeling you hold me.
I need You
i need your kisses and the hugs i forced from you.
I want You
i want everything back, just like it used to be oh 7 months ago.
please come back
please
tell me how much you love, miss, need and want
me

please give me my heart back
i think i gave it to you too soon
I met him in college, now we're 9 hours away for the summer.
I feel like I'm losing him
but maybe I already have.

I wanted to say thank you to @mk who wrote "texts i never sent" parts i, ii, and iii for inspiring this one
Have you ever just sat and listened to a clock
Tick tock tick tock
I like to sit and listen to help me unwind
Tick tock tick tock
The sound is quite satisfying if you keep an open mind
Tick tock tick tock
You can sit and listen
To every second
And minute
And hour pass by
The only true constant in life is the theory of time
They say it will never stop but
How will we know if were all meant to die
Our life we live is in such a small glimps
But we all blindly abide by the passing time
A clock ticks like a heart beats and
I hope every tick tock, pump, and thump
Is a pulsing, pounding reminder that you are alive
So please do not give up before the end of your time
In the end everything will turn out fine
Tick tock tick tock
Tick tock
this is my first ever poem out in the public, give me lots of feedback please!!
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