~•§•~ Light Sleeper v2.0 ~•§•~
(song attempt/build)

One foot in the ground
One foot six feet deeper
With darkness all around
Fear's such a light sleeper
My fall never made a sound
Put the tree on loudspeaker
A picture doesn't last longer
If it's never a keeper

See here

Feeeearrr
Doesn't make a sound
What you heeeearrr
Is your spirit finally found
Get an eeeearrr...
...ful when you finally hear it
Just hope you survive it
And don't sound like a hypocrite

But that's just it
The stage is set
Place your bet
Guess what you get
You get
What you get
And that's just life
Yet we forget
How far we went
Can't repent
Good karma's spent
Left indecent
Ran the gauntlet
Pain's permanent
Still not been
Defeated yet

Think a sec

Feeeearrr
Doesn't make a sound
What you heeeearrr
Is your spirit finally found
Get an eeeearrr...
...ful when you finally hear it
Just hope you survive it
And don't sound like a hypocrite (x2)

©2024

They tell me, they promise me, I'm not alone
But I can only go by what I've always been shown
Unwanted, undesirable, freek show, just a small sample of all I've known
I wish my inner abuser would adapt another tone
I don't own my own thoughts, any positive feeling is only on loan

People act like I hone in on this curse to be worthless
Like I thirst to be anxious
Like I have to coerce this anger and bitterness
Like I enjoy being immersed in the hopeless
Like my first thought is the worst on purpose
Like I enjoy all my deep rooted issues constantly rising to the surface

Then comes the question that brings me back to reality
"What are you doing to get control of this? Not enough certainly"
Honestly that's another cog in the circle mosh pit of misery, part of the continuity
I'd give anything for it to be as easy as everyone claims it should be

Because what most people see from me is rehearsed
My final diagnosis can not be reversed
The totality of my issues couldn't possibly be unearthed
But that doesn't change the horrible landscape I've traversed
I wouldn't be able to tell you what I'm worth, all I know is...
...I am this, for what it's worth

©2024

My worst fear realized
Beyond scared & paralyzed
the moment I recognized
the signs in the fading eyes
of a lover as she re-lives the lies
& cries herself to sleep with sorrowful lullabies
Ones only heard by the clouds and the stars they pass by in the night skies
The ones just as lonely and as distant as a sunrise
on the moons romanticized dark sides
mingling with the anticipated replies to the backlog of "why's"
that don't even bother with fly-bys
Somewhere out past where hope dies
Where both love and hate are lobotomized
then cannibalized
even weaponized
for passion triggered crimes
leaving no one surprised
Where the only allies one finds
arrive in disguise
as the best of times
as the worst of times
building up to a multitude of inevitable good-byes
How was I to vocalize
a mess of this size
when I don't have the ability to visualize
even loosing such a prize...

©2024

You break my heart every day and twice nightly
Hell, I'd rather be lonely
I'd rather be lonely
Than to be rejected by my one and only
I'd rather be lonely
Than feel unwanted by another claiming they love me
I'd rather be lonely
Than completely dismiss the better half my personality
I'd rather be lonely
Than watch you act like it's a chore to explore a little intimacy
I'd rather be lonely
Than to witness you go out of your way to avoid my advancements like they're icky
I'd rather be lonely
Than feel more unwanted than I did through my first 40
I'd rather be lonely
sigh
I can't imagine anybody actually choosing to be lonely
But here I am, holding out for my somebody to join me

©2024

Seas churn wildly
Dancing with the icy wind
No land mass in sight
Alone in it's savagery
My heart and soul mirrors it

©2025

How can the absolute fact that
"I'd do anything to see my son"
And the sinking reality
I've not made enough effort to see him
Exist in the same plane of existence?
A fuucking paradox
An impossible duality
But here I am
Standing in that exact reality
And the answer is me
There's no possibility,
Not even probably,
That he hasn't noticed the same
And that truth haunts me
Daily and nightly
Destroys absolutely
And completely
Why doesn't that push me?

©2024

•°• A Twisted Classic •°•

I don't want to set the world on fire
I just want to start
To burn what's left of your heart

You took my heart as my one desire
Now I hate you
For all you did and didn't do

©2024

Scared
Of
Every second
Of
Every minute
Of
Every day
Spend a lot of time in areas of gray
Moved to the margins, before getting lost in the fold
Waiting for the one bump in the road
A proverbial tale retold
The one thing
That ends every dream,
That costs everything
Leading back too a familiar nothing
Because why?
Because I
Have
Never been perfect
I've
Never been worth it
I've
Never been proven different
I'm
Not worthy of any of it
I beg constantly,
Prove me wrong
Somebody,
Anybody,
Is there nobody?
Not a single soul
Willing and able
Too prove the fable
Let me
At least see
How it'd be
Too belong
Family
Friends
Lovers
Maybe even an enemy or two,
Prove I was wrong thinking no one would come along
I've put my desperate plea in a song
With compassion in the composition
The right music hits the heart strings some
Just grasping for leverage, eyes fixed on the sun
I don't want to want to be wrong
But the list can't really be zero people long
Don't let that be the conclusion I land on
So fuuckin' lie to me...
I don't know if I can count on another day
With my own truth hanging over me
That no one claims too see
Woe is me

©2014

Foresight
No conclusions
Could be wrong, maybe right
Try seeing through the night without
Moonlight

©2025

A brain like mine, the brain of an addict, can justify anything
Drumming up excuses that defy reasoning
Connecting dots with miles of red string
Coming to conclusions that are baffling
"The problem was this here faulty Icarus wing"
"Setting me up for failure back when I was seventeen"
Not the fact of the constant nosediving
Bracing for impact, the anticipations paralyzing
It was easier to hide it in the begining
Can't hide it now, so let's call it ageing
The lack of a fatal crash is a bit puzzling
No complaining
It's just surprising
Kinda thought I'd be death defying
'Till I became stuck in the sky flying high,
Ignoring every warning
Didn't think it possible to hit the ground running
But now I'm panicking
I didn't plan for a second half, that fact is terrifying
Far scarier than any thought of dying
I wish I was lying

©2024

(Chorus)

...and she said,
"We don't have to stand it here, we can go anywhere
Find a place to call a home and build our storybook future there
If not here then where? Can't we find that anywhere?
A destination with no journey seems to me to be unfair
Some god, somewhere, already answered my prayer
Cause I'm here and you're there..."

©2023

Everyone thinks,
"It'll get easier when I get older"
Then you get older
And you find no one's there,
No one to share,
No one to say,
"Hey,
I stay because I care"
Or
"Let's get through this together"
Making it harder than ever before
Not wanting to remember
Not even a single chapter
Though at one point,
When I was younger,
I think I use to matter
I don't know why
But those are always the memories that shatter

©2024

I must let go
Or I'll lose you
But if I do that
I'll lose myself too
...I don't know what to do...

©2024

No one paid no mind
To the tears from this man
That land at my feet
Creating a quicksand
I couldn't slow the rate
At which it would expand
Leading to the scars
At the base of each hand
I know what you think of me
But this wasn't part of the grand plan
I tried and as usual
I was not able
To help you understand
That I just wasn't capable
Of being a "real man"

©2024

I mean, it's kinda funny
The punishment for life is the death penalty, that's literally the only true guarantee
Alterations void the warranty and there's no return policy, which I guess if fine honestly
But you can only rotate the tires so many times before it no longer matters
A crash will become eminent and just like the windshield, your future also shatters
No one's looking for a clock with a erratic tick and a broken tock
A polished **** advertised with a tiny sign as a shiny rock
Occasionally found screaming at nothing as frustration fills the body and muddies the mind
A full breakdown, stuck behind a roadblock, this time one of your own design
Trained by history to take every word heard with a pinch of salt
Cold and bitter, but is it by default?
Is it truly all my fault?
...why was I in such a hurry to be an adult...?
I'm gonna go make a fort and sort this all out

©2024

I'll have nothing if I lose her
If I stay I'll lose myself
So I'm forced to ask myself
What is the better future?

©2024

Trying to find shades of myself
In the simple black and white
Trying to wade out in the middle
Of a basic wrong and right
Maybe I will or maybe I won't
But maybe I just might
I want to live in the twilight
There's too much darkness in the light

©2024

Like a drug taken for a quarter century, this writing doesn't help like it use to...
See,
I'm starting to feel like it's working against me
Holding me here in pain and misery
Cleverly disguised as creativity
I use to lie and say it was a way to get rid of all this negativity
But I've spilled so much blood and tears onto stationary
...and not even purely metaphorically...
I should be completely empty
Hell, I think I might be
I think it's moved onto draining my energy
Can I still call this writing therapy?
Is it healthy or does it keep me from a new me?
Holding tightly but in spite of me
Hiding a different side of a complex personality
A new level of maturity
Is it actually helping any?
Today it's hard to say, but maybe
Unfortunately, it's something I'm good at, a skill I enjoy and I don't have many
So I've begun to notice I look at it differently
It was suppose to help me let go of the painful unpleasantry held in many a memory
But it woke a part of my ego that I didn't know would grip so tightly
It might have been a mistake to rely on it so heavily
It's no longer moving along the story
No cautionary tales to learn from because they never become history
It becomes a bookmark that I don't use properly
I never move it to the page I left off on and now, I must admit openly, I'm doing it purposely
I keep the worst of me right next to me, close as a frienemy
All because I notice I DON'T write when I'm happy
And I like to write so I dance around emotions strategically
I don't know if it's anything worth saying but writing is calling and drawing me in closely
A ghostly presence that when I look closely I see my identity
It hasn't always been but is now a big part of me
But does it want all of me?
Can't say either way with any certainty
No AH-HA moment, no clarity, only a death grip on disparity
So I recklessly walk the line of happy and tragedy
Like a DUI test on the side of the freeway, drunken pageantry
Eyes closed usually
No thought of mine or anyone else's safety
Dangerously close to calamity
And I just worry

©2024

I had it yelled at me once, "you don't even know what love is!"
At first the accusation put me on the defensive
But the examples to me of laugh, love, live
Has always been top tier corrosive, a wildly destructive narrative

©2024

I'm not scared
I'm terrified
Every step forward
Fears are verified
Every glance over the shoulder
The past gets magnified
Every breakdown in the corner
Bad strands of DNA amplified
I'm afraid if I stay on this ride
I'll be taken out with the tide
Created by the oceans I've cried
Ignored 'cause I say, "I'm good" but I lied

©2024

I'm tired of fighting for a we that you don't seem to ever be in the mood to fight for deep in your core
I'm tired of working on a we just to have me thrown in my face till I surrender and hit the floor
I'm tired of having to be perfect in order for me to be worth you sticking around for
I'm tired of being in a single topic argument just to have you bring in dozens from the way back store
I'm tired of being held fully responsible for these issues I have but am not even remotely responsible for
I'm tired of working on us issues just for you to shrug them off 'cause I have so many more
I need you to want me to be part of your we, otherwise what the fuuck are we struggling through this fire for?
I'll be waiting for your answer by the exit gate but only for a couple minutes more

©2024

Can't rid myself of it
There's surely no controlling it
Before I see it
I feel it
I fear it
And that fears legit
Didn't create it
Can't destroy it
So I'm forced to own it
While I own up to it
Like, "give me it"
"What is it?"
"A heart?"
"I'll slap it on my sleeve and wear it"
Though not to display it
But rather as a reminder of it
An extra warning of the dangers of it
And to call out all those promoting it

©2024

I've heard it said
That everyone
Has at least one someone
But imagine being
The one someone
That has no one...

©2025

I've shut down so completely it's profound and I've now lost touch with reality
What I want to be and what I'll never be eventually co-mingle and become one entity
The blasphemy, the phony sanctimony and hypocrisy blast from me
I try awkwardly to juggle all three, run 'em up the flag pole, wait and see
Hear ye, hear ye...another blunder here for your amusement, come see
Woe is me! An empty plea for pity ******* by a request to be put out of my misery
It's plane to see, at least by me, that I'm my own worst enemy, I'm no friend to me
Bad karma stacks rapidly atop the early onset of senility
Losing my mind was an inevitability but that was my only company
...now it's only me...
The notion that behind every smile you'll find your happy is, in it's self, a fallacy

©2023

(song)

I'm only human
I am not perfect...
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it...
Yeah, I'm only human
I'm only human

Sometimes I don't wanna carry on with this life another day, but that ain't the thing to say, at least not out loud anyway
My carry on is baggage and part of me but can't stay? I need it to remind myself what had hurt me along the way
It's completely intertwined with my destiny, seemingly by design, forged by my raw history gone astray
So not by the fire burning within per say but rather by a flame that got carried away, lighting up my dismay
Not a phoenix, no rising from the ashes, I just claimed them as my own then created a home
A collection of stone after stone thrown in my direction become the cornerstone of the foundation I raised all alone
Harvest my own backbone to support the load, structural integrity is homegrown
Get blown down, just rebuild, try to hone my skill to out will what I've sown

I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
I don't know what you expect of me
Yeah, I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
Understand all I can be is just me

**** and moan, scream and cry to an empty auditorium, my lithium battery drained and I don't know where to go get some from
All thumbs and numb, fumbled the mission, what's done is done, can't be undone, self reflection is no fun so I play dumb
When reality hit it stung, my demon won, a surprise to no one, all attempts to enter the ring ended with me caught up in the top wrung
Can't predict the future but I see the inevitable outcome, only one lonely track on this self titled album
Said track is a sad song, repeat stuck in the on position and so loud I didn't get off stage at the sound of the gong
Not only did I play the biggest part of my downfall but tragedy overshadowed comedy in this parity type sitcom
I can pin point precisely when and where it all went wrong but can't explain why I kept on this particular path for so long
Prayed for help then buried my head in the sand before it came along, popped up only to find it already gone

I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
I don't know what you expect of me
Yeah, I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
What you see is the only me I can be
I'm only human, yeah, I'm only human
I'm only human, yeah, I don't feel human
...what am I doin'?

I slip and trip more often than not, trapped in the web of a side plot, main story got lost in the shuffle, it happens a lot
Forgot to implement basic self maintenance leading to rot spreading to every thought
So I question the thought that I ought not lower my defenses, got caught in the in between, can't connect, lost a dot
Struggled with the day to day, fought just to get to a level playing field, all for naught
Yes, it was me, I did it, I hit the self destruction button too quick but it didn't say elimination, it was simply labeled quit
No mention of a death certificate or that it would make the feelings of my inadequate existence permanent
I couldn't keep my whits about me, lost sight of what was important, my insecurities the culprit
Don't think for one moment though that attention is why I did it, it most certainly isn't

I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
I don't know what you expect of me
Yeah, I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
What it is you see in me

Responsibly taken, still forsaken, got front row seats to my damnation but it's a rerun that I'm tired of watchin'
Internalized everything behind blue eyes, an examination taken place with no follow up explanation given, why are the results always hidden but lurkin' right outside my field of vision
The implosion of my life left a broken man child chokin' on the pieces left and your sinister laugh proves you think I'm jokin' or just enjoyin' what you're seein'
The implication bein' that there's no salvation, no savin', tried on the shoe and continue to wear it, it fits to perfection
Pretend not to listen so you can't be guilted into any type of action at all, and so you're not looked at as responsible
And that's reasonable, you let out a little nervous laugh and giggle cause it makes you feel uncomfortable
And that's just a small taste compared to my mouth full, out of mind, out of sight not possible
The blowback was powerful, not mindful of everything I don't know, what I do know now is I was never in full control

I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
I don't know what you expect of me
Yeah, I'm only human
I am not perfect
I don't know what you want from me
No, I may not be stupid
I may just not get it
This isn't the me I want to be
I'm only human, yeah, I'm only human
I'm only human, yeah, I don't feel human
...define being human?

©2022

An organic cell
An inescapable cage
A personal hell
A shell of rampant rage

Under a digital spell
Center stage
A deadly swell
Safety not easy to gauge

How quickly the bar fell
A sageless age
Shhhh, don't tell
It's the same on every page

©2024

A life with no safety net
Do I make it or will this be yet another instance where I don't hit the ground running, instead I splat flat on the pavement
Place your bet, I'll take that bet
Another tally mark added to my list of regret
I'm my own biggest threat and relentless as it can get
I feel preset to replay every horrible event
A looped cassette
Bad precedent after bad precedent set
Where is this button labeled reset?
When will I find the bottom of this decent?
If you tell me I'll try to keep the secret
I forget now if I've ever even seen it
I know I never see it coming, but there's no question I've felt it
Going dark and cold like a long forgotten briquette
Stagnant and never lit
Like a burning cigarette this hell is a slow burn with evil intent
I'm spent like a tax return, sanity gone before I even got to know it
Out of my mind cause I could no longer afford the rent
My twisted twist on Russian roulette is the full chamber aspect
So you can surely predict past it
My downfalls bound to hit a record high percent
The first click shoulda/woulda/coulda ended it all in an instant
With steel to flesh, I find myself desperate to create an outlet
To finally get the torment to ease up a bit
But it jams every time and I must admit
Dumb luck and the law of odds get the credit

©2024

Never did I intend
To depend
So heavily on this pen
And the hand it was able to lend
But if I didn't spend
The time I did attend
Like if I only spent the weekend
Workin' on me,
I wouldn't have been able to defend my heart
Or fend off the dark
Because I wouldn't have been able to comprehend
The in-between
Of the beginning and the end

©2024

Would you get a load of this priick...

Entitlement punk crybaby excrement
In mom's basement
Everyday
Trying to **** his own wick

No ******* with a chick
Mildly pathetic
Still
Stream it to the public

Embarrassment is gonna hit
Shoulda quit
To late
Now this is what you get

Find blame and aim it
Control the topic
"It ain't me"
...so it must be women's empowerment?

Assuming you never knew what rhetorical meant
You can't know that wasn't
I'm asking,
That's not a statement

The angers placement
Seems specifically targeted doesn't it
Common denominator
Looks to be your equipment...
...dip shiit

Y'all need Jesus, you're sick

©2024

Can't break
This figure eight
So as of late
I've been leaving it up to fate
To reveal a gate
Before my plate
Folds under the weight
Transforming me into living bait
For thoughts of hate
Directed straight
At a lone inmate
Inside this prison-esque estate
Skull bone real estate
I was forced to create
Became a red flag trait
And looking back it's probably innate

©2024

I've heard people are strange
When you're a stranger
A lesson learned
Only as you grow older

Faces look ugly
When you're alone
My past proves
No one pays no mind to what's shown

They say women seem wicked
When you're unwanted
My truth is I've wasted
All the time allotted

Streets are uneven
When you are down
Seemingly impossible
To find solid ground

The strange
Have faces they hide in the rain
It's strange
Couldn't be bothered to remember my name

Are you strange?
Am I strange?
What is straaaaaange?

©2024

There was no intention in me
To walk away from you
It was more or less something
You inspired me to do

©2024

With the passing of the years
The good disappears
Take inventory,
What's left for me?
Only nightmares and fears
Lies for the heart, mind and ears
Wasted light-years
A husk of a man appears
Drained from fighting through iron bars and chains with nothing but tears
The blind leading the blind
While the blind steers
Grinding through all the gears
With the numbing effect of false help from **** and beers
A deluge of judgment from peers
The worst kind of souvenirs
And yet still my heart peers
Looking for new frontiers
Maybe after the glue adheres
From past repairs
But I'm racing an end that nears

©2024

Always trying to stop the next fight
Never in sight, a hopeless plight
I will forever try will power over might
Just to keep the darkness in the light
A familiar stint so I attempt to end it
A thought historically dependent
On a shrinking love remnant
Gone while I pretend it
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
I scream
You scream
No ice cream
Just fighting
A violent theme
A borderline crime scene
Upstream
From the dream

I settle down
But have found
My last breath comes
Right before I drown
Feeling bound
To shifting ground
My pleas make
Not a single sound
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
Who are you and who am I?
How'd we find answers in a lie?
Truth or dare or live or die
Six feet under there's no blue sky
I ask why to no avail
Your bull shiit's what flips the veil
How is it that you still prevail?
With the decision to up and bail
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
Go
Just fuucking go
How many red flags are you going to show?
I'd rather not know
Why push friend to foe?
I get it, love didn't conquer all
Love birds in flight can indeed fall
Never though did I expect a wall
Or for you to skip the voodoo doll
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

©2025

I see you look at me
But do you see me?
Am I see through?
Could it be that easy?

When you do look,
What are you looking for?
Only what you want to see?
What if I'm something more?
((What if I'm nothing more?))

Will you lie to yourself
If you see something different?
If I'm not perfect but maybe adjacent
Will that still justify a replacement?

I don't know what this is
I don't know why I form questions
To queries I want no answers too
Just to repeat the painful lessons

©2025

Hello hello,
Welcome to the show
Good luck getting through the impossible to get through MO
One long typo
A hypocritical, defeatist manifesto
More stupid than ******
Misplaced gusto,
SUP BRO?!
Possible becomes unreachable then unthinkable
Undeniable failure is sure to follow
First name familiar with the mental hospital
A revolving door install
Biggest chart right up toward the front of the file being that it's alphabetical
A tragic life, only ironically comical
Spine stained yellow
Same as the teeth, thanks Marlboro
A nose incased in a thick brown crust on the face, smack dab in the middle
Cornered with a dunce cap and a little bit of spittle
Condition has always been critical
I do take it personal
Can't show, can't let them know it hurts even a little
A forgettable imbecile with a needless purpose and a fleeting soul
Held accountable but it's not balanced or rational
Equal? I guess maybe, but not equal to anything favorable
Decent into madness unavoidable
Some of you are only here for the spectacle
Swerling around the bottom of the toilet bowl
Forced sabbatical
Out of sight, out of mind so I've band all travel
Departure and arrival
Business and commercial
An attempt at better has been abysmal
Wouldn't have made it past the pilot if it were a show
You would just know it was shiit though from the overflow
"You've made your choice" but not by choice, it's never that simple

©2024

I took a quarter of a lifetime to create
Boundaries with an impenetrable gate
That I could fall back to at a later date
Who knew I wouldn't have to wait
Because as soon as I challenged fate
And tried to break this family trait
And shift from the pattern of self hate
To a more beneficial internal way to associate
I was lead to and left in this mental state
No trial, no debate
Forced with the threat of death to participate
And that safe place, it began to deteriorate
As the darkness started to manipulate
Causing my stronghold to mutate
At an astonishing rate
'Till now I just feel like an inmate

©2024

It's an external fuse that's lit
And ignites the internal hate and abuse
I put up a respectable fight
But at the end of the night
I always wonder, "what's the use?"
Now I have to come up with an excuse
For being me,
For being what you see
But I've run out of preprogrammed lines
Who I really am is already set in everyone's minds
I stand in fresh sand
The oceans tides has taken with it all of the lines
Rendering me lost
Is what I've paid anywhere near the actual cost?
When is it okay to say
Maybe this life is a loss...

©2025

Who of you can hear laughter in both ears, a devilish whisper from each shoulder
I dare say this two vs one nightmare is a little unfair, turn to tag out and there's no one there
My corner's bare, how'd I even get here? On my knees, can't breathe, please, someone return the air
Dark comes from everywhere leaving one light in the far distance, dead center and it draws near
Looked death square in the face and said, "you're no longer welcome here"
He didn't hear, probably did just didn't care to answer
No atheists in foxholes huh, who knows the correct prayer?
Do we even have a prayer?
Why bother with a prayer
It's only wasted air, there's no one there
...is there??

©2023

Does it look like I care?
No sir
Easy answer
But you can't see in here
Unaware or pretender?
Oblivious or clueless?
Neither
I don't make myself clear
To the goings on between each ear
What takes over top tier?
It's all fear
I checked there earlier
There's plenty of that here
A hypocrite because took second chair to fear
I let it steer,
Did nothing as it ground through every gear
While telling others of the inherent danger
Watching it veere right before approaching what I'm after
I can only look in the rear view or side mirror
One shows issues catching up,
The others closer than they appear
A hard knock heir
There's not a lot to envy in here
I don't have it in me to care
If I could I probably would, I swear

©2024

I watch life's ultimate plan to bulldoze
Play out and target any happy settlement,
'Till all that's left are foreclosed burrows
Unwelcoming ghettoes
A real to life Gotham City narrows
Everyone knows
Shiit flows
Down stream and my life's the delta where it all goes
And it shows
As it never slows
Better days?
I'm out of those...
I don't suppose
You have one you could spare
All I have to offer
Is heartache and woes

©2024

"I don't like this, I don't want to be here"
Well, add a "T" here or move on
The PURSUIT of happiness is the right they mention
Remember though, it's an emotion
And just like every other one
It too isn't healthy to always be on
A better life is the big con
Middle class gone
Devide and conquer worked to perfection
Mostly 'cause half the population
Can't do long division
Can't trust a single politician
Corruption now the backbone of religion
Founding fathers knew the importance of separation
But those who've cherry pick the bible from generation to generation
Now want the option too cherry pick the Constitution
It no longer matters what's right and wrong
Just belt out your fight song
If you don't like something go get your march on
Or hit the gong
Pretend your conviction is strong
And when your judgement comes along
There's nothing you can do but end up where you belong

©2024

Given a hand to go hand in hand in the park
Only allowed to be enjoyed in the dark
And as I curse the idea of an always present silver lining
I notice it to be easier to witness the splendor of our spark

©2025

Lost in my own mind
Trying desperately to find
A point to witch I can rewind
Or,
At the very least define,
A familiar moment that'll remind
That it's not always been a difficult timeline
And if I can do that I should be fine

©2024

It's my fault
It's my fault for thinking someone willing to lie from day one could be the one
It's my fault
It's my fault for thinking that my love would be worth someone's full attention
It's my fault
It's my fault for brushing off caution like, "it's not a red flag, iiiiit's more of a crimson"
It's my fault
It's my fault for being a coward when this time, maybe for the first time, there is no reason
It's my fault
It's my fault...fuuck it...whatever...it's always my fault, I'm done..find another sucker to pick on

©2024

Digging my own grave with only the handle of a shovel
That's the level of commitment that I bring
But I should tell you this one thing
That also means I have lost the battle
Probably because I could never gain control
Up such and such creek with no paddle
No shanty to sing
Mistakenly trusted an Icarus wing
But that was years ago
Here I am, still stuck in the flow
For what seems like a couple hundred millennia or so
Combating my own soul
Laughing and mocking
The relentlessness is life altering
Landing a career ending swing
Not declaring but taking it personal
And I think I just realized I'll have nothing to show
No,
That's impossible
Win or lose I present as a broken man not worth repairing
And hey,
That's still something

©2024

Believe me you
I'm tired of hearing me too
I'm ready for this era to be through
It's sad to see in both you and me that the same resentment aimed in the same direction grew

©2024

Don't do this
Don't be that
Basically
Don't exist
Unless
You can do this
And you can be that

©2014

It's simple...
There's no heaven, there's no hell,
Only good and evil
Atrocities carried out by people
One of the biggest cover-ups is under the steeple

...and even still,
Just to shiit and giggle a little,
Let's say da bible is factual
Then heaven is empty & hell is full

No one can live up to that mantle
Not a single soul
And if you do, by some miracle
Don't forget about his branding of a sin original

I'm not getting tossed in hell
To burn eternal
Because I couldn't unravel
Some self fulfilling riddle designed to be impossible

And as a whole
"Where the Fuuck've you been?" That's all we'd like to know
I'll go one step further, I want him held accountable
As the trinity or individual

I can't wait to ask questions that make a "GOD" uncomfortable
To watch him back track and stutter a little miiiiiiiiiiight be worth it all...
...okay, here we go...

©2024