There only ever seems to be misunderstandings
This week felt like honey and nostalgia
Mint and perfume,
clementines and violet lilacs
sublime, sublime, sublime
It reminds me of
Connection; the importance of engagement
The need for eye-contact and fits
of laughter
And just as quick as fortune visits
my sides brittle with doubt
for something I've forgotten
And our eyes glaze but
I take the steps back and
Huddle in relapse,
your thoughts perplexed- looking at the conversations we'd shared
just fourteen hours ago.

I'm tired.
I don't want the false claims
Only for you to forget and go on
Because ******* you promised me
And I need you now
As I lie in bed
Crying to sleep,
How you told me you wouldn't
Be the cause to my pain
But here we are
And all I need,
Even as I lie here in the everlasting bottomless pit of melancholy
Is your arms.
Even though I want to hurt you so bad
Make you feel my pain...
I just want you to hold me.
Tell me it'll be alright.
That you've changed.

Guess something never change, huh?

How constant you are,
From the surface of my skin,
To deep within,
Bothering me with your tiny stings,
It does not take long,
To feel and then heal
All in the same day,
Changing all the time
Like every single line,
New words in different orders,
Shifting emotional and physical boarders,
Popping through skin,
Killing my heart from within.

Dear Pain,
Please leave me alone. This was never fun in the first place.
Love,
Pretty Much Everyone

Earlier
Before the sun was set
I had five minutes alone
With the universe
I remember thinking
That they could not take the air
Or the sky
They won't take anything that really matters
Except for time
But
If this is the end
All was not wasted
Just fragments
In between spaces
Those moments
Where pain is best forgotten
Anger laid to rest
No longer that sharpness
In my chest
I could easily
Rest
One day
If I'm lucky

Take it from me
There’s not much to see
In this garden with few sunny days

No prize winning flowers
Sprouting upward like towers
For invited guests to amaze

But when I come home
To a house all alone
I’m glad that my yard goes

To humble blossoms
Daffodils lined in rows
And a spot where tulips have arose

It's where I go to unwind
Achieve peace of mind
And escape a day of lows

So I’m sure you’ll agree
There’s not much to see
In this garden for guests to amaze

But this garden is fine
Because it is mine
Where I happily spend all my days

It's closing in,
The chance has fade
Regret was felt,
Mistakes were made
Action by action,
Day by day...
It's all the same.
Repeated in a loop, with the spell of daily needs.
An opportunity rises,  with all to gain
Cherished the given,
And hoped nonetheless
Still held back, what could've been the best.
Words unspoken and heart in dismay.
Throbbing, it was beat for beat
Thought before spoken... of all to be said.
For all in his way, was the image of himself.
To fear rejection, is what he had felt.
Panicked and let it slide...
For an opportunity missed.
And she fades into the shadows...as my thoughts in dismount,
Regret had been made, feelings confined.
To look forward for the future,
And hope for another time.

I know what I want.
I want someone to steal my clothes,
To curl up in one of my rumpled dress shirts.
I want to step out of the shower,
And find my love waiting for me,
Bleary eyed and beautiful,
In one of my t-shirts.
I want someone I can debate philosophy,
Emotion, physics, ethics, morals with.
I want to be able to trust someone,
So I don't worry about,
Walking in on a lack of faithfulness.
I want to be loved.
I want to be believed in,
To be wanted and cherished.
Yet I know,
What I want...
I can't have.