sometimes a song hurts so good that i can't conjure the energy to turn it off
when a song reminds me of how happy we used to be or how sad i am now
i can't turn it off or turn it down
because sometimes the pain, is the only thing that keeps me sane

I make up time limits in my head...
“If he doesn't call me before 7pm, he doesn't want me.”
“If it takes him a day to respond, he really has found someone new.”
“If I have one more sleepless night because of him, I don't talk to him for a week.”

The limits never turn out
I still have hope
Even though I'm desperately in love with you
and to you I'm just the kid sister of a friend you used to know

Everytime I say goodnight, I'm saying I love you.

Everytime I say Hi, I'm saying I miss you.

Everytime I don't return a text, I'm saying all I want to do is respond but I don't want to look too desperate.

Everytime I encourage you to go after another girl, I'm saying I want you to tell me you don't need to, because you've already found one.

Everytime I say nothing's wrong, I'm saying that living this lie is killing me, but it's worth it whenever I see you smile.

Everytime I say goodnight, I'm saying I love you.

I have too much pride during the day
So I don't call you

And when the day turns to night
I curse out my strength  

Because maybe you have too much pride too
And maybe you miss me as much as I miss you

I know that past me is jealous of current me
Because I have you and I'm so happy
Past me craved you
She craved you so much that she carved herself
Past me lost you and lost you over and over
Until past me lost herself
Past me was weak after being caught up in your gravity
She couldn't get out of bed most days
Past me listened to mother tell her she was going crazy
Until she finally did go insane
Past me was so sad
Not in a beautiful, tragic way
She was just sad

But now I'm starting to realize that I'm getting caught up in your gravity and craving for you is driving me crazy and past me may slowly be turning into future me

There are three hours in every day that I hate
Three hours that I absolutely dread

It's the time between talking with you and dreaming about you

There are three hours that I hate
Three hours that I absolutely dread

It's the time between talking with you and dreaming about you

We live hours apart so you say goodnight before I do

and the time between "us" and "us in dreamland" is unbearable

It's the time when the waves of loneliness and doubt come crashing down
and you aren't there to call and no one else is around

I know this is one of the things I will never say to you
but those three hours **** me every single day

I get messages from you everyday
We talk for hours about everything and nothing
I ask you questions
I tell you about my day
We talk about everything except for why you went away

I fall back in love with you with every conversation, every phone call, every text message
I watch your life through pictures and stories that don't include me