Is it so bad to be the way I am?
I can barely convince myself
To get out of bed
If I'm not sleeping all day

To be reminded to eat
Or reminded what happened yesterday

I get so dizzy, I fall down
Get so tired that my whole body
Shuts down

And there are even days
When I hate myself
So strongly, that I want nothing more than to punish myself for living
I don't even want to die out of pity
But I feel like I am so toxic
That I deserve to die
I deserve all the pain the world has to offer

When anything bad happens in my life
Anymore, I don't hardly get upset
I merely accept it, and say that's what I get
For being who I am

I don't even want to live
I'm so high on medication
And yet I can't image lasting
One moment in my natural mind

I want to die
I want to die
I think about it all the time
Look into my eyes
And tell me it'll be alright
It'll only be another lie

Poetry is my word *****

It stirs in the pit of my stomach

So I puke up the letters

Just to try and feel better

But it turns out, I'll always be sick