Oh, like many on this earth.
I avoided all kinds of ways to knowing him.
And all his glory.
He were the least of my worries.

But one day, one day, one day.
I just turned my focus upon him.
It's been a long, long journey to you, Lord.

Yes, a long, long journey to you.

At one time all my joy existed in the world of trouble.
Not concern with how it affected my mother.
Least of all me.

But it been a long, long journey to you, Lord.
Yes, a long, long journey to you.

But you waited.
I guess you anticipated the day I returned to you.

The grindstone.

It's the wait on
the station
killing time as
Indeed
time's killing me,
slowly
I am inexorably drawn
like a moth to a flame
by the stations
that make me
wait over and over
again.

Obsessive compulsive
and that might be so,
I still go though.

Catch me on time lapse
as I collapse.

Life is the camera,
the action, a panacea
for the sick.

I never run for the train
it never comes anyway
I wait
and I wait and
this is my life in
a nutshell
cooked up every day.

colours too
wading through this
cross spectrum
at a loss leading section
in
a pound shop near to you,
but
it all sounds phony,
if only I knew.

And I'm back to the question,
what am I doing?

waiting,
that's what I do
every corner I turn
something new and
if not new
then
hardly used.


That's a short skirt
I blurt out
then get out
at the next stop,
a nonevent
never realised
I had spoken aloud.

and I'm here again
waiting
at the station
with a face on,

It's going to be a ******
long day.

2 am, no sleep
Feels like every poem begins like that these days
Dense in my stomach
When did I last eat?
As long as I don't wither, I'll be fine
Why am I always tired?
Once I take those iron pills, I'm good
That song came on twice today
Heard your name as always
It hurts a little less each time
Punches my gut, knots it in two
I closed my eyes when I passed your school today
Because I never got to say goodbye
We stayed contained for too long
I never knew you the way I wanted to
I could play our love back
I'd only be sad once again
I gave you too much to handle
Life, it seems, was too fast
For my baby to keep up with
So now I sit at 2 am
Without your voice ringing in my ears
Alone, but not as broken
As you might think
Just full of thoughts
Stuck on *what if?

Justify it.
Try too.
But still it be apart of selected news.
Just saying.

When white officers **** black males.
Just notice the rate of lowness concerning the opposite.
Just saying.

Black officers shooting to death of white males stays low.
Is it because of common sense approach.
Or power of the weapon in a white officer hands.
Just saying.

A jury of fools avoid solving conflicts.
By buying into this serve and protect philosophy.
When sometimes evidence states guilt.

in the dark, december nights
i tend to get cold sometimes
but i happen to bare it
because there isn't always
the satisfaction of the winter wind