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510 · Nov 2014
A stranger next door
aviisevil Nov 2014
I see you through the stained walls of my home,
Your window is open
And my heart is beating way too fast.
I can sit back and enjoy now that I'm all alone
My heart would be broken
But I don't care no more for it won't last.
John just left a few minutes ago-
And I gave him what I had.
I never told you how beautiful you are,
But you are amazing, my love,
Those are some nice **** you have.
Now I'm ready for the show,
Oh, and-
I love the tattoo on your back.
Such a fine lady,
It must be so hard when he leaves you alone,
Sometimes I think about it,
And the other day I broke into your home.
I didn't take anything,
God, I'm not a pervert
But I remember that feeling-
It changed everything,
I saw how beautiful your life is-
And I admit, It hurts.
I watch you as you stare in the mirror,
Displeased the way it makes you feel
I remember that scar he gave you,
Guess, some scars do never heal.
Sometimes I dream about you and me,
Try to plot some ways I can steal your heart,
You have no clue how shallow you've made me,
Without you I might break apart.
I stalked you once,
followed you to the park where you take your kids,
I hope you realise,
All of the neighbourhood comes out to have a look at your ****.
I even fought one of those creeps,
Remember how he abused you your way home ?
I found him late one night in the street,
And bashed his skull open when he was alone.
I even gave my candy to your little angel,
She has your eyes
I wish we could be more than just strangers,
I need you Mary, I won't lie.
I can't sleep without you,
And the pills only make me feel more miserable
John told me I need a doctor,
I'm getting more unstable.
But he has never fallen in love,
Has never felt the way I feel for you
I know you won't understand
But I know deep inside you love me too.


I watch him as he slits your throat,
I admit, I've never seen something more beautiful than this.

Wish I could be the one caressing your throat,
Licking all that blood as it trickles down your ****.

Only if you would've chosen me instead of him,
God knows you could have been so happy and alive.

Now John is my friend and I care for him,
But... " HEY, JOHN! KEEP YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF FROM THE **** OF MY WIFE ".
Notes (optional)
509 · Apr 2014
Inhuman
aviisevil Apr 2014
I'm done being human,
I don't like the places it leads
All those hidden emotions
That I just can't seem to reach
The saints hung on the cross
And all he ever does is preach
The air is full of holy words
In this smoke I can't even breathe



Take my hand now,
And lead me to my grave
I don't need your love
For i've seen you hate



Why am I talking to you,
You've never seen my nightmare
All my sins I hurl upon you
And silence is all you can hear
In the crowd I feel more alone,
Even though you're everywhere
tomorrow i'll be gone,
But you'll always be right here



Every breath that escapes me,
Is a smile in your eyes
You want to show me the truth
When all you have are lies




What of these sweet dreams,
And the lullabies that haunt
Why are you still here
What is that you want
I've given you everything
Yet, You still seek more
Why did I ever embrace you,
What was it all worth for



Will you hunt me down,
Now that I don't belong
And take away my crown
If I don't come along



Every blade that kiss my skin,
Will be in your name
As the scar travels within
It will remind you of pain
You watch me fall apart,
Don't even bother to pull out your knife
You squeeze my bleeding heart
And ask me, what i've done with my life



As I embrace the other side,
You whisper in my disgrace
You broke every mirror
Now you want to scar my face




I'm not what I was,
Something inside changed
I was born human
But i'll never be one of you again
If that's what it takes,
i'll scar myself with a smile
You're not awake,
Hav'nt seen the devil in a while




You will fear once again,
Of the ghost you so made
When i'm done with you
Every colour will fade




As I rip open your Soul,
Stare deep in your eyes
Remember you're the evil
I was made from your lies
As I make my way to your heart,
My claws will hurt no more
Can you not see in the dark,
Where you enslaved me for ever-more





I won't even hear you scream,
For i'll be lost in your demise
As the blade brings down the wrath
You'll see the human in my eyes








And i'll see the human in yours
Notes (optional)
506 · Jun 2015
a story of love
aviisevil Jun 2015
I will love you till the end he whispered
and that's when she looked in his eyes
as she touched him he withered
after all his words were her lies

I have no where else to be
she heard him every night
in the cold hearts and warm bodies
only the claws dug deeper and tight

don't let go of me you ******
he heard her moan so softly
as the moans got louder
the silence screamed loudly

she had never been so lonely
as he turned his head away
the look in his eyes
voicing more than words can convey

in her fading dreams he lingers
like he did when they were young
now the distance seems long enough
in how far they have come

only the stares she says
they are enough to make her his again
she knows when he wakes
she can hear him call her name

and he can still make her smile
like he did when they were young
and if nothing else they know
they shared what they've become

i love you more than life he smiled
as she woke in his arms one day
she had never been more beautiful
he knew he loved her more everyday

i love you she whispered silently
for she knew he had no heart
he caressed her ever so softly
there would be a morning in few hours

i love you more than life he said
before he disappeared back into the dark
with all her wishes gone and paid
now she keeps a broken heart
Notes (optional)
aviisevil Feb 2017
with my hands on my heart and knife on the clown
I'm just pretending I'm laughing..while it all crashes down..
just breathing for a moment.. and watching everyone around
they look so happy.. have they all been swimming in the magic potion..
brewed by the old ghost i found lingering in the shadows..
I wonder if they can see how the flood has swept everything away on the ground..
the noahs arc is broken.. begging for mechanic to repair the scars..
every hour a new boy is born to rip off the struggling heart..
no daughter to confuse your soul with.. the father makes me sick..
and mother's out there in the ocean.. ready to drown..

is that what they preached when we were kids ?
I never came to know.. i was down for a while with random ****..
and they told me my words don't mean anything unless I learn with fire..

where there is hate there is desire to destroy whatever you make of it..
stranger times have weathered the storms.. those gave me the chills

and I'm forgetting if I was supposed to be polite to the outside world..
the same folks who never cared if the little boy was hurt..

now Give me your solution and dissolve me of your worries..
I want that bollywood hit... where I'll be lost with a beautiful chick lost in poppy seeds.
I've bled what you bleed and I was never disgusted to how it all panned out...

no matter how much the school principle spent the time in screaming..
I never heard  anyone shout...
MAYBE I never cared for the migraine bouts..
far too less concerned with life and all that it takes away..
always ready to run away
from their dreams and what they kept out to be lost..

I was never the good child.. always pathetic and vile...
ready to **** in a moment of heat.. now I've stabbed myself enough to leave..

Let me go.. let me rule my world..
let me love like no other..
I don't need your fake sisters and brothers..
I DON'T pray to your god.. I'm just happy alone in the woods...
With a pair of socks and twenty dogs..
waiting for me to whistle I never came to realise..
I'm ready for your demise..
I'm ready for mine..

pray that I don't ever cross your path.. they say I have a burning mind..

too engrossed in moment of bliss.. that i don't have the time to be who's right..
But that's alright..
that's enough for a fight..
and in the night I'll pretend I've fallen asleep...
dreaming about things they never let me keep..
for an age.. I was getting on the stage.. for the reapers who wouldn't really reap..

that's a thousand feet from where I've stood all my life..
holding the knife on my throat that cuts deep..

isn't it beautiful to be different when you don't know how to be anything else ?

maybe a tree that isn't free ?

What they cannot be And what I cannot see ?

do I have to be what they tell me how it's all supposed to be ?

never beautiful but always afraid..


why not be how i was made ?

even though a mistake..

isn't it beautiful to be ugly..
Principle is the principal.
504 · Aug 2016
Normal confusion
aviisevil Aug 2016
out of thin air, ghosts appear
somewhere in the moment
as I turn back, time disappears
and all that remain is gone
the torment cuts me open
and everything broken spills out
no matter how much I shout
it's all the same, it's all the same
nobody else is interested in change
to change, re-arrange the physics
this darkness holds something mystic
artistic, that keeps numbing my soul
not counting the countless sanity it stole
I've never been able to escape from it
there are only walls and no doors anymore
and I've been stuck inside of it
for as long as I can remember
last december I almost killed myself
but that's alright, just a story of one night
if I just hold on tight, I can learn to spell
just the thought of it makes me sick
i wasn't even down the road and I still got hit
guess, I missed the signs after all
too busy counting my tears those didn't fall
now I'm left all alone, and I'm haunted
only silence and nothing else, exactly like what I once wanted
oh, I'm so rotten, it's insane and I have no clue where I belong
everything else appears so colourful and enchanted
am I the only one dying in this song
why am i crying again when I have nothing left to lose
i made all those memories and they made me a noose
I'm in no mood to end my pain
it doesn't matter, they won't even remember my name
I'm used to being at the same place and never move
hiding the flaws all across the empty space
there's no face I remember, not even my own
and 'tis my grave, here I will sleep, until the ghosts are gone
to haunt another memory
504 · Dec 2024
untying
aviisevil Dec 2024

Can you untie
the knots—
when nothing’s broken?

Everything lingers,
still,
held in deep slumber.

And then it arrives:
the rains of July,
shattering silence,
demanding reckoning.

Has it come to this?
Seas unraveling,
moons collapsing,
the sun rising
to an empty bed.

Has it drifted so far?
Rivers swallowed by dust,
mountains falling to ash,
no one left
to witness
the purple skies.

A solitary world,
silent,
its shadows long,
waiting
to be forgotten.



504 · Dec 2016
The good children
aviisevil Dec 2016
was it so long ago ?
when i used to
dream till noon
dream about the stars
scream to the moon

i regret every scar
and hour
for bringing me
so away so soon

from that beautiful corner
to a dutiful mourner

is every seed
meant to bloom ?
501 · Jun 2016
debris
aviisevil Jun 2016
Flying through the debris
I'm free
Here I am
I'm free at last
For the worth it will last
Forever and always
In my heart
Forgotten and buried
never to be again
In that nothingness
I WILL FIND YOU
And we will be
As we were
Always
Always meant to be
You and I
So high
In the sky
Amongst the stars
Feel my scars
Drink my pain
Feed my heart
I've been lonely
Yours only
For so far
Who we are
What we became
With every hour
And like shards
Sharks
and all the things between
It's all just an ocean
Always has been
So loved
So broken
So vile
Like you and I
So alive  
It's all a lie
Do not dream
Do not scream
Do not close your eyes
Fight
Fight the urge
Purge
On your instincts
Let yourself be
For this while
Do not hide
Do not fight
It'll be alright
Like I tell myself
Every night
Everything still feels the same
Even though
So many tears have passed
In so many years
Those couldn't last
I never asked
While I was breathing
Was it ever meant to last
For the worth it will last
It'll be mine to keep
Mine to breed
And feed
To be freed
This greed
Will bleed
And tear my heart in to pieces
Two pieces
Because that's all I have
One half of my own
More alone
Than you  could ever be
And you still can't see
You can't recall my face
Remember that place
That time
When you were blind
And I saw you
Through the debris
aviisevil Sep 2022
A song for you: 5/9/22










if only i could cry with somebody
how beautiful must the day be

when you're lost lookin' for somebody
oh their face is all that you see

they will tell you all love's the same
when you die nothing remains

it takes a life to forget a name
say your goodbyes when it rains

                       ------

for the night if i could be anybody
I'd be the one right next to you

doesn't matter if you want somebody
it only matters if they're not with you

they will tell you how much it pains
even though it's so hard to explain

done it before and you'll do it again
it takes nothing to fall in love again










@writeweird
494 · Jan 2014
Children of the moon
aviisevil Jan 2014
Hidden and depraved
They lurk in the dark alleys
Of a forgotten world
In a nightmares valley
In the devils belly
A place to call home
Invisible ghosts
Now and forever alone

Living on morsels
That life throws at them
In those grey cold walls
With a melody they blend
Every brick whispers
A scar in their tale
Hung on their chests
With a crooked nail

Breathing the smoke
Pure with grief
Seeps deep down
Where no one can reach
Learning lessons
That no sorrow can teach
Tears have dried
With blood they weep

Living in oblivion
With tracks outgrown
Road is lost
In miles they've known
Eyes don't seek the sky
For its too far
Searches dreams
In own heart

Aroma of the burning rubber
Fills the morning blues
Every marrow
There's a fear induced
Of what lies ahead
In this winter gloom
Searching for day
Children of the moon
494 · Jun 2017
sell the river
aviisevil Jun 2017
i cut myself today
into tiny
pieces of hurt

there's so much to say
but i've sold all my words

sold all my love
and i know what i've done

living inside my flesh
i don't know what i've become

i don't know myself

and i don't want to be inside
someone else

without shiny things
without any wealth

scars smile wide
as i write on myself

colour myself in a different creed

i do not bleed
there's no ink
to breathe

and i cannot leave
this prison made of me

what i cannot be
these walls
touch and see

the window is broken
the door wide open

but i cannot flee
out there
it's all an empty sea

and i'm already so lost
so ready to pay the cost

and leave before
they catch me dreaming

like a fish
who forgot it's alive
and still breathing

i have to stop
or i'll fade before
i can stop reading

between the lines
eating on my mind

walking on acid and wine
staring into the mirror

it's so cold and sharp
and it whispers

to me
about everything that withers
back to winter

and i'm so old with no heart
it's so easy to forget
how the dark still lingers

but the blood's still red
as it flows down a river

and i'm drowning,


laying underneath my bed
with monsters in my head

nobody has ever found me


and i'm still crawling
angry and howling

i don't know why

searching for a way
back to my myself

as the moment dies.
we're all bought and sold.
494 · Sep 2014
My lonely head
aviisevil Sep 2014
Her red eyes whispered,
And the tears began to fall
Her face slowly dispersed,
And she leaned against the wall.
The dark slowly cleared,
There I saw her crawl
In the midst of her fear,
Now I could see her all.
She lingered on the wooden floor,
As the shrieks filled the air
She wasn't herself anymore,
The old face but disappeared.
Instead eyes darker than the dark,
Pounced at me from the clear
At her chest was a burning scar,
With all the fire her heart bears.
Her fingers clenched in a fist,
Broken glass lying everywhere
Her eye's doused in mist,
She was in her nightmare.
Pitying for her sorry state,
Waiting for her to calm
I wondered if it was too late,
But I wanted her in my arms
Her beautiful face still haunted,
And I longed for an embrace
I guess I was still by her side,
But I knew soon I would fade.
I felt from across the room,
Something poking at my eye
It was so painful to feel
I wished I could rather die.
We weren't meant to be,
But I still lived in a lie
And now when it's over,
It's so hard to say good-bye.
Then i felt her arms in mine
As she slowly came back to bed
Maybe we can leave this behind
As we both slowly laid to rest.
And there across the table
Covered in layers of red
There by them white flowers
Sat my lonely head.
Notes (optional)
494 · Aug 2022
'99
aviisevil Aug 2022
'99
far from this place
there is a september

that waits for us
with a golden sunrise

where siblings sing
in circles

holding hands like
they used to

back in '99

when this world was
a better place

grass was soft
and green

sky was big
and blue

whence dreams
never left

how quickly the
sun sets to the west

now that it's the
end of the world


@writeweird
493 · Feb 2017
beautifully ugly
aviisevil Feb 2017
with my head between my arms
and people screamin' all around

tryin' not to **** somebody

like a bored fish I'm out of breath
oh god, why did you make me..
and make me hate everybody ?

**** me already
I'm dead with feeling dread

and I can't relate to anybody

or anything that comes my way
and whatever I like goes away

so far away

and I'm just lost in my days
pretending to be in love with dark

fading and escaping
into a void every hour
with every scar that I'm keepin'

I'm afraid to share
what I've been dreamin'

if I pray would I be spared
can I leave them behind
do you go to hell for
thoughts that are stuck in your mind ?

caught this time
I swear I'll be a good kid next rhyme

when is it enough ?
to stop lying
does it matter when I'm crying,
will that save me ?

will that save me from trying

I'm so tired
of this sun shining all the time
can I paint it black
with sulphur and smoke
bleach and choke it
until it is fine

like I am
when they ask me my name

I wish I could drink all the rain
so they'll know my thirst

flood them with my pain
so they'll realise my hurt

look, a flower in the dirt
and they keep repeatin'

how they saw it first
the flower in the dirt


so why don't you pick it up ?
A chaotic mind is wonderful when it's about to rain.
490 · Jan 2014
Days oblivion
aviisevil Jan 2014
Quiteness of the night engulfs everything in its shadows
A pale refelection of the stars haunt the sky line
If you look close you can see a touch of  marrow
And can hear the whispers of darkness thats dying
Fading away every glorious moment and tear
As it bleeds for the yesterdays mistakes
Giving all to keep the serene silence near
No arms and legs to embrace but it waits
Powerful yet bleak with the strength of infinite men
it rules for its part before tasting the oblivion
Just around the corner of the world it bends
Than goes on forever with its radiance
To some it is the absence of light ,
Conquered by the might of the giant ball of helium
But to the nightly creatures and world
Its the onset of remarkable  beauty  and days oblivion.
488 · Dec 2014
Blasphemous philosophy
aviisevil Dec 2014
I saw death so close,
It was hard to close my eyes.
needles poked holes in the rose,
And he kept crying till he died.

I caught them sleeping-
Laid on a grave far too young.
I could hear a mother weeping,
For the dead daughters and sons.

Some had eyes to the sky,
Others were dreaming in a coffin.
But the reaper wore a smile,
Hands raised in a mocking.

An abyss was made in this sea,
As the reaper kept on walking.
I thought I heard something,
Then I saw the ashes falling.

Sometimes a road leads nowhere,
And you get too lost to be found.
I heard them one last time
then I saw children falling down.

Shattered windows were all around,
But in darkness there's no light.
And no truth is enough-
For the holy thief who lies.

A thousand people came,
All along waiting for this night.
But was it worth an end,
To a beginning that might unite.




And then I heard the screams,
Oh, the howl of horror and fear.
But the crying stopped in a blur,
For scars had swallowed all tears.

Winds brought me the noise,
Of mayhem and doom.
Drowning the voices,
That were yet to bloom.

So I fell on my knees,
Awaiting the fate of my faith.
And then I saw the reaper,
He had a very similar face.

Though his eyes were cold,
Dark as the depth of the sea.
Even though he was a monster,
He seemed very human to me.



Blood for blood,
I heard him whisper.
A Blasphemous philosophy,
And a reality that withers.

The violence fell silent,
As the shadow came nearer.
I searched for a place to hide,
But all that was left was a mirror.

So I hid behind his reflection,
As his image grew weaker.
And all the ghost could see-
Was a God in the mirror.
Notes (optional)
488 · Feb 2014
PARANOID
aviisevil Feb 2014
Time stands still as the approaching footsteps cut through the quietness  
She stands in the corner ,  her every part now drenched in darkness

Every thought that crosses her mind is now decayed and rotten
Every door that stands between 'her' and 'them' is now broken

She can even hear them whisper but the words are lost over her heart beat
How could she be so careless , she knew better to not fall asleep

She knows they want her and they're just waiting for the right time
Nobody else can see them but she knows its not just in her mind

She knows better to not trust anyone , everyone else is blind
They took them all away , anyone that left her behind

She waits now , silently , for them to come near and show their face
She's changed now , slowly , in the mirror there's a smile on her face







__________


"i think someone is watching over us"
-no there's no one in the room love
"i can feel them lurking in the shadow"
-i don't think so, every door is shut
" i had a bad dream last night"
-did you take your pills on time?
"i couldn't see their faces in moonlight"
-don't worry , everything's 'gonna be fine
"and the front door was left open"
-was that a part of your dream too?
"every picture frame was broken"
-are you sure , it wasn't you ?
"i know it wasn't just a dream"
-but there's no broken frame anywhere
"I'm sure of what I've seen "
-there must be something some where
"i know you don't believe me"
-i want to but i know its all in your mind
"i know they can see me"
-but there's 'gotta be some sign
"its right there but you can't see"
-I've to leave I'm running late
"you know , we can never be free"
-have to increase the dose you take
"so you're 'gonna leave me alone"
-there's no one here , it'll be alright
"I'm so scared of the unknown"
-I'll be back before the night
"don't leave me , they'll **** me"
-stop being so paranoid
"come here , be with me "
-hush now , just be quite


__________


"they came for me last night"
-I'm sorry i had to stay back
"are you even listening to me"
-i think you've gone mad
"please, believe me , all i say is true"
-i can't live in these lies
"oh , now they want you too"
-what's happening to your eyes?
"i can't let them have you"
-oh , just stop it NOW
"you love me , don't you?"
-I'm not really sure now
"i thought you will trust me"
-i tried but it's now out of control
"please, be with me  , help me"
- you know what , I'm not sure
"I'm so scared , don't leave"
-you're just  insane
"so you don't believe"
- can't play your games
"i can't let you go"
-stop being a freak
"there's too much you know"
-yeah I'll tell them all that you're a freak
" come , i want to show you something"
-no,i really don't want to see
"for the last time "

".....than you can leave"






"do you like my new friend?"
-STAY AWAY FROM ME
"see how sharp it is at the end "
-DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH ME
"i can let you go , its not safe"
-PLEASE...i'm sorry...just let me go  
"don't worry , have faith"
-they'll know it was you , THEY'LL KNOW!
"they'll never have you , you're mine"
-PLEASE, PUT IT DOWN
"they're coming, don't have much time"
-are you 'gonna **** me now ? ,



-i know , you're 'gonna **** me


"stop being so paranoid "



-GET AWAY FROM ME



"hush now , be quite".
Notes (optional)
483 · Dec 2022
the end of summer
aviisevil Dec 2022

i am writing
about the end of
summer

terrible things that
keep me awake

extreme humour
and cheap whiskey

warm blanket on
a lonely tuesday

poems by Charles
Bukowski

i am writing
about the end of
my youth

there is not
much to write

most of us are
not important

the world is a
small place  

filled with
sad people in
tiny rooms

and they are
so unhappy

that they do not
care if it all ends
today.


aviisevil Sep 2022
comfort my mind
touch my skin

make me believe
i am here

here

i breathe nothing
i see nothing

how can i tell
anything apart?

you tell me to
sing my name

what's my name?

am i not yours
to keep

what am i
living for

is there more
to me

will i ever be
enough just for one?



how far can
i run

before i leave
me behind

is there a mountain
i can spend

between green
grass blue skies

it must mean
something

surely

things should mean
something

anything but this
sinking feeling

that keeps me awake
when i'm dying

do you know how
it feels to die

to die

how can i tell
anything apart?

when i'm never
here

when i'm already
gone

how sharp is a
memory

to cut through
the bones

the heart keeps
knocking


nobody's home
nobody's home
nobody's home

anymore





@writeweird
478 · Jan 2021
where the day's end
aviisevil Jan 2021
look at home,

the night is dark
and yet forgetful

warm room with
bodies sound asleep

cosy air breathes
through the windows

as the leaves fall
somewhere in the future

and a rainy day
is on the offering

carelessly stoking
arms of the clock

it's a shelter still
this warm room

filled with things
that will be --

old and dying,

as the leaves fall
somewhere in the future

for enough springs have
come to pass

now that i sit here
looking at old photographs,

visiting home.
this poem is about time and progression, memories, nostalgia, golden days and dark cold nights. I miss what has happened, and I'm afraid of what is going to be.
476 · Jan 2015
A clown never lies
aviisevil Jan 2015
Here we are again
Forgotten how we were made
Somewhere lies our pain
Tomorrow too far to escape

Would you still seek me
If I told you about my stains
Remembering how it all used to be
Nothing ever remains the same
Something's hiding behind your stare
And I keep forgetting your name
All I have left is your beautiful face
And a promise to hold you again
How wide is the scar on your lips
Would you ever smile again
You have bought and sold me
Now I am all yours to claim

Come hold me once again
Take me away from myself
Every breath still feels so strange
Losing everything I've ever felt
Your memories are so far
Trying to reach through the scars
There's no one left to feed me
We have consumed all we are
Clawed our way through the sky
Drank ourselves all the rain
And you never turned to ask why,
Why the season never changed.

Claim me and make me
The image you want to see
Bury me in your colour
And set me free
I have all you ever wished to be
All the love you want to keep
Take my heart and drink the sea
And let me bleed
Bleed away all the pain you see
We'll never ever be free
Not when the door is open
And it's so much more hard to leave

Something is eating me alive
And I have no one to blame
Nothing to give you but myself
So eat me and free me-
From these chains.

This cage tastes ever so sweet
Haunt me like you always did
Come back and want me again,
And break me in pieces
Burn me to ashes and feed on it.

So consumed by our own curse
We let the magic die
Swallowed the pills of hurt
And bade our good-byes
Our tears bleed no more
Now there's nothing in your eyes
Whatever this tale was worth for
You made a fool of me-
And a clown never lies.
Notes (optional)
aviisevil Jan 2014
Behind all those giggles and smiles
There are tears of pain
Inside this emptiness
There's a boy , trying to be whole again

He writes long stories ,
Want someone to read between the lines
Look what he's upto
He tells it all in rhymes

He knows it's his own fault
But he never chose to be this way
Friends and enemies alike
No one comes his way

So don't tell him ,
how much you care
Because when the time comes
No one is there to share

He Dosent need the crowd
Just the one
But maybe he's doing it wrong
Because he can't find that someone

And he's given up hope and faith
He knows , He can't hide from fate
Still he has locked himself inside those doors
Unseen , living for just a few moments more

Living on borrowed time
He has to wait some more
Looking for the right time
Before he's gone

He wants to scream in their faces
And tell them what it's like to be
But all he can do is whisper
And hope someday they could see

That the little boy , Is gone for good
In peace , he'll be cold
He was there when no one else was
Empty stories needn't be told

Maybe love can change it all
Make him turn around
But no one loves him
In time , He will fall down

In time , in his mind
He knows whats true
He's wise , he can't survive
On borrowed time he's alive

Still he's holding on
Maybe somewhere in the crowd
Someone will look through those eyes
Behind all those lies
Someone will finally know why he cries

But in time ,

the little boy , will be gone for good
In peace , he'll be cold
He was there when no one else was
Empty stories needn't be told




The stars will still shine
And the crowd will still smile
But somewhere far away
It will rain

There will still be the sunrise
Ain't a thing that'll change
But somewhere far away
It will pain

From far away
Whispers will turn to screams
Empty echoes no one could hear
In time , it'll all be clear


That the little boy , Is gone for good
In peace , he'll be cold
He was there when no one else was
Empty stories needn't be told
474 · Apr 2021
the mighty have fallen
aviisevil Apr 2021
between, there lies my burden
on my knees i am but a servant

serving at your feet as i've done
a thousand times before

swollen gaze
resting upon your eyes

i can't flinch
and catch me by surprise  

bound in chains, kissed by
******* --

i want to taste your
addictive lies

corrupted conscience
lost in sermons

you're so vindictive it'll
never suffice

you and i cannot
survive

in this malfunctioning
world

spiralling through summer
as it grows

into autumn, uncertain,
of the winter that passes by

in that weakness i find myself
drawn to you

in your arms of ruthless
subversion

suffocate me with your
fruitful diversions

the more i am awake
more it worsens

i'm barely alive haunted
by desertion

desperate for an escape
from this burden

yours even   ever after,
i am truly yours.
you can't have everyone, everyone can't have you.
472 · Aug 2022
nobody's home
aviisevil Aug 2022
comfort my soul
touch my hand

make me believe
i am here

here

i breathe nothing
i see nothing

how can I tell
anything apart?

you tell me to
sing my name

what's my name?

am i not yours
to keep

what am i
living for

is there more
to me

will i ever be
enough for one

how far can
i run

before i leave
me behind

is there a mountain
i can spend

between green
grass blue skies

it must mean
something

surely

things should mean
something

anything but this
sinking feeling

that keeps me awake
when i'm dying

do you know how
it feels to die

to die

how can i tell
anything apart?

when i'm never
here

when i'm already
gone

how sharp is a
memory

the heart keeps
knocking

nobody's home
nobody's home
nobody's home

anymore





@writeweird
aviisevil Feb 2017
I see this world rotating hanging upside down
with all of these voices screaming in my head and in the background
Like a pendulum I swing back and forth and up again
I ******* tears leaving me.. I think it's about to rain

And I wonder if it's my time ?
And I wander in my filthy mind...

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never ever be



My thoughts are collapsing in the noise of silence
Blood rushing to my brain and I'm tasting the violence

How the hell did I find my way back here again ?
After a thousand memories as if nothing has changed
And it's all still the same

Can somebody cut the rope.. too much pressure on my veins
And I'm seeing things that cannot be


And I wonder where's my mind ?
And I wander in my filthy mind

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never surely be

It hurts so bad and I'm normal once again
Only if for a moment..
I love when my dreams get me insane

I see the kids playing in dirt and killing all the flowers
I remember how I ate away the guilty world of ours
Just hanging by a thread and it's now bleeding me the years
And I'm afraid if I don't find a doctor soon I won't even be here

To tell you I took more than my share
And maybe that's why I'm all so f*cked up and alone there
In that space
Just hanging..


Can you not hear me ?
I've been doing things to gather your attention
I've done so much that nothing gives me the satisfaction
Twisted moments give me nothing but another dose of pain
Like a pendulum I swing back and forth and up again

Can't you see ?
All I ever wanted was to be free


And I wonder if it's my time ?
And I wander in my filthy mind

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never truly be


Find me a potion and make me a person again
I've met all of your flavours and I want it plain
Give me poison.. I want the erosion
I don't want to be left the same



I've been awake every night I have lived in a hope to be found
And now i can't see the sun for it hurts my eyes
I've forgotten how it sounds

outside

Besides,

Way out in the woods you'll find me reaching inside my throat
Pulling out my insides so I can find my heart and build myself a boat

I've been drowning since forever and I'm feeling like a broken home
Go away from me now.. I don't ever want you to see me this open and alone

This is not how I am

I'm more than I pretend to be

Can't you see what I'll never be ?

Can you save me from me ?

Can you pretend you see what I want you to see ?



And I wonder if it's my time ?
And I wander in my filthy mind

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never ever be
I'm not sure what I mean anymore. Give up on writing ?
471 · Mar 2015
Save yourself some tears
aviisevil Mar 2015
Save yourself some tears
My love, it's alright
Come, I'll hold you near
And be with you all night

Take my arms
And lay your head
Stay close, dear
So I can feel your breath

Let me breathe you now
Taste you and caress your all
Come, I'll learn you now
Tonight we'll bring down the walls

I'll kiss you ever so softly
With all the love I bear
Embrace you, my only
And You'll have no nightmares

Show me your heart
And I will give you mine
Morning's not that far
We don't have much time

So take off your mask
And she me your face
Quick now, I ask
Before I wake

Love me while it lasts
And till the darkness fades
A shadow our love casts
In love tonight we'll be made

There's no need to fear,
I am here and I'll never leave
Save yourself some tears,
And I'll make them mine to keep

I will keep you in me,
From the hands who pry
We were meant to be
And I know that's not a lie

I hope that you can hear me,
My girl, you don't have to cry
Save yourself some tears,
And I'll drink the rest from your eyes
Notes (optional)
aviisevil Jun 2018
find me and tell me,
that it wasn't easy.

blind me and sell me,
hell with me, i wasn't easy.

mind me and spell me,
paint me in dusk and daisies.

remind me of the hell in me,
tell me, how it consumed me maybe..

baby, lately.. it's been...
it's been hazy.

if you ever find love,
find me and tell me
that I wasn't crazy.

it was always true.
469 · Oct 2014
Death
aviisevil Oct 2014
Things fall in place,
Out of star-dust-
A life takes a face.
In the sudden morn',
A new tale is made;
Past wouldn't be forgotten-
But yet it fades.

It builds from the roots,
Into the branches-
those span the horizon;
weather begins to change,
Seasons bring the age-
And thus begins the erosion.

Though yet it does grows,
Now more than ever.
Ushering into a beautiful flower-
In that moment forever;
For the time never withers,
It stays such-
Always together.

Embracing what there is,
Tested by the years-
In a hurry to depart.
An ocean of every wish,
Of smile and tears-
To be contained in a heart.

Touching what is around,
Sometimes in silence-
But every move makes a sound.
Flying ever so high-
Knowingly,
That one day all must come down
And be spent,
To the ruins it was always bound.

Rusting every winter,
With a hope of a new spring.
To lay claim as own-
Of everything let in.
Changing with every breath,
Only to shed the same skin;
A voice that will be lost-
But never afraid to sing.

The lies won't hide the truth,
Or make the last step-
Disappear.
For as far as you look,
One can see the signs-
Of what was once here.

Though the heart beats,
And the memories still speak-
No matter how much it weeps;
You have to leave.
No matter what you'll keep,
Bury it somewhere deep-
The dark will seep;
And the tale will be freed.

Things will again fall in place,
Journey never forgets a face-
For time always move along.
With all our right and wrong,
No matter how short or long;
Somewhere at the end-
We'll have to finish the song.
At end of the maze,
When done with the chase-
I know I'll be too tired to go on.
Notes (optional)
467 · Jun 2015
winter
aviisevil Jun 2015
winter falls across the face
dancing down from the clouds
as the ink consumes a page
i see thunder roaring bright and loud
hear me, roar
i heard them voices
whispering to the winds
i remember another lore
one memory divided
dangling by the strings
i can still feel their presence
in these moments passing by
i see the painting on my wall
sometimes I hear a mother cry
as I find myself lost again
in the comfort of a winters gloom
it has been so long and
i haven't seen the flowers bloom
I've forgotten how to breathe
and the cold have made me numb
I'm too old to leave now
and see what I could've become
so I watch the winter fall
watch as it begins to fill the hole
Oh, the winter
it swallows it all
anything shining or withered
leaving behind
only the fading footsteps
and the whispers.
Notes (optional)
465 · Jul 2017
Goodbye
aviisevil Jul 2017
you're still as beautiful as the morning sky, the reason to my rhyme,

don't care about that many miles, i don't have any lines to combine,

words don't save you when you're blind.

i needed somebody and i found you,

so thank you for being there for me, when it was the time,

i'm so sorry that i had so much hate in me, that i wasn't right in my mind,

but i hope you're alright and everything's fine, you still smile-

and that you're closer to that place that you always wanted to find,

i know you have it in you to shine, bird, i know it now, i knew it then, when you were mine.  

so one of a kind, but i guess it's fine 'cause we are all designed to forget with time

and before i do, i want to say thank you before i forget you, and after all it's you,

so i don't have to say anything to you, for the laughter was true, as true as you was and I,

and i know you'll miss me too, it's a good-bye.
Let them fly.
463 · Mar 2018
Man in the sky
aviisevil Mar 2018
you suffer,
and so, you learn-
talk about stars and lovers,
through scars, and
how they don't burn anymore

dreaming eyes,
dream about the dreadful lies;

the man in the sky,
isn't here sitting besides you-

the woman you pry;
maybe she's slick and sly,
it makes you sick,
and you wonder why ?

maybe it isn't about
love anymore.


the world has summer,
and it had your winter-

autumn withers'
spring too;

and the man in the sky,
he isn't sitting there anymore

the child you could see
in the mirror, died;

he's no more, maybe-
only as much as you are today;

and the bird you
could've freed;

you placed silence by
its side, and a song
on it's beak, so bleak-

bleached by the solemn
good-bye, and a seed,

praying, it becomes a tree,
and not a storm.
462 · Oct 2019
Devils pariah
aviisevil Oct 2019
cut open the lamb
give in to your scars

there's only a whisper
to comfort your soul


wandering the lands
searching the stars

world's going to wither
back to the cold



find me in your dreams
strangle my breath

look away when i scream
you don't have to be here
with me inside my head


you're torn at the seam
in same ways as i

i'll tell you all that i've seen
only if you promise
you'll be here when i die



in the forests green
where the devil spies

will you find me there
even if i never tell you why ?
master at peace
aviisevil Mar 2016
One..two..three..

Sleep..


confusion creates ripples
Blurred faces and hushed whispers
All across the place where it stands
So many thoughts unraveling
Flowering into the empty space
in a voice i do not understand



Do what makes you happy
For in time you'll be empty
The day will be spent
With nothing to repent
And tomorrow will be gone
For an eternity




Ask yourself when you can
Was it all worth it ?


The dream you've been living
Did you ever find it ?




My heart simmering in warm glow-
Of the heavens angels those sing
Falling in love with my wishful dreams
Screaming about my lonely sin
in a way i do not understand






I am crawling back to deep slumber
With all that maths
and all those numbers
Staring at me from the corner
Of the coming december




As i sit and,




Separate the two faces staring at the wall
Before the blues infects the tear drops





Do not whisper
Close your eyes
And just breathe

Do not linger
Let it all die
So you can leave





Pretend to be someone else
It's easy to lie and fade
You can almost see yourself
In pieces you've been made

The dreams you've been chasing
You're never going to catch it
What else are you still looking for
Do you think you'll ever find it




As i sit and,



Break the two hearts beating as one
I know, there's only room for one




No it's not weird
When no one seems to understand
Sometimes it's not real
Like a broken castle in the sand


Let them all disappear
Now there's nobody here
They're all gone

Do you still feel naked
Are you still scared
Was it the fear all along ?




Slow down and freeze
Into another moment and drown
Can you feel the torment
Of being never found
Even when they're all around




Just when you're smiling
You're about to cry
Everything you've been missing
And you don't know why



Something is always missing
So
You've painted the night
With a million stars you'll never see
In a hope the sun sets one day
And we could be free



Wake up..



One..two..three
(**** - Radiohead) in the background.
461 · Jul 2015
a loving betrayal
aviisevil Jul 2015
Oh, my sweet love
take a bite out of my heart
consume me now
Give me another scar

every answer is a needle
tearing a hole in my eyes
Powdered glass in the middle
slitting my questions in lies

taking a cue from your book
another clue for an aries demise
oh, my dear take a look
a broken heart never been more wise

spell those names on a platter
by a shattered mirrors calm
keep my tears drawn in the clouds
painted in someone else's arms

so take me before I disappear
layered between hollow and dust
wake me before I can appear
before i dream about you my love

so chain me through the walls
where I can see you fade and cry
I am nothing for I've given you all
but there's not enough fuel to die

find me in the slums down on earth
with dirt you've smeared my home
enough tears can even sink the ocean
what are few words carved on a stone

it takes a while for them to leave
a crowd of faces come and gone
leave me alone before I believe
lore of a terrible queen left alone

pretend I have nothing to forgive
remember what I've said before
chase your light in the sky and live
for I can't keep you from being dead anymore
Notes (optional)
458 · Apr 2016
what i wear
aviisevil Apr 2016
I wish I could turn back time and see if I wasn't loved
every time I see something I have this urge to put it in words
draw across the canvas of nonsense, I know there's little time
I'm painted so ugly that I don't walk in sunshine

I have no idea what to do with
all this pain
so I paint another face and give it
a new name
    and the smoke chokes all as I wait
for the rain
I turn my back to the wall and the
canvas is blank again


I'm here, I'm screaming, I swear it was there
I don't think I'll be leaving, I'm still breathing what I wear



sometimes my voice gets lost
in the silence I make
I wonder how many more lie's
my conscience can take
I know I'll change into a monster
before I ever escape
My mind feels so strange
after the lights fade

I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve
i'm wearing a smile on my face
It is so hard to live and breathe
when you're suffering
from your own mind and space



it gets so lonely after a while
that I can only feel my own face
my heart is still young and vile
searching for an unknown place
I'm so far from home
I think I've forgotten where I'm from
as I count my steps so I can go black
when the sun's in shade



*I'm here, I'm screaming, I swear it was there
I don't think I'll be leaving, I'm still breathing what I wear


I'm here, I'm screaming, I swear it was there
I don't think I'll be leaving, I'm still breathing what I wear
457 · May 2022
everybody hates me
aviisevil May 2022







i hate it here where
everybody hates me

behind boarded windows
where ghosts chase me

i hate it here where
everybody hates me

trapped in thoughts
those that now scare me

i hate it here where
everybody hates me

here in this empty room
where silence shapes me

i hate it here where
everybody hates me

made in tears and now
an ocean drapes me

lonely as i suffer and no
one's there to wake me

caught in war as
armies invade me

i hate it here where
everybody hates me

i hate it here where
everybody hates me

i hate it here

everybody hates me













poetry is a labour of love, but love isn't hope, or light, it can be dark and cruel and inflict conflict in its mayhem and leave bones and forests in it's path.. but what it truly is, is a gateway, from me to you, and to the universe, the language of gods and mortals alike, it is the river that feeds the benign existence, and give life to the corpses circling the purgatory, it is what you want it to be, and it's yours forever to keep and breathe and whisper.
457 · Dec 2015
you were, you are..
aviisevil Dec 2015
You were my peace, the beauty of this world;
You were my calm and ecstasy.
You were my heart beat, you were my drug;
You were my all, and you'll always be.

you are my pain, the dream I always remember;
you are the reason why I'm afraid to fall asleep.
you are my spring and the winter of December;
now that you are gone, i cannot even breathe.

you were my savoir, arms that kept me warm;
you were my home that held me from the storms,
now the rains drown me and I have no place to be;
longing for your embrace, soon the silence will **** me.

you are my darkness, that feeds on my soul;
without you I cannot leave, I will never be whole.
you are the emptiness that echoes through my being,
you are more than the years that are slowly growing old.

you were my moon, the light brighter than the sun;
you were the tale that kept me from closing my eyes.
you were the fire, that kept me alive and now it burns;
you were the reason why I never separated truth from the lies.

you are my sorrow, you are the face that never fades;
you will haunt me evermore, as you cut me like a blade.
you are the reason, for every demon I ever made;
and you shall be my death, as you were my life-
my love, it will all be over soon, you don't be afraid.*


Everything I was, was yours to keep;
Now all I am, I do not need.
When I'll be gone, I know you wouldn't weep.
For It's time you wake up and I fall asleep.
456 · Apr 2016
I kill people: extracts
aviisevil Apr 2016
I'll eat you in your own kitchen.
It wasn't a pleasant start was it ?
...Let me start on a different note. 


How about a story on Bratt ?

Bratt was funny maybe a little quirky but man did he deserve his fate ?. Maybe not but again - I'm an animal. A disease that rots you from inside out and slowly devours you until your last moment, where i feed you to the fire and burn you alive. While i dance as you scream and sing as you begin to fade. I am that kind.
The most disgusting sight you'll ever have the pleasure to witness. I wear a heart of different kind but let me sing about bratt first..

He lay on the grass-
Ever so softly he wept,
Eyes watching everywhere,
As he drips in sweat
Anticipating my company
And withering in fear 
Oh, that moment
I can't bear,
I hear a song,
Of a different kind.
A symphony so beautiful,
Playing on my mind.
And then I dance,
Oh, I eat upon his grave,
And I can see god,
As just the light fades.


I thought that was too many emotions on a single page and i can't help myself for being a sappy poet riddle maker.

I strangled that kid. Then I ate him. I ate him. Enough about me though, I'll tell you a story, read very carefully.

Once I met a man
Eyes I couldn't understand
The air 
Ate away all the sand 
But the hourglass
Still pour
And upon his ashes 
A phoenix soar.
His wings mighty 
In its shadow I saw the stranger 
And I heard his whisper 
I was the death angel 
So I pushed him inside
Till I saw my mother 
She was screaming something
But I couldn't no more 
Ask my little brother.


That's rotten, I made no sense there. Did I ?. I mean I can clearly understand what the heck I just wrote but someone reading this might not. Danm he won't. It was my dad, he started all this. Fed my delusion that violence is the key to all happiness. I was smart though, and with a little hygiene, I am in a much better shape. I'm not blaming him, I'm sure those fancy doctors and scientists will all agree with me. Let me write something for them as well.


Ugly duckling never became
-Beautiful.


That's all I can preach about it. It's complicated. Now, I would present my case to you, so you can judge me better. I once killed a little girl because her mother couldn't take care of her properly. I felt pity. See, I am capable of pity. My point is, I killed a little girl out of pity, then I ate her. That brings us to another glimpse of utter nonsense.


I once killed a man 
Because he was happy 
And I once killed a man 
Because he was sad 
I once killed a man 
Because he was sappy 
Oh, I once killed a man 
And then I killed his dad.

I love twosomes, three is crowd, and I would like to point out, I am a bad man, If you haven't noticed thus far. You can either **** me or I keep on killing. Ask yourself 'what would have god done' ?... nothing. He doesn't gives a **** about you, why would he ?. If he did, why did he make me ?. So, I can **** innocent people. What exactly is mysterious about this plan ?. He enjoys when I **** people or why wouldn't he stop me. I don't believe in god though, just messing with you delusional kind. You can all believe in a man floating in the sky but the truth is, I am your god when I **** you. Trust me on this, god is in everyone. You just have to claim him. 


I ate little birds,
When I was small.
Then I ate a cat,
When I got a little tall.
I have so many creatures,
Hidden inside the walls.
But believe me when I say,
I drank all their tear drops-
Every last of them.

Well, the reason I wrote all this down is because I want someone to know my whole story, right from the start till the very now, But again I can't let them walk away. So, I do this thing. I tell them everything. 

Claim me your king 
Let the metal sing 
Kiss you, and bid you bird
So long, fly.
Now close your eyes 
Stop believing your lies 
You are nothing ever-more 
I am your king,
I whisper and you die.
If you turn around 
you can see
I have an axe,
Good-bye.
455 · Dec 2017
Put me on fire
aviisevil Dec 2017
i'm in a war zone, with rage in my bones, with stick and stones, so sick and tired of the ones gone,
i feel so alone, on my own, with brick and fire, building myself a safe haven,
where i won't be mistaken, for mistakes and scratched lines,
i'm too attached to my mind, i don't see the outline, I don't care for time,
it's just a needle going back and forth, and before you tell me I'll grow old,
i'm already dead, and I know you already know,
if somebody cut open your head, it'll be as ugly as mine,
if somebody cut open your heart, it'll be as cold as mine,
this world taught us we'll be fine, it'll rip us apart before we ever see the shine, sun-shine

there's sun to shine,
in sun shine,
there's nothing to be afraid of,
you see them lying,
you see them crying,
you see them be lost,
oh, you see them crying,
you see, there's only one kind,
the one nobody minds,
there's only one sun to shine,
in sun shine-
there's nothing to be afraid of,
nobody's dying,
everything will be fine,
act surprised, they don't know
what you are made of.

and I'm not the king, oh no,
I'm not the slave,
I don't have the comfort of knowing,
I'm just growing old,
so rotten and cold, maybe it's forgotten,
and I am back in autumn,

so hold onto this torch for me,
and put me on fire if someday I do not wake, that's why I put my voice on tapes,
I don't have a choice, there's only noise
and it does not fade,
put me on fire if I do not break,
if I do not wake, if I do not hate,
put me on fire if I do not fade.


let's talk, just you and me, let's talk-
just you and see, let's take a walk,
count, one, two, three and down,
one for free, drown for thee,
there's nobody else,
who has seen the hell, you claim to be
handful of scars and nothing else to see,
mindful, any day could be your last,
don't ask too many questions,
there's no need for emotions,
there's no need to bleed on vacations,
don't worry about annihilation, for the duration-
sorry, but only the man with gold deserves standing ovation,
and you can't get in, all the tickets sold,
this place is wicked,
the face is sick and wet,
with all those tears and years it was fed lies, they say in heaven nobody dies and everybody is happy,
and anybody who's anybody gets what they like, rich folks,
with their fancy hair and dyes,
ugly teeth, can't you see,
they are as empty as you and I,
it's all the same, and we shouldn't take no name,
we don't know what's sane anymore, we act surprised,
all we do is write stories and complaint, maybe we're all the same,
maybe it's just one huge game, there are a few but not many who can tame,
that beast inside of us, full of love, don't mention the stuff in your veins,
put things in motion, and everybody is now chasing erosion, like some form of poison, pacing up and down in their minds,
inside, in oceans,
outside there are these walls,
can't be broken,
there are no doors, so, therefore
there's nothing to open,
I'm just awoken, and maybe I'll go
back to sleep,
sing for me, dream, scream for me,
grin for me, take the smoke in for me,
choke on your thoughts,
caught up in your rot,
you ought to be ashamed you see, doing things your mamma, did not
want to see, tell me,
is this what they wanted you to be ? but **** them right ?
they don't see what you can see,
they cannot hear what you wear, they cannot
feel what you feel,
so, steal away all their time, don't mind,
they were never the equation, and you were never patient, they are ancient,
that's how you were raised, the weaker gets eaten up by the invasions,
nobody is anybody just names on a page,
this world is nothing, it's everything, it's a cage-
and I'm not the king, oh no,
I'm not the slave, I don't have the comfort of knowing,
I'm just growing old, so rotten and cold, maybe it's forgotten, I'm back in autumn, so hold this torch for me,
and put me on fire if someday I do not wake, that's why I put my voice on tapes,
I don't have a choice, there's only noise
and it does not fade,
put me on fire if I do not break,
if I do not wake, if I do not hate,
put me on fire if I do not fade.
454 · Jul 2018
rest in pieces
aviisevil Jul 2018
melancholy sits on the
pavement, on a cold autumn day.
enjoying the music of a
thunderstorm, and screaming.

dreaming about the winter
yet to come, become grey.

submerged in the tunes
of a dark morning that is seeding,
beyond what any words can
convey or design.

watching the elements
of the sky growing and leaving.

how silently this picturesque
of almost nothing,
captures the lonely corners of my
unfathomable inflammable mind.
454 · Dec 2018
i don't like the company
aviisevil Dec 2018
little people
small people
people full of scars

riddle me people
why the feeble mind ?

why bother time
with your reaper's heart ?

cry with me,
when I read you your tar,

filthy hands, guilty stars
many men, any man-
but yet i see no flowers

nobody's awake at this hour

and i've slowly spent all my
will to live,
i repent the kind man who
sought this thrill to give,

frozen smile, stuck by the clock;
locked in place and stiff,
opened files, an omen dies,
and he spoke with a slight lisp

munching on something
light and crisp,
searching for nothing,
nothing's as vile and sick;

reaching for that one thing-
that gun thing, them rocks and sticks,

how about that sun thing ?
what would a son think,
when he's burdened by the mist,
pretending to be human enough
to pretend that he's amiss,

amidst the chaos and the risks,
forgotten names and letters,
from faces that he don't miss-

and they think it gets better
the more you drink and fish,
so ink yourself a moon, and
buy yourself a letter-
so, you can sin, sing and wish

for some time alone.
454 · Sep 2017
Beautiful Death
aviisevil Sep 2017
A silent symphony plays in the background
Soothing the atmosphere of its whispers and tears 

There's an aroma of quietness all around 
A hint of madness in serenity it bears 

Tommorows cease to exist from now on,
and can you not hear ?

Life singing the yesterday's songs,
To be lost in the approaching calmness my dear 

Time slows down to a halt 
Too tired to move and caress the impending doom 
And night saves the memory to be kept in a vault;
Safe and hidden from the looming gloom.

And I lie in ecstasy 
a dream I longed to dream 

A fading reality 
To be erased of all that I've seen 

And I recall my oldest friend 
A hope that I banished long ago 
But it haunts me again in the end 
And the hope to feel alive grows 
A spark in the embed darkness 
Ignites the desires I locked away 
And it possess me once again 
To let me please my whites and greys 

And I bleed of all that poison 
That this world and I brew 
Letting go of all the answers 
That once my soul knew 
Slowly but surely 
The coldness I nurtured, is replaced by the warmth of my sin,

And I wonder with peace 
What the morrow may bring ?

And I wonder with peace 
When the morrow may ring ?

And I dream away my life 
As I exhale my last precious breath 

Forever lost in my sweet dream 
into the approaching beautiful death.
453 · Feb 2014
different
aviisevil Feb 2014
Wore your old shoes
A walk to where you are    
on different road

got your old blues
an ocean in my heart
a different boat  

the same window
looking at the stars
a different view

In same clothes  
mirror on the wall
a different you

Taste of your words
Written on the same page
a different tale

Made of hurt
Trapped in the same cage
a different place
Notes (optional)
453 · Feb 2015
A phobia in dark
aviisevil Feb 2015
Sleep my friend,
Fall back to the somber abyss
You're very near the end,
In a moment you'll cease to exist
Don't resist-
The gentle breeze
Soak it in,
And Leave it be
Free.

Dream my friend,
Let them wings strangle you.
Arisen then,
Every dream has to pay its dues.
Windfall kiss the air,
A sweet scent nobody can explain
Let it spread everywhere,
And Consume you now again
In pain.

Now open your eyes,
Clear the skies
Look around yourself,
And ask the reason why
There's something there-
With you,
Something sinister,
A monster you brew.

Demons and angels,
Resting side by side.
In a hollow that lingers,
Across and wide.
So take on your blanket,
And hold yourself tight.
Give in to your despair,
For In dark-
There's no place left to hide.




Are you aware ?
Of loneliness that's stalking,
Mourning on a bed
Not yet ready to sleep.
Do you hear,
The silence talking.
Walking on four legs-
And Ready to feed.
Notes (optional)
453 · Mar 2018
Raw of the land
aviisevil Mar 2018
somebody save me,
have me; love me;
tell me i'm living for something,

hold me, unfold me;
it's cold and lonely
by myself; tell somebody
to solve me, dissolve me
into pieces and find me
before i make a castle with
no doors or windows,

inhale walls and fences,
to fail my days for empty nights,

to sail on sand, in search
of an ocean, that bled
when i pulled out my broken heart;

take me and give me up
to the waves, as i age;
before any realisation,

give me a page and let me
be lost at the sea,
miles away from any
civilization.
453 · Aug 2015
i have died
aviisevil Aug 2015
my hurt has a sinister ire
fire burning what had been sane
ashes and dust make a sapphire
I still feel the same again
****** my every desire
so I can only know the pain
more corpses on streets to hire
I am just one of the strange

i had something but no words to speak
all I could see was who left and came
in all of those lies I once let breed
i somewhere forgot my own name


i have died years ago but I am still awake
my heart is lost but I still hear my soul
I wouldn't know the monsters I have made
but I know the secrets I never told
by a lonely corner where I would wait
breathing more despair and cold
you wouldn't know how many scars it takes
to not remember who you are anymore
Notes (optional)
452 · Sep 2015
love burnt
aviisevil Sep 2015
numb fingers don't burn
cold heart won't scream
what have we become
how long has it been
when you and i were in love
but now as i look back it seems  
we were dawn and dusk
and maybe it was all a dream
a clock ticks by magic tricks
what is gone shall never return
keeping tears hidden in mist
there are more things to burn
Notes (optional)
451 · Feb 2014
tears she drops
aviisevil Feb 2014
Every word is a mirror
every refelction is full of lies
Her every breath makes her see
What she could never see in her eyes

Every scream is a wall
ecplises all from her sight
Every thought wants to be free
And find him where ever he  hides

Her love is full of pain
Every moment is full of hurt
She stabs herself again and again
But there are only tears and no blood






she waits for her time
For the winds to take her away
Away from all that she knows
She dosent wants to stay
For she has felt too much
It will last her a lifetime
With every touch
She's losing her Mind
Losing herself
She wants to leave it behind
Her heart , her days
Every memory thats dying


Her every tear is a scar
That reminds her of his name
In her arms she holds his cold heart
And she knows she'll never love again  

Her nights are nightmares
And now shes too afraid to sleep
His love still follows her everywhere
And She'll always be his dream to keep

Every word is a mirror
every refelction is full of lies
Her every breath makes her see
What she could never see in her eyes


She still waits for him
To come back in her life
Take her with him
Where she can be alive
All she can do is sing
So he can find his way home
In her arms
Where he'll never be alone
she waits for her time
For the winds to take her away
Away from all that she knows
She dosent wants to stay





  
And you can hear her sing..

'Tears I drop
Are blown away
With the winds
I hope they reach
Where they belong
While I sing
Tears I drop
Are blown away
In search of him
I hope I reach
Where he is now
While I sing'
Notes (optional)
450 · Sep 2015
sin of the sick
aviisevil Sep 2015
I am weak, I am sick
so hungry that
I can even eat my skin
my thirst
is burning my heart
as I rust and
bleed in the pit
drinking my blood black
and drowning in
an ocean of sin
being carried to the depths
of dark and more
where I am not
who I was anymore
only bones and flesh
monster without a master
I killed myself
and buried myself after
only to find me wandering
the corners of the mist
in deep, silence and wondering
if dark can speak through the hollow
echoing the voices of his
luring me out in the open
across doors hidden and broken
colours exploding in themselves
melding in a winter dream awoken
from a deep slumber
my years are only a number
of how long I have been
but not what I mean
and what i have seen
is more than I ever could be
the rage in my heart poisons
my eyes and my lies
inhaling numb tales and potions
portion of me not ready to die
believing seasons can linger
longer than the winter
before they wither
i hear them whisper
of the ones lost and taken
of the wise and mistaken
of the ones forsaken
born into this world
where chains set you free
and dreams slit your throat
i have more scars than me
you don't see through the smoke
you've kept me in
I can even eat my sin
i want to leave, i am sick
Notes (optional)
448 · Nov 2015
voices and tears
aviisevil Nov 2015
do you want to die ?

No..

then, why do you cry ?

i..i don't know


do you still deny ?

..what ?


lies ?
voices ?
dreams ?
life ?




the shadow creeps from within
forming a circle I cannot escape from
rings of smoke choke me inside this pit
where I have been since the beginning of time
consumed and alone
in my own
waiting..
thinking..
dreaming and mourning
sometimes the sunshine seeps through the cracks
and I can see every scar on the wall
tears begin to fall
and I know I have lost it all





is there nobody else ?

no..

do you remember yourself ?

I don't know

do you believe in hell ?

yes, it grows...


do you still deny ?

..what ?



pain ?
beauty ?
love ?
blame ?




the cold sets in every corner before converging into a singularity
and your mind loses control over your heart
have you ever seen a river cry ?
rain fly ?
because tears look like water from afar ?
like dried blood on a dead rose
breathing life into the beauty and its beautiful haunting
this deathly grim wanting
that lasts more than any day or night can swallow
and there is nothing in this hollow
either the silence  
or a whisper that fills the atmosphere with thunder and storm
there is no life to warm
the corpse






death has a solution, you know ?


can you let me go...


come near and I will show ?!


but i don't want to see.. I don't want to know


be one with the flow, can you let it go ?


no..



why deny then ?



because i would do it again.
Notes (optional)
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