We stopped talking but
you've messaged me four times now
to say I'm worthless.

I decided that
we weren't good as friends, and you
did just what you do.

Jay, I'm not asking
for your forgiveness, just that
you keep your silence.

I'm tired and longing
for a peace of mind you seem
eager to ******.

"Manipulative",
you texted me to say that
you were in Cleveland.

I read that message.
I waited three seconds and
I deleted it.

A long time ago,
yet so close to yesterday
I really loved you.

Your friends told you to
cut me out of your life, like
my friends said I should.

Neither were wrong, and
this is what it has come to.
This. This is the end.

Your interventions
always came up to protect
your own interests.

I said, "I love you"
while expecting nothing back,
and I got just that.

Silence, then, "I know."
Meanwhile Cleveland is on fire,
as I hold you close.
~
You ask me to stay,
but your kisses are so short
they fade on contact.

Like butter in a
hot skillet, or water, they're
evaporating.

Yet one is sweet and
the other is so common
it hardly matters.
~
I'm remembering,
the winter we first met, where
I had first kissed you.

Then you disappeared
for three short years or something
pretty close to that.

Reflecting winter,
the sun came up, you started
evaporating.
~
I'm leaving you at
the greyhound station when you
kiss me finally.

The finality
hangs on my lips for so long
it's hardly ended.

And just like starlight,
it takes billions of years.
It shimmers, it fades.

Cosmic suffering,
rattling of constellations.
New shapes in the sky.

Small in their own lives,
but creating new cultures
in ******* for us.

Volumes of white lies,
tenser deafening quiet,
and bright like a star.

Built as mountains are,
dense as the passing of time;
gone when morning comes.

Guys getting faded,
losing at Street Fighter 4.
I am among them.

I scream from passion,
and realize the sickness of
privilege congealed.

Less sleep, more caffeine.
Secondhand smoke and curse words,
trying to stay cool.

Keep it together,
breathe for just one second and
settle down tonight.

Irrelevant, but
today is just tomorrows
obscure reference.

They might be giants,
but you’re just one man, and it
slides right out of view.

I want to sleep in
a bed of sin and wake up
completely guilt free.

I wish I could get
baptized and wash all of the
**** out of my soul.

You tasteless morons;
Gnawing at whatever is
pandering to you.

Swallow your morals.
You eat art alive and you
consume artists whole.

******* cannibals,
devouring the message to
feel accomplishment.

Satisfied by trend
and over indulged by your
ideology.

This hole is a farm.
It's where we cut out our hearts
to feed our egos.