aurora: Favorites

Just, sit.
And stare.
And sit and stare.
And listen.
And move.
Then sit and move and listen.
And stare.
And wait.
And wait.

Oh wait maybe.
No.

****.

Mar 2014 aurora

Cognitive Dissonance

Mar 2014 aurora

Theia Gwen

Cognitive Dissonance

I'm so filled with self loathing
I have a problem believing
Anyone could love me
And then you happened
You, with your perfect grades,
And perfect family,
Perfect everything
It makes sense you'd want a perfect girlfriend
So why'd you settle for me?
Why am I next to you?
Me, the definition of average
It doesn't add up
Why is there an us?
Us, You and I
Perfect and average?
You're not a good liar
I can tell when you do
And it seems you're not lying
When you say "I love you"
I don't know what to think anymore
Because you've told me all the things
I never told myself
And I think I needed that
More than anything

Mar 2014 aurora

repetition

Mar 2014 aurora

pluie d'été

repetition

You listen
You don't listen
Do you

Whisper
The words you hate to say
I will nod
And smile
And you will
Never notice
Darkness
Tainting them

Your words
Stopped making sense
Weeks ago
And I'm sick
Of your rhyming
aa bb aa
a b a b a

Repetition
Leave me
It's easier
To believe in a dishonesty
When you hear it
Over and over

Mar 2014 aurora

Things I could never tell you

Mar 2014 aurora

DontLoveMeImBroken

Things I could never tell you

I'm horrible with words (not as bad as I am with silence)
They all make sense in my head, but I **** them up when I speak.
So I keep them to myself.
Because who the hell cares what I think about
music, and literature, and war, and you.
No one cares that I hate the color yellow,
And that I can't remember who sang that song,
And that I want to see that movie from the commercial.
And that I like it when I hold you at night.
I'm saying this for me
Because maybe it will help me communicate
Maybe it will help me articulate
Maybe it will help me formulate the words
Maybe it will help me tell you
That I love your smile, and your eyes,
And I hate not being with you
Because I still get butterflies
And I care what you think, and I want to keep you satisfied
Because I don't want you to leave.
But the words get lost between my thoughts and my mouth.
And I know you think about what I'm thinking
And wonder what thoughts I'm keeping
And try to figure out what I'm hiding
And why I won't tell you
That I can't live without you
or I won't live without you
or I don't want to live without you
or..
..**** it..

Mar 2014 aurora

confused

Mar 2014 aurora

ky

confused

first
you'll
find
a way
to
numb
the
pain
but
then
you'll
stick
a
razor
to your
skin
just
to
feel
again

Mar 2014 aurora

Wifey

Mar 2014 aurora

Macstoire

Wifey

For all of my younger life
I thought when I grew up I’d be a wife
But since when I met you
About this, I’ve thought twice
And I’ve wondered if it need be
Need I marry so eagerly?
Because right now
You are my company
And you’ll do for me
So I’m not so sure now
If I’ll need a wedding gown
Or for my Dad to walk me down
The aisle so soon
At this moment in time
Whilst you have been mine
It seems you’re all I need
More love would be greed
Yes, ******* our bond does lack
But we know we have each other’s backs
And trust is a key thing
My lifelong partner needs to bring
Other traits that you’ve got
Prove you have the lot
You’re a passionate cook
Generosity is your look
You bring with you fun
Share a love for the sun
You love a good dance
You’ll give anyone a chance
You entertain with your bands
You’re a helping hand
You see whilst you’re looking
You hear whilst you’re listening
And your singing is glistening
You do all these things just naturally
It seems you understand me
Which is why what we have works
And it will for eternity

So long as we don’t have to play scrabble in our retirement

For my best friend and life partner! Christmas 2013

Mar 2014 aurora

I Should Have Screamed More

Mar 2014 aurora

William A Poppen

I Should Have Screamed More

Fingers do a resolute tap, tap
on leather sofa arm.
Eyes shift upwards as
she enunciates each word
“I should have screamed
more.”

No longer does she live
like furniture
in a summer home,
hidden and covered
except when needed.

Newborn screams pierce
her coverings
and erupt, signaling
an end to her pretense.

Weary of repairing
other’s battered armor,
she hammers out
her own dents.

* for a friend, inspired by a friend.

Mar 2014 aurora

Breathless

Mar 2014 aurora

Pushing Daisies

Breathless

"Push harder"* I scream,
As your fists attempt,
To regain a pulse,
And send blood surging through,
My non-existent heart beat.

"Push harder" I scream,
As your lips dampen mine,
Transferring fresh air,
And leaving it to inflate,
My corrupted lungs.

"Push harder" I scream,
As your eyes stream wet tears,
But my mouth remains,
Motionless.

Your screaming for me.

*But I can't breath.

I can't breath...