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I am at a loss for words.
Why do I feel like a corpse
Day in, day out?
Today I am famished.
Not with a hunger to be satiated with thought
But with a candid urgency
And a hankering for vengeance.
I boil, I seeth.
I teeter on the brink.
I kiss with tongue
And spit out my entrails.
They say your ******* is just the end of your mouth,
But that's common sense.
Have you ever felt terror strike and shine
All down your spine?
Have you ever been unable to breathe?

Sometimes when it's cold outside
And you blow cigarette smoke from your mouth
You can't tell where the smoke ends
And your chilled breath begins.
This is what it's like to completely lose yourself.
Where do I begin and, more importantly,
Where do I end?

Am I just smoke on the end of your cigarette?
Or am I the glowing ember?
 Nov 2014 Ashley Lani Cross
ryn
^  
/   \
I|   \
I|   /
  I|   . >
   I|     \
    I|      /  
   I|      >
  I|     >
   I|     .\
      I|        .>
•you found
a **key
that wasn't yours
•brazenly opening and entering
boarded doors•pardon this intrusion,
i do so unwillingly•although i only
have myself                 to blame for
not treading this path,
cautiously...•
In and out
Breathe
Stay strong
I'm trying
Stop cutting
Be a good girl
Smile
I can't
Hopeless
Waste of space
Disgrace
*I know
The regular font is a person who doesn't understand depression and addiction. The italicized is the depressed person's answers.
I'm just looking for a safe place to fall  **a
                                                       ­                      p
                                                               ­                         a
                                      ­                                                              r
 ­                                                                 ­                                                t
               ­                                                                 ­                                             ...
I want to cry.
I feel a shiver run through me
As her fingers touch my neck
And she bites my lip
While she tells me she loves me

I could sprout wings and fly
Every time she speaks my name
Her enticing words rolling off her tongue
And composing a symphony in my ears

When she walks,
I'm fascinated with how she sways her hips
And how she turns back to look at me and licks her lips
And my heart starts beating in anticipation

Her skin is soft,
Like I'm running my rough hands across flower petals
And when I kiss her neck,
I hear her breathe in gold and exhale diamonds
While she pulls my hair
Just the way I like it

There's no place I'd rather be
 Nov 2014 Ashley Lani Cross
Jack
~

Take my hand we’ll walk along
this winding path to somewhere far

Through evergreens, cool autumn winds
with cricket songs, and wishing stars

Twists and turns, soft pebbles tossed
in footprints left on sandy shores

Around the bend, down every lane,
you by my side, I need not more

Until we reach the mountain top,
where echoes flow on white cap frost

And we shall shout to all the world
*We are in love and we are lost…together
Prompted by a song sent to me by a good friend.
The driver
she wears mascara
the
last remnant of her humaness
she's always been a
little blessed
she's met her death
many times.

You can hear
her coming on
the winds
freight train sounds
through the Jeffrey Pines
this train isn't
Bound for Glory
this train's bound
for eternity
a one way
ticket with
no return.

Though I've always
rooted for reincarnation.

This train
stops for gamblers
midnight ramblers
**** addled ******
addicts caught between
nodding out and cleaning
the refrigerator with a tooth brush.
Even saints on board will stay.

The oblivion express
your going to hop
on board when your
ticket is punched,
the ticket taker
laughs and smiles
his last glimpse
of humaness.

She's the driver
he's the turnstile
they were once
an item
before they were delivered
to their
new careers
never to see each
other again
except through the
glass of her engine.

The fire is stoked
the express becomes
a local
stopping for each
and every
daily passenger
you can hear that
whistle blow.

You don't know where you're
headed
you just know
you gotta go.
Her mascara drips down
her face
you and she
the ticket taker
too
there is no escape
the oblivion express
just around the corner
and
on its way.
Oblivion Express was the back up band for a guitarist, Robin Trower.
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