Stages keep me moving

In directions

I've avoided

WELCOME signs

Towns I've never dreamed

Until I'm

Standing center stage

Guessing, staring

At my feet

Creepin dirt

Between my toes

It's time to run, I know

Twigs breakin neath my weight
Dust and dirt carry me
Heaviest cloud ever seen

I don't belong in a field full of green
Blooming bright and blooming clean
Oh baby I'm going to a

Tree top canopy

That's the place for me

sticks and stones
a world alone
made blue by my perspective
a field of mice?
well that's alright

you do know that you're bigger
... right?

To open this journal
My own excitement exposed
I'd say I'd
Picked the wrong book
To see exhausted, loud lettering
"Our Wedding"
And to hack at the list
Well,
I just felt
Like a **** floating
Almost sinking with the first wave of water
Then suddenly spinning in an uncontrollable whirlwind of deluge and certain death

Could I ever
Just maybe

..

Could I ever go back to a time
Before I caused such a mess?

Inside the
immolation
of my flaming mind
almost roasting
in its own juices,
thoughts trickling down
into physical matter
and into the
lush cusp of words,
words that twist and turn
and curl around my tongue
as they wind their way
into realms divine
and sacredly profane,
entwining the alchemy
of lost magic
with the fabric of stars--
Yes,
in this trance of absolute divinity
I stand within
my own sacred love temple
ready to take in
whatever comes
in highest form
ready to unfurl and release it
into the breathing spaces
tightly packed between
the tapestry of this existence
so closely interwoven
within the stellar,
cellular matter
of our beings
of earth
of constellation
of fire
of sea
Here,   I need to not only
cast my thoughts
into the vastness of air
not only paint the night sky
with sounds that emerge,
so guttural, from my
deepest knotted chords
but actually consummate
this force within
consume it and be consumed
bring it to light
with my own
sacrosanct
manifestation…
blast it forth
in shoals of white
conjure it from
the source, pristine
    fight the fight
for truth, for love
           and all that's
in
      between

I'm not quite sure
when the dark thought
first came to me;

it crept up softly
and quietly, like a black cat
in the garden of night;

like a light through a crack
in a door opening slowly
and too soon; or perhaps

a drowning man in the deep
waving back at the moon;
too far over his head.